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These are the English subtitles for The King of Town DVD Commentary. watch this toon To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the All-In-One Greasemonkey script for Firefox or the Homestar All-In-One extension for Chrome. It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on homestarrunner.com and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our local viewer.

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<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="kingcomment.swf" width="550" height="400">
<line start="20" end="72" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Uh, hello and welcome to The King of Town special edition DVD. </line>
<line start="73" end="150" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">I'm your host, America's number one son and sweetheart to all the ladies, Strong Bad. </line>
<line start="151" end="199" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">You're probably wondering what I'm doing the commentary on this cartoon for; </line>
<line start="200" end="240" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">It's because they didn't put me in this freakin' cartoon,</line>
<line start="240" end="279" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">so, the least they could do is let me make fun of it. </line>
<line start="280" end="305" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">So, let's uh, let's begin.</line>
<line start="306" end="349" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Okay, now, this guy does not belong in cartoons. </line>
<line start="350" end="386" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">From what I understand, he's everybody's least favorite character, </line>
<line start="387" end="421" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">And I don't understand how he got his own freakin' cartoon, </line>
<line start="422" end="460" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">And I haven't even got... my own cartoon yet.</line>
<line start="491" end="527" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Oh, and the special effects here; look at that piece of crap! </line>
<line start="528" end="573" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">I mean, I really think that was a piece of crap tied to some strings... </line>
<line start="574" end="608" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">That they just... pulled up behind the mountains, you know...</line>
<line start="661" end="738" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Oh, and here comes mister prancy-time himself, Homestar Runner, to save the day. </line>
<line start="739" end="776" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Personally, I don't know what he's doing not wearing his hat, because, </line>
<line start="777" end="824" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">He looks kinda creepy whe—when he doesn't wear his baseball hat. </line>
<line start="825" end="862" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Or whatever that hat is, you got the propeller on it...</line>
<line start="871" end="898" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">I hate everything about that guy.</line>
<line start="944" end="965" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Oh, now this guy had some class. </line>
<line start="966" end="990" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">The Blacksmith, that guy was a good guy. </line>
<line start="991" end="1050" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">I hung out with him after the cartoon; yeah, we had some good times, I mean.... </line>
<line start="1051" end="1104" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Oh, and this freakin' guy, man, he STANK SO BAD! </line>
<line start="1105" end="1157" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">I mean...you know, I would say that he smelled like crap, but that doesn't go far enough. </line>
<line start="1158" end="1217" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Imagine the worst smell you ever smelled, and pretend <em>that</em> took a crap. </line>
<line start="1218" end="1231" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">That's that guy. </line>
<line start="1232" end="1255" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Oh, and that little guy, ohh!!</line>
<line start="1256" end="1320" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">That guy gave me the creeps... I didn't trust that guy any farther than I could throw him.</line>
<line start="1353" end="1389" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Oh, and Homestar wearing the graduate cap... </line>
<line start="1390" end="1448" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">I'll tell you what, I mean, Homestar never graduated from anything in his life. </line>
<line start="1449" end="1479" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">And, uh, that little X he just made... </line>
<line start="1480" end="1518" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">To tell you the truth, I don't think that he could tell you that it was an X because </line>
<line start="1519" end="1543" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">I'm pretty sure he doesn't know the alphabet </line>
<line start="1544" end="1598" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">And I'm almost positive that he can't read, so. </line>
<line start="1611" end="1663" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Oh yeah, everybody has a good laugh...</line>
<line start="1679" end="1723" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">And that place, the King of Town does not live in that castle! </line>
<line start="1724" end="1739" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">I can tell you that right now. </line>
<line start="1740" end="1795" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">I mean, like, he lives in like some two bedroom job, like, next door to me. </line>
<line start="1796" end="1832" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">It's kinda run down and creepy, actually. </line>
<line start="1833" end="1866" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Yeah, you don't want to go over there, man. </line>
<line start="1879" end="1918" speaker="other">You have no new messages. <span style="visibility:hidden">Ever.</span></line>
<line start="1919" end="1934" speaker="other">You have no new messages. Ever. </line>
<line start="1941" end="1969" speaker="other">Nobody likes you. </line>
<line start="1978" end="2019" speaker="other">You still have zero messages. </line>
<line start="2028" end="2062" speaker="other">You have no friends.</line>
</transcript>