Odd Marriages

"I now pronounce you man and pleasant odor."

Many characters in Free Country, USA appear to have married inanimate objects, animals, or other odd things. Whether they are actually married is usually uncertain.

Appearances

• Email secret recipes — Tuxworth tells Caleb Rentpayer that he can't marry his guitar. Caleb responds that he can try.
• Happy Fireworks — Coach Z tries to tell Bubs that he married an M-300 class firework.
• The King of Town's Very Own Quite Popular Cartoon Show — The Poopsmith tries to marry a batch of roses, but when he tries to kiss them, they wilt suddenly.
• Email the paper — In the DVD commentary, Strong Bad says that The Paper's return in email thunder was a "sham marriage". What the marriage was to is unknown.
• Trogday 08 — Coach Z says that Wormdingler doesn't need any consummate V's to be his bride. He then displays great shame at saying this aloud.
• Play Date — The King of Town celebrates his 50th anniversary with Brunswick Stew, calling it "the dollop of sour cream year".
• Homestar Ruiner — The King of Town ends up trapped in a loveless marriage to the queen of the mole people.
• Strong Bad Classics! — In the original version of the book, the Porridge Maiden asks a string of eligible bachelors to marry her, but each of them claims to be married to his job, and in the end the Porridge Maiden ends up marrying Death. In Strong Bad's version of the story, the Lum Swooper is married to a lamp.
• Later That Night... — Homestar mentions that the characters had attended "the delightful wedding of The Goblin and the Jibblies Painting".
• Haunted Photo Booth — Jaundiced Jerry and Stabby Gabby, two urban legend-type monsters Strong Bad summons for photographs, are wed by the Rocoulm in the Jibblies Painting in an Easter egg at the end.