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These are the English subtitles for Where the Crap Are We?. watch this toon To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the All-In-One Greasemonkey script for Firefox or the Homestar All-In-One extension for Chrome. It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on homestarrunner.com and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our local viewer.

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<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="http://www.hrwiki.org/mirror/egg.swf" width="490" height="400">
  <line start="1" end="30" speaker="homestar">Hey Strong Bad, could you give me a hand with this—</line>
  <line start="31" end="57" speaker="strongbad">Wait a minute, shut up. Where the crap <em>are</em> we?</line>
  <line start="58" end="80" speaker="homestar">I dunno. Some place.</line>
  <line start="85" end="137" speaker="strongbad">What are we doing here? It's like we're in Blue Fadey Land or something.</line>
  <line start="140" end="180" speaker="homestar">Um... Maybe this is heaven. We're dead!</line>
  <line start="183" end="220" speaker="strongbad">No, it can't be heaven. There's not enough Twinkies.</line>
  <line start="225" end="238" speaker="homestar">Here's a Twinkie.</line>
  <line start="240" end="265" speaker="strongbad">Oh, maybe this <em>is</em> heaven!</line>
  <line start="270" end="305" speaker="homestar">Yeah, and it's just you and me, forever!</line>
  <line start="310" end="340" speaker="strongbad">Wait a minute! This isn't heaven!</line>
  <line start="350" end="405" speaker="strongbad" volume="2.0">WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!</line>
  <line start="410" end="458" speaker="homestar">No, you're right. I think it's Massachusetts.</line>

  <line start="510" end="550" speaker="homestar">Briiiiing! Briiiiing!</line>
  <line start="557" end="592" speaker="homestar">Hello? Senator Pencilface?</line>
  <line start="593" end="615" speaker="homestar">Yes, this is Homestar.</line>
  <line start="620" end="654" speaker="homestar">Yes, sir! I can save the day!</line>
  <line start="660" end="670" speaker="sfx">click</line>
  <line start="700" end="750" speaker="homestar">Um... I really don't think there's a way out of here.</line>
</transcript>