Senor Mortgage

This article is about the short. For the mortgage company, see Senor Cardgage Mortgage.

"We can help you get a leg up on the pile!"

Senor Cardgage has a mortgage commercial. Or something.

Cast (in order of appearance): Balding Man, Senor Cardgage, Visor Robot

Places: The Office

Date: Tuesday, June 29, 2004

Running Time: 1:22

Page Title: Need A Loan??!!

DVD:Everything Else, Volume 1

Transcript

{Balding Man stands in front of a newspaper background.}

VOICEOVER: {imitating buzzing noise} ERHT!

{A red "NOT APPROVED!!" flashes across the screen. Balding Man shrugs, frowns, and sighs.}

VOICEOVER: Are you having a problem buying a home {thought bubble appears with a blue house in it} or something? {another thought bubble appears with a partly-eaten Pop-Tart} Fret no more!

{Cut to Senor Cardgage in the office}

SENOR CARDGAGE: Hi there, Belindas! I'm Senor Cardgage for Senor Cardgage Mort-gage. {logo appears for Senor Cardgage Mortgage} We can help you get a leg up on the pile! Low rates, percent signs... I dunno... {as Senor Cardgage says this, the words "low rates" and a bunch of percent signs fall from the logo}

VOICEOVER: Bad credit? {the words "BAD CREDIT??" appear on the screen, with a frowning face in the A, a thumbs-down in the D of CREDIT, and a blue background with the word "YES!" repeated. The thumbs-down grows larger and changes to a thumbs-up, and the background changes to yellow with the word "YUP!"}

SENOR CARDGAGE: No probalo! {the words "NO PROBALO!" appear in the thumbs-up}

{Cut back to Senor Cardgage in the office}

SENOR CARDGAGE: Home Lawn, Escrow, Re-Financin', {these words appear in boxes coming out of Senor Cardgage's mouth} you name it, we've got it! Come along down for a free canceltation {the words "FREE CANCELTATION!" flash for a few seconds} with one of our handsome talking experts. {motions towards empty chair behind him} One o' them said they'd buy me lunch. But I don't see nobody taking me to Chick-fil-A.

{Cut to the Visor Robot with a caption that says "Not a Robot!"}

VISOR ROBOT: {in a robotic voice} Senor Cardgage Mort-gage helped consolidate my whole life into this tiny box. {He holds up a small wooden crate labeled 'FRESH'} Thanks Senor Mort-gage!

{Cut back to Senor Cardgage}

SENOR CARDGAGE: You're every welcome, Valerie. Act now {the words "ACT NOW!!!!" flash on the screen} and see if you can stand to talk to me for more than four seconds!

{A countdown appears on screen, flashing a little faster and counting down from four seconds. The logo appears right when "1 SECOND!" appears on screen.}

JINGLE SINGERS: Get a leg up on the pile and refinance your dreams! {the words appear on the screen} Come along down and dial {as they sing, the phone number 555-55-55855-55-5-SENOR-MORT-GAGE-TODAY appears on the screen, a whistle is heard and Balding Man dances with his arms raised above his head} five five five five five five five eight five

VISOR ROBOT and JINGLE SINGERS: Five five five five SENOR-MORT-GAGE— {at this there is a slight pause for dramatic effect, and Balding Man falls off screen}—TODAY!

SENOR CARDGAGE: {phases through logo} No probalo!

Easter Eggs

"My name is nooot Vaaleeriiieee..."

• Click on the dollar sign in the 'g' at the end to see a short scene with the Visor Robot malfunctioning.

VISOR ROBOT: Priority override seven dash forty deuce. Directive six R? {voice speeds up, becomes unintelligible} Malfunctionmalfunction Cardgage mortgage {head spins and emits smoke} mortgagemortgagemortgage help consoli— help consoli— help consoli— {An explosion blows the robot's head off, revealing a flashing red light bulb. The light bulb emits smoke and grows dimmer as The Robot trails off.} VISOR ROBOT: My name is nooot Vaaleeriiieee...

Fun Facts

Explanations

• This short is making fun of TV mortgage ads, specifically ones that have witty phone numbers that are included in the jingle.
• When this toon debuted, The Brothers Chaps were ambiguous as to whether Senor Cardgage was real or just an example of how Strong Bad would look with a creepy comb-over. This is evidenced by its description in the Toons Menu: "Wait, is Senor Cardgage real!?!" By the time of the commentary on garage sale, they acknowledged that he was indeed a separate character.
• Senor Cardgage calls the robot "Valerie" because of his gender-confused habit of referring to everyone as females even though they're not, as he does in kind of cool.
• Escrow is a term for a legal arrangement in which a third party holds money or property in trust until the proper recipient fulfills the conditions of a contract.
• Refinancing is the act of obtaining a new loan in order to pay off an existing loan, generally because the new loan offers more favorable terms.

Trivia

The newspaper in the background.

• "No probalo" is a mangled version of the phrase "no problemo", which is mock-Spanish for 'no problem'. (Actual Spanish would be "no hay problema".)
• The phone number 555-55-55855-55-5-SENOR-MORT-GAGE-TODAY would translate as 555-55-55855-55-5-73667-6678-4243-86329.
• The cubicle in the background was originally seen in dullard.
• The classified ads in the beginning are apparently actual real estate listings from the New York Times for the East Coast. While it's largely illegible, one can make out headings for Westchester, Nassau, and Suffolk Counties, as well as Manhattan (all in New York State), and the states of Massachusetts, Vermont, Maine, Maryland, Georgia, and Florida. Also visible are Bronxville, New Rochelle, North Salem, Scarsdale and Yonkers, all municipalities in Westchester County.
• The robot voice in Senor Mortgage is actually the SAPI5 version of Microsoft Sam found on Windows XP. However, the voice was distorted slightly to sound more robotic.
• This toon was one of the last ones to have the old non-Flash Navigation Bar. It was changed to the new Flash bar sometime after the release of this toon.
• This is the first time the Visor Robot is seen from the front. Previously, he was only seen from the side.
• The YouTube description for this toon is "Get a leg up on the pile and refinance your dreams at Senor Cardgage Mortgage."

Remarks

• Senor Cardgage's creepy comb-over switches sides when he talks to the Visor Robot (it switches back though after he moves his head) and again at the very end as he is walking forward while the phone number jingle is being sung.
• The Visor Robot is facing forward during the testimonial, but its torso appears to still be facing sideways.

Goofs

Not quite there.

• In the beginning, when Balding Man sighs, an oval around his mouth is tinted slightly pink.
• One of the arms of Senor Cardgage's glasses does not quite reach the edge of the left side of his face.
• Near the fade-out to the jingle, Senor Cardgage jumps to the left.

Inside References

• Senor Cardgage mentions low rates.

Real-World References

• The jingle has the same chord progression as The Isley Brothers' "Twist and Shout".
• Chick-fil-A is a fast-food restaurant chain based in Atlanta, Georgia.
• The balding man and the "Not approved" from the beginning stem from a 1980s commercial for Champion Home Equity loans, which begins with a balding man having "Not approved" stamped onto his forehead by his bank.
• The jingle resembles the Empire Today carpet jingle.

DVD Version

• The DVD version features hidden creators' commentary. To access it, switch your DVD player's audio language selection while watching.

Commentary Transcript

(Commentary by: Matt Chapman, Mike Chapman)

MATT: That guy is not approved.

MIKE: He's got— also got a bite out of his Pop Tart.

MATT: Strawberry frosting!

MIKE: Strawberry prop— prop— propted— Pop Tart. Umm so when did— how did Senor Cardgage get invented? Didn't you just write that word in a sketchbook?

MATT: Yeah.

MIKE: Senor Cardgage?

MATT: Yeah. And then, uh, that was the same thing where it said "Senor Cardgage", "Homestar Runner is the money makah", and "Strong Sad in a doo-rag"!

MIKE: {laughs} It just said those three things?

MATT: Yeah. And, uh, originally, that bush that he comes out in, in— uh, comes out of in the email that he's in was going to be called Strongberg.

MIKE: {laughs} Really?

MATT: That's written—

MIKE: Is that what the symbol's called?

MATT: That's written down somewhere, yeah. I think the symbol's called that, too. Chick-fil-A is a local restaurant {mumbles} southeast {mumbles}. {pause} So, this gives voice to the— er, I guess he has a voice at the beginning of Everybody to the Limit—

MIKE: Yeah. Fhqwhgads.

MATT: But he's never said much more than, "Come on, Fhqwgads."

MIKE: So, there's kind of a guy outside of our office that reminds us of Senor Mortage!

MATT: Yeah. He's—

MIKE: Harmless but creepy, but you know, you just never know what, uh... whether— he feels like— I feel like he knows more than me.

MATT: {laughs} He's got some of life's secrets.

MIKE: Oh, we're done.

External Links

• watch "Senor Mortgage"
• watch "Senor Mortgage" on YouTube
• watch "Senor Mortgage" on the old Flash site
• view the Flash file for "Senor Mortgage"