Subtitles sbemail92/en

WM0

These are the English subtitles for kind of cool. watch this toon To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the All-In-One Greasemonkey script for Firefox or the Homestar All-In-One extension for Chrome. It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on homestarrunner.com and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our local viewer.

en  de  he  es  fr  nl  fi  pl  pt-br  tr

<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="sbemail92.swf" width="550" height="400">
  <line start="17" end="60" speaker="strongbad">Thanks for choosing Strong Bad Email. Would you like to try a combo meal?</line>
  <line start="72" end="87" speaker="strongbad">"Hey strong bad,"</line>
  <line start="87" end="177" speaker="strongbad">"Dude, I was just thinkin' and wonderin' what it would be like if you weren't the stylish, buff, handsome man in a wrestling mask that you are."</line>
  <line start="177" end="195" speaker="strongbad">"Your devoted fan,"</line>
  <line start="195" end="218" speaker="strongbad">"Jor-dan"</line>
  <line start="218" end="286" speaker="strongbad">So you mean, like, what would it be like if I was an ugly dumpy guy with a beer belly and a comb-over? </line>
  <line start="286" end="335" speaker="strongbad"> I'd still probably be the coolest guy in the world, just a different kind of cool. </line>
  <line start="335" end="381" speaker="strongbad"> More of a "I'm so cool, you don't even know I'm cool" kind of cool. </line>
  <line start="381" end="401" speaker="strongbad">Or the kind of cool where I'm--</line>
  <line start="401" end="457" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">--always walking around with a plastic grocery bag full of mysterious unknown contents.</line>
  <line start="463" end="493" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Maybe it's cold pizza. Maybe it's rotten vegetables.</line>
  <line start="497" end="529" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Or maybe it's the shattered pieces of my former life.</line>
  <line start="545" end="612" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Or maybe it's just full of a bunch of melty candy bars that<br />I eat really loudly while standing too close to you in line.</line>
  <line start="673" end="714" speaker="homestar">Hey, Pom Pom. This guy smells like pea soup.</line>
  <line start="726" end="746" speaker="homestar"><em>(Singing)</em><br/>You smell like pea sooooup!</line>
  <line start="752" end="814" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">And then I'd always be suspiciously coming out of bushes and<br />shrubs a lot. Like, right when you walk by.</line>
  <line start="820" end="829" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">And if I see you,</line>
  <line start="829" end="834" speaker="homestar">Whoa!</line>
  <line start="834" end="877" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">I'd say some cool phrase that's<br />almost one word and not quite another.</line>
  <line start="886" end="907" speaker="cardgage">Oh, excardon me!</line>
  <line start="914" end="931" speaker="homestar">Um,</line>
  <line start="931" end="952" speaker="homestar"><em>(Singing)</em><br/>I don't know what that meeeans!</line>
  <line start="959" end="985" speaker="homestar"><em>(Singing)</em><br/>And you still smell like pea soooup!</line>
  <line start="992" end="1052" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">And I'd be so cool, that even if you were a dude,<br />I'd still call at you like you were a lady.</line>
  <line start="1090" end="1176" speaker="cardgage">I'm very sorry, ma'am, but could you help an old denominator,<br />like me, gather his spectacles?</line>
  <line start="1205" end="1285" speaker="cardgage">I'm sorry, ma'am. Would you mind helping an old<br />wintergreen gather his spectacles?</line>
  <line start="1305" end="1397" speaker="cardgage">Sorry to bother you, ma'am. Could you help an old<br />Soderbergh gather his spectacles?</line>
  <line start="1426" end="1444" speaker="strongmad">NOOOO!!!</line>
  <line start="1448" end="1481" speaker="strongbad">That's a pretty cool guy right there.</line>
  <line start="1482" end="1514" speaker="strongbad">It's good to know that if I ever let myself go and...</line>
  <line start="1515" end="1536" speaker="strongbad">grow a couple feet...</line>
  <line start="1537" end="1555" speaker="strongbad">live behind a bush... </line>
  <line start="1555" end="1573" speaker="strongbad">I'll be sitting pretty. </line>
  <line start="1573" end="1598" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Uh, excardon me,</line>
  <line start="1598" end="1627" speaker="strongsad">but none of that stuff is cool, Strong Bad.</line>
  <line start="1628" end="1694" speaker="strongsad">You basically described that creep Señor Cardgage that<br />lived down the street from us when we were little.</line>
  <line start="1695" end="1733" speaker="strongbad">What!? You didn't think Senor Cardgage was cool?</line>
  <line start="1734" end="1785" speaker="strongsad">No! He was extremely sketchy and gave me nightmares!</line>
  <line start="1786" end="1826" speaker="strongbad">And... What's not cool about giving you nightmares?</line>
  <line start="1827" end="1885" speaker="strongsad">Oh never mind. Go back to your creepy comb-over story.</line>
  <line start="1897" end="1963" speaker="strongbad">Anyways, Jor-dan, creepy comb-over story Strong Bad is definitely a cool, cool guy. </line>
  <line start="1963" end="2008" speaker="strongbad">In fact, I wouldn't mind hanging out with a guy like that. </line>
  <line start="2008" end="2050" speaker="strongbad">Well, things certainly are looking up for the future. </line>
  <line start="2050" end="2094" speaker="strongbad">Me, I'm gonna go look up Senor Cardgage. </line>
  <line start="2094" end="2114" speaker="strongbad">See where that guy ended up.</line>
  <line start="2114" end="2127" speaker="sfx">The geddup noise</line>
  <line start="2127" end="2138" speaker="thepaper">Preeow!</line>
<!-- Easter Egg -->
  <line start="2153" end="2183" speaker="strongbad">So, uh, you're really cool.</line>
  <line start="2184" end="2236" speaker="cardgage">Thank you ma'am. Would you care for a slice of gum?</line>
  <line start="2237" end="2269" speaker="strongbad">Yeah, totally, I'd be way into a slice of gum.</line>
  <line start="2280" end="2307" speaker="strongbad" volume="0.9">Man! So cool!</line>
  <line start="2308" end="2329" speaker="strongbad">Uh... Say something else.</line>
  <line start="2330" end="2412" speaker="cardgage">I have to be going, Ethel. I've got some important lines to stand in.</line>
  <line start="2413" end="2443" speaker="strongbad">Oh... Will I ever see you again?</line>
  <line start="2444" end="2464" speaker="cardgage">Ex-obably not.</line>
</transcript>