Baddest of the Bands Responses (Marzipan's)

"Stay uncool."

Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People has many responses when you talk to various characters and interact with various objects. These are the responses from Marzipan's House in Baddest of the Bands.

On these pages, A → B (right arrow) means that the response happens when object A is used on thing B, or in the case of talking to other characters, the indicated sequence of chat topic icons are chosen.

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A short horizontal line between two or more responses, such as the one above, means only one of the responses is heard at a time, and that the action results in a different response each time it occurs.

Outside

Coach Z

Only appears after persuading him to go to Marzipan's House while at The Track

First time only STRONG BAD: Coach! How goes your stomach-churning quest for Marzipan's... um, hand? COACH Z: Not so good there, Strong Bad. Now that I'm here, I'm all froze up! What should I do next?

STRONG BAD: Still strikin' out with ol' Baseball Bat, I mean Marzipan? COACH Z: I can't even get her attention! Got any idears?

Coach Z → Boom Box

STRONG BAD: Well, you could try holding a boom box over your head for a few days. COACH Z: I tried that once. Didn't go so hot... {Flashback showing Coach Z standing in front of the Gremlin, which is parked in Marzipan's front yard. He holds a boom box over his head...} BOOM BOX: Toys, toys, toys. Boys, boys, boys. Got the toys. Got the toys... {... for about five seconds, before finding it too heavy and lowering it again.}

Coach Z → Quill and Paper

STRONG BAD: Try readin' some poetry. All the hot lady-types love poetry. COACH Z: Hey, that's right! And if there's one thing I know, it's how to bust a phat rhyme.... yo. One, two, one two. Uh, yo, what light breaks through that window there... it's-a Marzipan, and she's got yellow hair. STRONG BAD: Okay, forget the poetry.

Coach Z → Flying Rock

First time only STRONG BAD: Well, if you want to get her attention, you probably should throw some of those pebbles at her window. That's how they do it in the movies all the time. COACH Z: Hmm, ya think? STRONG BAD: Sure!

Second time only STRONG BAD: Let's try those pebbles again.

STRONG BAD: I still think those pebbles are your best bet.

If the Zen rock is now present, and this is not the first attempt STRONG BAD: I think you should take another shot at throwing those pebbles at her window. COACH Z: Again? STRONG BAD: I've got a goooood feeling about them this time. COACH Z: Ooorkay.

If the Zen rock is not in the gravel First time only {Coach Z grabs a pebble and tosses it against Marzipan's window} COACH Z: Nothin'.

Second time only COACH Z: Still nothin'.

Each time thereafter {Coach Z shrugs} STRONG BAD: Hmmm... those pebbles must be defective, or something.

If the Zen rock is in the gravel COACH Z: Yoo-hoo! {Coach Z grabs the Zen rock and throws it through Marzipan's window, breaking it} COACH Z: Oh, faddle. STRONG BAD: I'll be over... somewhere else. MARZIPAN: {Opening the door, angrily} Strong Bad, what do you think you're-- {Sees Coach Z instead} Coach Z? You know you're not allowed within five hundred feet of my house. COACH Z: But, my darling {stammers}-- MARZIPAN: {Interrupting} Your darling? You just busted my super energy-efficient window! Now skidat! {Slams the door} COACH Z: {Facepalms} Ahh, whud I do? {Bubs walks up} BUBS: Man, that was great! COACH Z: It was? BUBS: Throwing rocks through Old Man Marzipan's window, just like we used to rap about in the old days! COACH Z: Yeah, those was some good times. The ol' {raps} one, two, a-one-one two. BUBS: They sure were, man.

If this is the first or second of Bubs' three criteria to be met BUBS: Well, I got a concert to promote, plan, and embezzle money from. Keep on keepin' it real, ya wussy green sell-out. COACH Z: Will do! BUBS: {Leaves, rapping} Throwing rocks through Old Man Marzipan's window. STRONG BAD: {Emerging from behind the bushes} So, how'd it go with Marzipan? COACH Z: Not so good. {Leaves} STRONG BAD: Breakin' hearts and breakin' windows... Strong Bad style!

If this is the third of Bubs' three criteria to be met BUBS: Listen, I know I've been hard on you for a while, but these last few hours you've really shown me something. You're still an old-school old fool, just like you were back when. COACH Z: I am? BUBS: You bet, man! If you ever want to get the Two-O-Duo back together again, just give me a hollah. {Walks off} COACH Z: {Turns to Strong Bad, coming out of the bushes} Well how about that, Strong Bad? I didn't get the girl, but I got my precious street-cred back. STRONG BAD: It's a washed-up hip-hop miracle! So... about my concert... COACH Z: No time for that now, Strong Bad! I gotta go write some dope rhymes! {Walks away} Let's see here, uh... Coach Z... good teeth... lady somethin'... roast beef...

Coach Z → Cancel

STRONG BAD: Uh... let me get back to you on that. COACH Z: {sighs}

STRONG BAD: Nothin' useful. COACH Z: {sighs}

Zen Rock → Coach Z

STRONG BAD: Beaning Coach Z with rocks is always fun, but I think this rock's destined to do something more... sneaky.

Gravel

When the Zen rock is absent First time only STRONG BAD: Hmm. From the color of this gravel, and the stank of this fish smell, I'd say Marzipan recently cleaned out her aquarium.

STRONG BAD: It's some stank-gravel from Marzipan's aquarium.

When Coach Z is present STRONG BAD: That's the stank gravel that Coach Z's been throwin' at Marzipan's window.

When the Zen rock is present STRONG BAD: I think all those little rocks will achieve a lot more in life with a big brother to look up to.

STRONG BAD: It's a big rock in the middle of some little rocks.

Zen Rock → Gravel

STRONG BAD: {Places the Zen rock in the gravel} These little bits of gravel need a big brother to look up to. There. Hopefully Zen Rock's example will keep these pebbles from turning to a life of crime. Or erosion.

Metal Detector

STRONG BAD: Now THIS is cool. {Finds a shot glass} A Limozeen shot glass of Gary Palaroncini demonstrating the hardest chord ever!

Window

Only clickable before it gets broken. STRONG BAD: This window is usually where I steal fresh pies from Marzipan. Not today, though.

STRONG BAD: Hey, Marzipan's windows. You're looking so breakable today.

Zen Rock → Window

First time only STRONG BAD: Throwing rocks through Marzipan's window WOULD be fun... but getting busted wouldn't.

STRONG BAD: I'm not putting a rock through that window unless I can find someone dumb enough to take the fall for my high-level jinks.

Zen Garden

STRONG BAD: For my money, nothing calms the jangled nerves like screwing with Marzipan's Zen garden.

Zen Rock

STRONG BAD: {Takes the rock} Carefully arranging this rock in my pants will enhance my overall serenity.

Inside

Answering Machine

WADE: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey Marzipan, this is Wade. My name is Wade. Just wanted to say how psyched we are to have you guys involved with Bat-Aid this year. Anyways, just hoping I could score some kind of promo photo of the band, y'know, to put up at the local herbal, coffee, nutritional, food, book... store... yoga, incense. Anyways, be well, sameling.

WADE: Hey, Melissapan, this is Wade. Wade from Bat-Aid... heh, poetry. Uh, listen, you got any Cool Tapes photos with just that baseball bat dude in 'em? Those other two... creatures are really starting to freak people out around here, and not in the good way. Heh, heh. Be well, sameling.

Cage

When bat is present Before talking to Marzipan about Bat-Aid STRONG BAD: Yikes, that is one pathetic-looking bat. MARZIPAN: For your information, Strong Bad, that is Pazquel, an endangered and precious Lithuanian Albino Vegan Bat.

STRONG BAD: So, are you guys gonna justify this bat's existence by biting its head off, or what? MARZIPAN: Eww, gross.

After talking to Marzipan about Bat-Aid First time only STRONG BAD: I don't see how a concert's gonna keep this guy from drowning in Darwin's gene pool. MARZIPAN: Don't you listen to him, Pazquel.

STRONG BAD: Ick.

When bat is absent STRONG BAD: Even though the nasty bat is gone, the nasty bat cage is still plenty nasty.

Bat Hutch → Cage

If the bats have not yet been bleached STRONG BAD: I don't think these manly brown fruit bats want anything to do with that sickly albino loser-bat.

If the bats have been bleached {Has the same effect as Bat Hutch → Marzipan}

The Cheat

STRONG BAD: Man, you GOTTA stop wasting your time {subtitled as "talents"} with Marzipan and join a REAL band! THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises} STRONG BAD: A three-album deal with guaranteed four-point back end!? Ding-dang, maybe I should join the Cool Tapes! MARZIPAN: {angrily} Maybe you should stop interrupting our rehearsals.

Contest Entry Forms → The Cheat

Before Cool Tapes joins the Battle of the Bands STRONG BAD: Hey, The Cheat, wanna become a rock 'n' roll god, like Whammy Bargeroth? THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises} MARZIPAN: {angrily} If you've got any offers for the band, run them by me first, Strong Bad. STRONG BAD: Don't you trust The Cheat? MARZIPAN: The last time we let The Cheat sign something, we ended up doing that horrible promotional campaign... {A record cover appears for the Cool Tapes'Doin' the Wigglie, featuring Marshie. The song plays while Marshie flies all around the screen singing his lyrics.} MARZIPAN: {singing on record} We're Cool Tapes and we're all jiggly. MARSHIE: Ooooo! MARZIPAN: {singing on record} Stuck in here with Marshie and we're doin' the Wigglie. MARSHIE: Doin' the Wigglie! Wiggle, waggle, wiggle, waggle, wiggle, waggle, go! Wiggle, waggle, wiggle, waggle, wiggle, waggle, go! I SAID GO! {Record vanishes, and Strong Bad glances around the room}

STRONG BAD: Hey, The Cheat! MARZIPAN: {sings angrily} Stop bothering our drummer, Strong Bad!

After Cool Tapes joins the Battle of the Bands STRONG BAD: They're already signed up.

Photo → The Cheat

STRONG BAD: Check it out, The Cheat! THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises} STRONG BAD: Yeah, my seven-year-old self was right! This is the most awesomest album cover ever!

Sword → The Cheat

If Strong Bad does not have both the defaced album and the contest flyer STRONG BAD: Hey, The Cheat! THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises} STRONG BAD: I don't know what you're supposed to do with it. I was hoping you'd have some idea.

If Strong Bad has both the defaced album and the contest flyer STRONG BAD: Hey, The Cheat, I've got a great idea! THE CHEAT: Meh? STRONG BAD: {brings out sword} I need a hot blonde to hold this sword for the Greatest Album Cover Ever, and you're the closest thing available. THE CHEAT: {Excited The Cheat noises} {The Cheat takes the sword and strikes a pose. Fanfare plays. The Cheat puts the sword away.} STRONG BAD: I knew I could count on you, The Cheat! I'll see you later at the shoot. Don't forget to wear a bikini!

Cool Tapes Logo

STRONG BAD: That's the original Cool Tapes graffiti that gave Marzipan the idea for her band. Considering Homestar painted it, she's lucky both words are spelled correctly.

Stencil → Cool Tapes Logo

STRONG BAD: That's a really good idea! ...But it's wrong.

Glossies

If Strong Bad does not already have one First time only STRONG BAD: Cool Tapes glamour shots. Suitable for framing, autographing, or elaborate voodoo rituals. I'll just take one, in case I need to place an emergency hex on Marzipan, or something. {Takes one}

STRONG BAD: I'll just take another one. {Takes one}

If Strong Bad does already have one STRONG BAD: I don't need a bunch of Cool Tapes photos cluttering up my infinite pockets.

Kitchen Door

STRONG BAD: Marzipan always keeps her kitchen boarded up when Strong Mad's around.

Marzipan

STRONG BAD: Marzipan! MARZIPAN: Take five, everyone! What is it, Strong Bad?

STRONG BAD: Yo! MARZIPAN: Bring it down, gang! What now, Strong Bad?

In extended play

STRONG BAD: I'm surprised you guys didn't break up after your epic meltdown at the concert. MARZIPAN: Are you kidding? Ever since the concert we've had to beat the gig offers away with a stick! It turns out there's a HUGE anti-Limozeen audience out there!

Marzipan → Cool Tapes

Before giving Marzipan the bleached bat hutch STRONG BAD: What're you guys practicing for? MARZIPAN: The Cool Tapes have been invited to perform at a concert to benefit the endangered Lithuanian Albino Vegan Bat, like {shot of bat cage} poor little Pazquel over there. STRONG BAD: Ick, yuck!

After giving Marzipan the bleached bat hutch STRONG BAD: What are the Cool Tapes gonna do now that your grody little bats aren't endangered any more? MARZIPAN: Oh, I don't know, we'll probably find a gig somewhere. There's always a bird or a rock that needs to hear a song!

After Cool Tapes joins the Battle of the Bands STRONG BAD: So, are you stoked about being in my Battle of the Bands or what? MARZIPAN: Well, I'm a little concerned about Limozeen's involvement, but as a whole I'd say that Cool Tapes is ready to conscientiously rock the house!

Marzipan → Strong Sad

Only available until Strong Bad spray-cheeses SECURITY on the Strong Badia fence

STRONG BAD: What's Strong Sad doing lurking around here? MARZIPAN: HE thinks he's some sort of a snooty rock journalist now, but I think he's here to raid my bran muffins. {Cut to Strong Sad covering his mouth with his left hand} STRONG SAD: {mouth full} I am not!

Marzipan → Battle of the Bands Stage

Only available until Cool Tapes joins the Battle of the Bands

Before giving Marzipan the bleached bat hutch First time only STRONG BAD: {Gets out the entry forms} Are the Cool Tapes cool enough to compete in my Battle Royale of the Baaaaands-suh!? MARZIPAN: Battle Royale of the Bands? Hmm... oh, too bad. STRONG BAD: Too bad? MARZIPAN: Your contest is on the same weekend we're playing a benefit show for the endangered Lithuanian Albino Vegan Bat, like {shot of bat cage} poor little Pazquel over there. STRONG BAD: {Puts entry forms away} You're turning out a shot at the big time for a bunch of salad-munching, pink-eyed no-blood-suckers? MARZIPAN: Yup!

STRONG BAD: Sure you won't change your mind about entering my Battle of the Bands? MARZIPAN: As long as these bats are still endangered, the Cool Tapes will stand ready to rock on their behalf!

After giving Marzipan the bleached bat hutch STRONG BAD: So, now that it turns out those Lithium Algonquin Veggie Bats aren't so endangered, maybe the Cool Tapes will reconsider? {Pulls out the Contest Entry Form} MARZIPAN: Hmm... Battle Royale of the Bands... with celebrity judges Limozeen? STRONG BAD: Pretty cool, huh? MARZIPAN: I don't know, I've read some pretty awful stories about Limozeen. STRONG BAD: They'll be on their best behavior, I promise. MARZIPAN: What do you say, Cool Tapers? Should we enter? THE CHEAT: {Excited The Cheat noises} STRONG MAD: SHALL! SHALL! {Wiggles his eyebrows} MARZIPAN: It's unanimous, then! {Fills in the entry form} The Cool Tapes will officially bring their pop folk thunder to the Battle Royale of the Bands. Here's our entry form. {Gives it to Strong Bad. Firmly} And tell Bubs that our entry fee is in the mail. STRONG BAD: Couldn't you just give ME the money? MARZIPAN: Sure. I could also comb my hair with live scorpions, but that doesn't make it a good idea. STRONG BAD: You're right, it's a great idea!

Marzipan → Coach Z

After talking to Coach Z, but before he comes to Marzipan's house STRONG BAD: {singsong voice} You've got a secret admirerrrr! MARZIPAN: That's sweet Strong Bad, but I've sorta already got a boyfriend. STRONG BAD: Wait, you think that's me? But I didn't... Ugh, don't make me ralph! I was talking about Coach Z! MARZIPAN: Don't worry, your secret's safe with me.

When Coach Z is standing outside First time only STRONG BAD: Don't look now, but Coach Z is "pining" outside your window. MARZIPAN: Don't remind me. I KNEW that autographed picture was a bad idea. STRONG BAD: Should I go out and, uh, rough him up? Please? MARZIPAN: I think if we just ignore him, he'll go away.

STRONG BAD: Sure you don't want me to give Coach Z the old heave-ho? MARZIPAN: That'd just encourage him.

After Marzipan's window is broken STRONG BAD: I can't believe Coach Z broke your window. MARZIPAN: At least it's only one window this time. Back when the Two-O-Duo was popular, my windows were being broken every other day. STRONG BAD: Ah, good times...

Marzipan → Cancel

STRONG BAD: Stay uncool. MARZIPAN: You know it!

STRONG BAD: Well, I'll let you get back to killin' that cat... or whatever that noise you were makin' was. MARZIPAN: G'bye!

Bat Hutch → Marzipan

If the bats have not yet been bleached STRONG BAD: Hey Marzipan, take a look at these guys. MARZIPAN: Aww, what cute little fruit bats. They're lucky that no one wants to eat, wear, or snort them, like the poor endangered Lithuanian Albino Vegan Bat!

If the bats have been bleached STRONG BAD: {Gets out the bat hutch} Hey Marzipan, lookie what I found! MARZIPAN: Hmm, could it be? Gimme a high "meh", The Cheat. THE CHEAT: Meeeeeeeh! {With high-pitched harmonics} {The bleached bats fly in from off-screen, as Strong Bad puts the (apparently) always empty bat hutch away} MARZIPAN: Oh my, it's a chiropterological miracle! STRONG MAD: BATS! BATS! BATS! MARZIPAN: {Walks over to the bat cage and opens it} Here, Pazquel. Go and join your brothers and sisters. {Shot of the door from outside as it shakes. Eventually it opens and the bats fly out.}

If Coach Z is present outside {Coach Z runs past, pursued by the bats} COACH Z: Whoa, mama!

If Coach Z is not outside {One of the bats turns back, grabs the handle, and shuts the door}

MARZIPAN: Gosh, I guess the Lithuanian Albino Vegan Bat isn't so endangered after all. Good, I didn't really want to do that benefit concert anyway. Confidentially, I never really trusted Pazquel.

Contest Entry Forms → Marzipan

Same effect as Marzipan → Battle of the Bands Stage

After Cool Tapes joins the Battle of the Bands STRONG BAD: They're already signed up.

Glossy → Marzipan

STRONG BAD: Hey Marzipan! Could I get you to sign this Cool Tapes picture? MARZIPAN: Sure thing! Who should I make it out to?

Glossy → Marzipan → Strong Bad

STRONG BAD: Make it out to "Awesome Strong Bad." {Gives Marzipan the glossy} MARZIPAN: {Angrily, writing on the glossy} Fine. "To awesome Strong Bad. You are not awesome. Love, Marzipan." Here. {Gives it back} STRONG BAD: Fine, I was just gonna throw poison-tipped darts at it anyway.

STRONG BAD: "Strong Bad, the human kick-in-the-crotch!" {Gives Marzipan the glossy} MARZIPAN: {writing on the glossy} I'm not writing that unless you WANT one of those. Here. {Gives it back} STRONG BAD: "The human drippy drawers"? Hey!

Glossy → Marzipan → Homestar

STRONG BAD: Make it out to {overly-enunciating} "Homestar." {Gives Marzipan the glossy} MARZIPAN: {Angrily, writing on the glossy} What, he's too busy to see me himself? Fine. Here! {Gives it back} STRONG BAD: Ouch! Is there such a thing as "written domestic abuse?"

Glossy → Marzipan → Bubs

STRONG BAD: Make it out to Buh-bs. {Gives Marzipan the glossy} MARZIPAN: {writing on the glossy} "Dear Bubs. Thanks for all the free recyclable guitar picks, Marzipan." Here ya go! {Gives it back} STRONG BAD: Thanks!

Glossy → Marzipan → Coach Z

Only available until Strong Bad gives Coach Z a glossy that's addressed to him STRONG BAD: How 'bout one for Coach Z? {Gives Marzipan the glossy} MARZIPAN: Oh, I'm not sure that's such a good idea. He's been sending us some pretty disturbing fan mail lately... STRONG BAD: That's just Z bein' Z. MARZIPAN: Oh, okay. {writing on the glossy, in a very resigned voice} "Dear Coach Z, all my best, Marzipan." {Gives it back} STRONG BAD: Cool. I'm sure he'll love it.

Glossy → Marzipan → Homsar

STRONG BAD: How 'bout one for Homsar? {Gives Marzipan the glossy} MARZIPAN: He's a fan? STRONG BAD: Oh yeah, he raves about the Cool Tapes all the time! At least, I think he does... he's raving about something. MARZIPAN: Cool! Let's see... {writing on the glossy} "Dear Homsar. Spaghetti dump truck laser beams! Wheezily, Matzah Ball." {Gives it back} STRONG BAD: Niiiice.

Glossy → Marzipan → Cancel

STRONG BAD: On second thought, skip it.

Sword → Marzipan

If Strong Bad does not have both the defaced album and the contest flyer STRONG BAD: I'd rather not start waving my weapons around Marzipan without a good reason. The last time, she hit me with some sort of... pepper... taser.

If Strong Bad has both the defaced album and the contest flyer First time only STRONG BAD: Hey Marzipan! MARZIPAN: What? STRONG BAD: {Brings out sword} Could you hold this for me? MARZIPAN: Why? STRONG BAD: I'm working on this album cover, and I need a hot blonde to pose in a bikini with a giant sword on top of a flaming car. And even though you aren't really all that hot-- {Marzipan whacks Strong Bad with her guitar} STRONG BAD: So you'll think about it? {Turns away} Lucky for me, Marzipan's not the only blonde in town.

STRONG BAD: I'd better not. I don't think my face can stand any more invisible slapping. I wonder if there are any other hot blondes who might wanna pose for me?

"Thank You" Painting

STRONG BAD: You're welcome!

Strong Mad

STRONG BAD: What's the woid, big guy? STRONG MAD: LITHUANIAN? MARZIPAN: You can talk to him AFTER rehearsal, Strong Bad.

Contest Entry Forms → Strong Mad

Before Cool Tapes joins the Battle of the Bands STRONG BAD: Hey, big fella. How'd you like to be a big star? Er... a bigger star? STRONG MAD: STAR? MARZIPAN: {Angrily} Don't bother brother Strong Mad, Strong Bad. {Happily} Hey, that could be a song! {Sings} Don't bother brother Strong Mad, Strong Bad.

After Cool Tapes joins the Battle of the Bands STRONG BAD: They're already signed up.

Bat Hutch → Strong Mad

STRONG MAD: SING FOR BATS!!! LA-LA-LA!!!

Stuffed Poodonkis → Strong Mad

STRONG BAD: After all the grief I went through to get this thing, there's no way I'm just giving it back to him.

Strong Sad

Only appears until Strong Bad spray-cheeses SECURITY on the Strong Badia fence STRONG BAD: Hey, teenage lobotomy. STRONG SAD: Don't bother me, Strong Bad, I've got snooty rock journalism to pursue.

STRONG BAD: Hey. STRONG SAD: Can this wait? I'm hot on the trail of a story!

Strong Sad → Strong Sad

STRONG BAD: What drags you out to Cool Tapes' practice space, I mean, waste of space? STRONG SAD: I'm covering the Cool Tapes' preparations for their next gig, a benefit concert for the Vegan Albino Bat. STRONG BAD: Wow. Slow music news day, huh? STRONG SAD: I'm also keeping my ears open for chatter about any hot new acts. The Cool Tapes have lots of connections in the underground music scene.

Strong Sad → Cool Tapes

STRONG BAD: How'd Marzipan get two kinda cool guys like Strong Mad and The Cheat in her band anyway? STRONG SAD: She lets them each write one song per album. STRONG BAD: Ah, that would explain a lot.

Strong Sad → Battle of the Bands Stage

STRONG BAD: Hey, I got a story for you, Mister Snooty Rock Journalist: "Prepare ye all butts for maximum kickage, as Strong Bad organizes a legendary Battle Royale of the Bands!!" STRONG SAD: No, you're not. STRONG BAD: No, really. It'll have security and celebrity judges and everything! STRONG SAD: And ponies? STRONG BAD: Yeah, and ponies! Whu-hey! STRONG SAD: {Chortles}

Strong Sad → Security Jacket

First time only STRONG BAD: {In his hyping-it-up voice} Check out this article of clothing. STRONG SAD: What is it?

STRONG BAD: So, about that jacket I showed you. STRONG SAD: Yes?

Strong Sad → Security Jacket → Angel

First time only, and only if the Angel option is selected first STRONG BAD: It's a security jacket. Y'know, the kind worn by security guards at concerts. STRONG SAD: Okay, I can't stand those guys. They're always laughing at my press pass.

STRONG BAD: It's not really a tour jacket. It's just a run-of-the-mill security jacket. STRONG SAD: I don't believe you. STRONG BAD: What? STRONG SAD: I think you're just trying to cover up for liking a band no one's ever heard of.

Strong Sad → Security Jacket → Devil

STRONG BAD: {If the Angel option is chosen first, add: It's not really a security jacket.} It's a tour jacket for this hot new indie rock band called Security! STRONG SAD: "Security?" I've heard people talking about them. A lot of people. STRONG BAD: See? They're hot! STRONG SAD: But talk is cheap. Legit indie bands have street teams that use guerilla marketing tactics to get their name and logo up all over the place.

Strong Sad → Cancel

STRONG BAD: Well, you're lame and I'm awesome. Bye. STRONG SAD: See ya.

STRONG BAD: All right, I'm outta here. Watch out for the bats, Hunter S. Dumpson. STRONG SAD: Oh. Bye.

STRONG BAD: See ya later, Dumptake. STRONG SAD: Later.

Sword or Bat Hutch → Strong Sad

STRONG BAD: After all the grief I went through to get this thing, there's no way I'm just giving it back to him.

Window

Only clickable before it gets broken. STRONG BAD: This window is usually where I steal fresh pies from Marzipan. Not today, though.

STRONG BAD: Hey, Marzipan's windows. You're looking so breakable today.

Zen Rock → Window

First time only STRONG BAD: Throwing rocks through Marzipan's window WOULD be fun... but getting busted wouldn't.

STRONG BAD: I'm not putting a rock through that window unless I can find someone dumb enough to take the fall for my high-level jinks.

Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People
Produced by Telltale Games and Videlectrix
Promotional Media	Strong Bad Gameways, Advertisement, Gameplay Trailer, Tech Demo, Dev Blog, Workin' on the Game, Behind The Bad (1, 2, 3), Make a Scene with Telltale: Strong Bad Edition, Collector's DVD,
All Episodes	Tutorial, WiiWare Intros
Episode 1: Homestar Ruiner	Gameplay: Walkthrough, Snake Boxer 5, Teen Girl Squad Responses: House of Strong, Marzipan's, K.o.T. Castle, The Track, The Field Promotional Media: Homestar at the Track, Around the Field, Behind The Bad Chapter 1: The New Hire Songs: Handle My Style, Fluffy Puff Jela-ton, Showdown
Episode 2: Strong Badia the Free	Gameplay: Walkthrough, Math Kickers, Cave Girl Squad, Maps and Minions Various: Countries, Homsartifacts Responses: Bleak House, The Field, Homsar Reservation, Pompomerania, Country, Marzistar, The Castle Promotional Media: Gameplay Trailer Songs: Justice Combo Meal
Episode 3: Baddest of the Bands	Gameplay: Walkthrough, Limozeen's Hot Babelien Odyssey, Teen Girl Squad Meets Limozeen Various: Bands Responses: House of Strong, The Field, Marzipan's, Club Technochocolate, The Track, Battle of the Bands stages Promotional Media: Gameplay Trailer, Behind The Bad Chapter 2: The Heist, Promo, baddestofthebands.com Songs: Food-Related Love, Cool Tapes songs, Other songs
Episode 4: Dangeresque 3: The Criminal Projective	Gameplay: Walkthrough, Space Circus Catastrophe Responses: Smoky Office, Brainblow City, Strongborneo, Secret Lab, Catacombs, Old Club, Cutesy's House, World Locations, The Sun Promotional Media: Dangeresque: Puppet Squad, Gameplay Clips, Mini-Site Songs: Today is Alright 4 2Nite
Episode 5: 8-Bit is Enough	Gameplay: Walkthrough, Gel-Arshie's Pro Fruitboarder, Redcoat Ghost Patrol, Trogdor's 3D-Ungeon Various: Character Variations, Spirits of '76, Halfathlon Responses: House of Strong, The Field, Crates, Videlectrix Mainframe, Halfathlon, Gel-Arshie's Backstage, Stinkoman 20X6, Peasantry Promotional Media: Behind The Bad Chapter 3: The Last Straw