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Pistols For Pandas (organization): Difference between revisions

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''For the [[Toons|toon]], see [[Pistols for Pandas]].''
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<p><i>For the <a href="/index.php?title=Toons" title="Toons">toon</a>, see <a href="/index.php?title=Pistols_for_Pandas" title="Pistols for Pandas">Pistols for Pandas</a>.</i>
</p>
<div class="thumb tleft"><div class="thumbinner" style="width:182px;"><a class="image" href="/index.php?title=File:pistols_for_pandas.png" title="&quot;This good cause is good...'cause!&quot;"><img alt="" border="0" class="thumbimage" height="130" src="https://web.archive.org/web/20211001000000im_/http://www.hrwiki.org/w/images/thumb/4/44/pistols_for_pandas.png/180px-pistols_for_pandas.png" width="180"/></a> <div class="thumbcaption"><div class="magnify"><a class="internal" href="/index.php?title=File:pistols_for_pandas.png" title="Enlarge"><img alt="" height="11" src="https://web.archive.org/web/20211001000000im_/http://www.hrwiki.org/w/skins/common/images/magnify-clip.png" width="15"/></a></div>"This good cause is good...'cause!"</div></div></div>
<div class="thumb tright"><div class="thumbinner" style="width:169px;"><a class="image" href="/index.php?title=File:Pistolsforfigginpandas.png" title="PFP is already in the T-Shirt business!"><img alt="" border="0" class="thumbimage" height="173" src="https://web.archive.org/web/20211001000000im_/http://www.hrwiki.org/w/images/6/6f/Pistolsforfigginpandas.png" width="167"/></a> <div class="thumbcaption"><div class="magnify"><a class="internal" href="/index.php?title=File:Pistolsforfigginpandas.png" title="Enlarge"><img alt="" height="11" src="https://web.archive.org/web/20211001000000im_/http://www.hrwiki.org/w/skins/common/images/magnify-clip.png" width="15"/></a></div>PFP is already in the T-Shirt business!</div></div></div>
<p><b>Pistols For Pandas</b> (or <b>PFP</b>) is a non-profit organization that aims to give <a class="mw-redirect" href="/index.php?title=Pistols" title="Pistols">pistols</a> to <a href="/index.php?title=Bears" title="Bears">pandas</a>. <a href="/index.php?title=Crack_Stuntman" title="Crack Stuntman">Crack Stuntman</a> is the national spokesperson for the group. In <a href="/index.php?title=Marzipan%27s_Answering_Machine_Version_14.2" title="Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 14.2">Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 14.2</a>, Stuntman calls and leaves a message telling <a href="/index.php?title=Marzipan" title="Marzipan">Marzipan</a> to stop protesting at their rallies. In <a href="/index.php?title=Fan_Costumes_%2709" title="Fan Costumes '09">Fan Costumes '09</a>, he says that the work is "court ordered," even though he was clearly being paid when he did a commercial for the organization. He describes pandas as "stupid, fat, slow creatures", saying they "need all the firepower they can get" so that they can protect themselves "when we come clear-cut their bamboo forests and build a five-star resort". PFP claims to have supplied guns to three hundred "underprivileged and unarmed" pandas. The logo shows an angry-looking panda with guns for eyebrows.
</p><p>As explained in the toon <a href="/index.php?title=Pistols_for_Pandas" title="Pistols for Pandas">Pistols for Pandas</a>, for each dollar they receive, they laugh at it (because what good is a dollar going to do?); but for every five-dollar donation received, one box of cereal is bought containing the best prize. Crack Stuntman eats the cereal, plays with the prize, and then removes the box top from the box. When the organization collects enough box tops, Crack dresses up like a fifth grader, takes them to a local school and buys the school a computer. After "charming the horn-rimmed glasses off the media center lady", Crack sneaks out with the computer, takes it to a local pawn shop, and finally exchanges it for pistols, which are dumped into the panda habitat at the local zoo.
</p><p>As of <a href="/index.php?title=Halloween_Safety" title="Halloween Safety">Halloween Safety</a>, <a href="/index.php?title=Crack_Stuntman" title="Crack Stuntman">Crack Stuntman</a> had been fired due to the organization finding out about his line of frozen panda-burger patties.
</p>
<a id="Appearances" name="Appearances"></a><h2> <span class="mw-headline">Appearances</span></h2>
<ul><li><b>Debut:</b> <a href="/index.php?title=Marzipan%27s_Answering_Machine_Version_14.2" title="Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 14.2">Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 14.2</a> (mentioned)
</li><li><a href="/index.php?title=An_Important_Rap_Song" title="An Important Rap Song">An Important Rap Song</a> (logo)
</li><li><a href="/index.php?title=Punkin_Stencils" title="Punkin Stencils">Halloween Stencils</a>
</li><li><a href="/index.php?title=Pistols_for_Pandas" title="Pistols for Pandas">Pistols for Pandas</a>
</li><li><a href="/index.php?title=Fan_Costumes_%2709" title="Fan Costumes '09">Fan Costumes '09</a>
</li><li><a href="/index.php?title=Halloween_Safety" title="Halloween Safety">Halloween Safety</a> (mentioned)
</li></ul>


https://web.archive.org/web/20211001000000im_/http://www.hrwiki.org/w/images/thumb/4/44/pistols_for_pandas.png/180px-pistols_for_pandas.png


''"This good cause is good...'cause!"''


https://web.archive.org/web/20211001000000im_/http://www.hrwiki.org/w/images/6/6f/Pistolsforfigginpandas.png
 
<div class="visualClear"></div>
''PFP is already in the T-Shirt business!''
</html>
 
'''Pistols For Pandas''' (or '''PFP''') is a non-profit organization that aims to give [[Pistols|pistols]] to [[Bears|pandas]]. [[Crack Stuntman]] is the national spokesperson for the group. In [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 14.2]], Stuntman calls and leaves a message telling [[Marzipan]] to stop protesting at their rallies. In [[Fan Costumes '09]], he says that the work is "court ordered," even though he was clearly being paid when he did a commercial for the organization. He describes pandas as "stupid, fat, slow creatures", saying they "need all the firepower they can get" so that they can protect themselves "when we come clear-cut their bamboo forests and build a five-star resort". PFP claims to have supplied guns to three hundred "underprivileged and unarmed" pandas. The logo shows an angry-looking panda with guns for eyebrows.
 
As explained in the toon [[Pistols for Pandas]], for each dollar they receive, they laugh at it (because what good is a dollar going to do?); but for every five-dollar donation received, one box of cereal is bought containing the best prize. Crack Stuntman eats the cereal, plays with the prize, and then removes the box top from the box. When the organization collects enough box tops, Crack dresses up like a fifth grader, takes them to a local school and buys the school a computer. After "charming the horn-rimmed glasses off the media center lady", Crack sneaks out with the computer, takes it to a local pawn shop, and finally exchanges it for pistols, which are dumped into the panda habitat at the local zoo.
 
As of [[Halloween Safety]], [[Crack Stuntman]] had been fired due to the organization finding out about his line of frozen panda-burger patties.
 
== Appearances ==
 
* '''Debut:''' [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 14.2]] (mentioned)
* [[An Important Rap Song]] (logo)
* [[Punkin Stencils|Halloween Stencils]]
* [[Pistols for Pandas]]
* [[Fan Costumes '09]]
* [[Halloween Safety]] (mentioned)
[[Category:Organizations]]


Latest revision as of 21:00, 18 July 2026

For the toon, see Pistols for Pandas.

"This good cause is good...'cause!"
PFP is already in the T-Shirt business!

Pistols For Pandas (or PFP) is a non-profit organization that aims to give pistols to pandas. Crack Stuntman is the national spokesperson for the group. In Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 14.2, Stuntman calls and leaves a message telling Marzipan to stop protesting at their rallies. In Fan Costumes '09, he says that the work is "court ordered," even though he was clearly being paid when he did a commercial for the organization. He describes pandas as "stupid, fat, slow creatures", saying they "need all the firepower they can get" so that they can protect themselves "when we come clear-cut their bamboo forests and build a five-star resort". PFP claims to have supplied guns to three hundred "underprivileged and unarmed" pandas. The logo shows an angry-looking panda with guns for eyebrows.

As explained in the toon Pistols for Pandas, for each dollar they receive, they laugh at it (because what good is a dollar going to do?); but for every five-dollar donation received, one box of cereal is bought containing the best prize. Crack Stuntman eats the cereal, plays with the prize, and then removes the box top from the box. When the organization collects enough box tops, Crack dresses up like a fifth grader, takes them to a local school and buys the school a computer. After "charming the horn-rimmed glasses off the media center lady", Crack sneaks out with the computer, takes it to a local pawn shop, and finally exchanges it for pistols, which are dumped into the panda habitat at the local zoo.

As of Halloween Safety, Crack Stuntman had been fired due to the organization finding out about his line of frozen panda-burger patties.

Appearances

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