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These are the English subtitles for A Folky Tale. watch this toon
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<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8" ?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="dumpingtontoon.swf" width="550" height="400">
<line start="42" end="72" speaker="coachz">Come on, Strong Sad, I knows you can do it!</line>
<line start="73" end="124" speaker="coachz">Just cram a little oom-pah down your pants, and you'll be up that rope in no times!</line>
<line start="125" end="190" speaker="strongsad">Look, I'm willing to ignore that "oom-pah down my pants" comment,</line>
<line start="191" end="233" speaker="strongsad">but I'm more concerned with what that rope is attached to.</line>
<line start="234" end="264" speaker="coachz">Never you mind! Just get to climbin'!</line>
<line start="265" end="295" speaker="strongsad">Coach Z, ropes are for dopes!</line>
<line start="296" end="340" speaker="coachz">What's that jargle? Scripture? You quotin' scripture?</line>
<line start="341" end="410" speaker="strongsad">No, it's a quote from Saddy Dumpington, the legendary folk hero I made up.</line>
<line start="411" end="444" speaker="coachz">Sounds kinda like a terlet if ya ask me.</line>
<line start="447" end="488" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Hark to the Folky Tale of Saddy Dumpington,</line>
<line start="489" end="546" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">who traveled the lands, spreading good cheer and smiles to all who would listen.</line>
<line start="547" end="600" speaker="dumpington">I just saw a baby chick choke on a worm. They both died!</line>
<line start="601" end="621" speaker="dumpington">Isn't that great?</line>
<line start="622" end="635">Waaaah!</line>
<line start="636" end="716" speaker="dumpington">Oh, I eat squirrels all the time. I made some soup out of the rest of your family just last night!</line>
<line start="717" end="735" speaker="dumpington">Isn't that great?</line>
<line start="736" end="754">Waaaah!</line>
<line start="755" end="804" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">But he wasn't very good at spreading cheer or smiles,</line>
<line start="805" end="846" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">just sadness and misery.</line>
<line start="852" end="942" speaker="dumpington">Fear not, townsfolk! Famine is no doubt right 'round the corner. And gross bugs and rats sleep in our beds!</line>
<line start="943" end="964" speaker="dumpington">Isn't that great?</line>
<line start="965" end="994" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">So one day, the mayor ordered--</line>
<line start="995" end="1010" speaker="coachz" voiceover="voiceover">Oh! I know this part!</line>
<line start="1011" end="1054" speaker="coachz" voiceover="voiceover">Then the mayor ordered the very talented Dancing Brothers</line>
<line start="1055" end="1099">
<sfx>music starts</sfx>
<coachz voiceover="voiceover">to perform at the annual "Rocks and Brown Grass" Festival!</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1100" end="1124" speaker="singers">Gonna have a good time tonight, gonna have a good time tonight!</line>
<line start="1125" end="1152">
<singers>Gonna have a good time tonight, gonna have a good time tonight!</singers>
<coachz voiceover="voiceover">Look at 'em go!</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1153" end="1206">
<singers>Gonna have a good time tonight, gonna have a real good time tonight!</singers>
<coachz voiceover="voiceover">Gonna have a good time tonight, gonna have a good time tonight!</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1207" end="1252">
<sfx>record scratch</sfx>
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">The Dancing Brothers' shoes broke and they stopped dancing immediately!</strongsad>
</line>
<line start="1253" end="1337" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">The mayor then ordered Saddy Dumpington to leave town and never speak to its citizens again.</line>
<line start="1338" end="1395" speaker="dumpington">But, Mr. Mayor, sometimes dogs get so hungry, they eat their own tails!</line>
<line start="1396" end="1406" speaker="dumpington">Isn't that <span style="visibility: hidden">greeeeeeeeaaaaaaatttt!</span></line>
<line start="1407" end="1455" speaker="dumpington">Isn't that greeeeeeeeaaaaaaatttt!</line>
<line start="1459" end="1533" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">So Saddy Dumpington walked through the forest, befriending all manner of critters 'long the way.</line>
<line start="1534" end="1608" speaker="dumpington">Cheer up, Mr Cricket. You have no central nervous system, so it won't hurt when I yank your legs off!</line>
<line start="1609" end="1625" speaker="dumpington">Isn't that great?</line>
<line start="1628" end="1649" speaker="dumpington">Hello, Fox Joe!</line>
<line start="1650" end="1681" speaker="coachz" voiceover="voiceover">Have you met my good friends, the Dancing Brothers?</line>
<line start="1682" end="1729">
<sfx>music starts</sfx>
<coachz voiceover="voiceover">Glenn, Martbell, and the Killer Dynamo!</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1730" end="1776" speaker="singers">Gonna have a good time tonight! Gonna have a good time toni--</line>
<line start="1777" end="1844">
<sfx>record scratch</sfx>
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">No! The Dancing Brothers are allergic to foxes, and they sneeze themselves into comas!</strongsad>
</line>
<line start="1845" end="1866" speaker="coachz" voiceover="voiceover">Oh, jeez, that's harsh!</line>
<line start="1875" end="1928" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Then one day, ol' Dumps here got a message from town!</line>
<line start="1933" end="1974" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">"Saddy, We haven't stopped laughing since you left.</line>
<line start="1975" end="2002" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">"No one can get any work done.</line>
<line start="2003" end="2069" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">"We need you to come say something miserable and depressing so we can have our lives back.</line>
<line start="2070" end="2105" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">"Talk atcha later, The Townsfolk."</line>
<line start="2113" end="2160" speaker="dumpington">Something miserable and depressing? I've never thought of such a thing.</line>
<line start="2161" end="2205" speaker="dumpington">Um, would weird snakes be considered depressing?</line>
<line start="2209" end="2255" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">So he strolled into town, dressed as a weird snake.</line>
<line start="2261" end="2324" speaker="dumpington">I'm a weird, weird snake everyone. My name is Weird Snake Joe!</line>
<line start="2325" end="2354" speaker="dumpington">Isn't that miserable and depressing?</line>
<line start="2360" end="2405" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">But instead of getting depressed, everyone laughed even harder</line>
<line start="2406" end="2452" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">until they passed out for the rest of their lives.</line>
<line start="2456" end="2521" speaker="strongsad">And that brings me to this rope. I'm gonna pass out if I have to climb this rope!</line>
<line start="2524" end="2593" speaker="coachz">Man, Strong Sad, that's a real load right there. A <em>real load!</em></line>
<line start="2594" end="2637" speaker="coachz">That kind of thing might work on Coach X, or Coach Y...</line>
<line start="2638" end="2663" speaker="coachz"><em>But you're dealing with Coach dang Z!</em></line>
<line start="2664" end="2678" speaker="coachz">Now get up that rope!!!</line>
<line start="2679" end="2691" speaker="strongsad">Oooooh!</line>
<line start="2697" end="2732" speaker="coachz">Oh, jeez! I killed the Elephant Man!</line>
<line start="2733" end="2780" speaker="coachz">Oh, this is bad! This is rrrl bad, man!</line>
<line start="2781" end="2827" speaker="coachz">What would the Dancing Brothers do in a sitch'i'ation like this?</line>
<line start="2840" end="2898" speaker="coachz"><em>(singing) Oh, gonna have a good time tonight! Gonna have a good time tonight!</em></line>
<line start="2899" end="2924" speaker="coachz" volume=".8"><em>Gonna have a good time...</em></line>
<line start="2928" end="2953" speaker="strongsad">Works every time!</line>
<line start="2954" end="2997" speaker="singers">Gonna have a real good, good, good, good, good time tonight!</line>
<line start="3025" end="3075" speaker="homsar" sfx="sfx">incomprehensible mumbling</line>
<line start="3089" end="3126" speaker="bubs">What? No! Of course you can't come here!</line>
<line start="3127" end="3169" speaker="bubs">You need to get out of town, man! Lay low for a while!</line>
<line start="3170" end="3215" speaker="bubs">Yeah, all right, all right, you is my dog, too.</line>
<line start="3216" end="3231" speaker="bubs">Now get movin'!</line>
<line start="3232" end="3243" speaker="coachz">Who was that?</line>
<line start="3244" end="3283" speaker="bubs">Ah, that was just Homestar. Now keep outta sight!</line>
<line start="3284" end="3291" speaker="coachz">Dor!</line>
</transcript>