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| https://web.archive.org/web/20211001000000im_/http://www.hrwiki.org/w/images/thumb/4/41/Subtitles_Project_Logo.png/80px-Subtitles_Project_Logo.png'''WM0'''
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'''These are the [[English language|English]] subtitles for [[what i want]].''' [https://homestarrunner.com/sbemail163.html watch this toon]
'''[[HRWiki:Subtitles|HRWikiSubtitlesProject]]'''
To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the '''[[User:Phlip/Greasemonkey|All-In-One Greasemonkey script]]''' for Firefox or the '''[https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/homestar-all-in-one/ekecfcebbojjfaiendgjgcadampmppdb Homestar All-In-One extension]''' for Chrome.<br />It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on [https://homestarrunner.com/ homestarrunner.com] and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our [http://subtitles.hrwiki.org/sbemail163/en local viewer].
 
</div>
| '''These are the [[English language|English]] subtitles for [[what i want]].''' <span class="hovul" style="font-size:smaller;background:#EEE;border:1px #999 solid;padding:2px;margin-left:6px;white-space:nowrap">[https://homestarrunner.com/sbemail163.html watch this toon]</span>
<div style="font-size:90%">
 
To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the '''[[User:Phlip/Greasemonkey|All-In-One Greasemonkey script]]''' for Firefox or the '''[https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/homestar-all-in-one/ekecfcebbojjfaiendgjgcadampmppdb Homestar All-In-One extension]''' for Chrome.<br />
It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on [https://homestarrunner.com/ homestarrunner.com] and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our [http://subtitles.hrwiki.org/sbemail163/en local viewer].
 
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<div class="hovul" style="font-size:70%; text-align:right;">
'''en''' 
 
[[Subtitles:sbemail163/de|de]] 
'''en'''  [[Subtitles:sbemail163/de|de]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail163/he|he]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail163/es|es]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail163/fr|fr]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail163/nl|nl]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail163/fi|fi]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail163/pl|pl]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail163/pt-br|pt-br]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail163/tr|tr]]
[[Subtitles:sbemail163/he|he]] 
 
[[Subtitles:sbemail163/es|es]] 
</div>
[[Subtitles:sbemail163/fr|fr]] 
<pre>&lt;?xml version=&quot;1.0&quot; encoding=&quot;utf-8&quot;?&gt;
[[Subtitles:sbemail163/nl|nl]] 
&lt;transcript xml:lang=&quot;en-us&quot; file=&quot;sbemail163.swf&quot; width=&quot;550&quot; height=&quot;400&quot;&gt;
[[Subtitles:sbemail163/fi|fi]] 
&lt;line start=&quot;16&quot; end=&quot;45&quot;&gt;&lt;strongbad&gt;&lt;em&gt;(singing)&lt;/em&gt; Ding-ding-dong, ding-ding-dong, ding-ding-&lt;/strongbad&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
[[Subtitles:sbemail163/pl|pl]] 
&lt;line start=&quot;45&quot; end=&quot;62&quot;&gt;&lt;strongbad&gt;&quot;Dear Strong Baaad.&quot;&lt;/strongbad&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
[[Subtitles:sbemail163/pt-br|pt-br]] 
&lt;line start=&quot;63&quot; end=&quot;90&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;&quot;What do you want for Decemberween?&quot;&lt;/line&gt;
[[Subtitles:sbemail163/tr|tr]]
&lt;line start=&quot;91&quot; end=&quot;111&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;&quot;your holiday spirit&quot;&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;112&quot; end=&quot;139&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;&quot;Talon Jen-d-dro&quot;&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;140&quot; end=&quot;161&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Where'd you get that name?&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;162&quot; end=&quot;185&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;George Lucas?&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;186&quot; end=&quot;267&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Ta'lon J'en-dr'o from the computery generated planet of Des' Moi-nes'ia.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;268&quot; end=&quot;319&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Anyways, everybody knows the kind of stuff I want, &lt;em&gt;Ta&lt;/em&gt;'lon.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;320&quot; end=&quot;355&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;A catapult that launches balls of cobras,&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;356&quot; end=&quot;377&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;a chainsaw car,&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;378&quot; end=&quot;409&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;a subscription to EGM2,&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;410&quot; end=&quot;430&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;a hot step-sister.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;431&quot; end=&quot;455&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;That email writes itself.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;456&quot; end=&quot;514&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;It's more important that I establish what I &lt;em&gt;don't&lt;/em&gt; want for Decemberween.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;515&quot; end=&quot;581&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;Our first item is a perennial all-star of bad awful Decemberween presents:&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;582&quot; end=&quot;601&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;the ornament.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;602&quot; end=&quot;645&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;There's no better way to say, &quot;I have no idea what your interests are&quot;&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;646&quot; end=&quot;695&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;than to give someone a present that ceases to be useful the moment it's opened.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;696&quot; end=&quot;775&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Yes, there's nothing like opening a gift just in time to put it in a box in the attic for a year.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;776&quot; end=&quot;821&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;And next Decemberween when you get it back out, guess what?&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;822&quot; end=&quot;868&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;It's still just a cool snowman surfing the internet.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;869&quot; end=&quot;899&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;Internet is &lt;strong&gt;so&lt;/strong&gt; hot this year.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;900&quot; end=&quot;914&quot; sfx=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;phone ringing&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;915&quot; end=&quot;932&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Oh, we got a caller.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;933&quot; end=&quot;1003&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Go ahead, caller. How many F-R-one-one-four-P-dash-D-C-eights should I put you down for?&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1004&quot; end=&quot;1069&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; volume=&quot;0.9&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;Strong Bad, did you put wildebeest pheromones in my laundry again?&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1070&quot; end=&quot;1090&quot;&gt;&lt;sfx volume=&quot;0.9&quot;&gt;wildebeest noises&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;strongsad volume=&quot;0.9&quot;&gt;Auugh!&lt;/strongsad&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1092&quot; end=&quot;1105&quot; sfx=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;dial tone&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1106&quot; end=&quot;1141&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Another satisfied customer.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1142&quot; end=&quot;1194&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Next up, we have one of those mechanical dancing musical nobots.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1195&quot; end=&quot;1242&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;The kind that you accidentally activate by getting too close.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1243&quot; end=&quot;1300&quot;&gt;&lt;strongbad&gt;&lt;em&gt;(heavily distorted music and singing)&lt;/em&gt; I'm like come on Fhqwhgads, I said come on Fhqwhgads,&lt;/strongbad&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1300&quot; end=&quot;1322&quot;&gt;&lt;strongbad&gt;Everybody to the limit, The Cheat is to the limit.&lt;/strongbad&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1323&quot; end=&quot;1374&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;Listen to that moldy oldy in glorious drive-thru stereo.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1375&quot; end=&quot;1403&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Who can appreciate the song when all you're &lt;em&gt;really&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1404&quot; end=&quot;1445&quot;&gt;&lt;sfx&gt;grinding&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;strongbad voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;hearing are the plastic gears and motors clacking together&lt;/strongbad&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1445&quot; end=&quot;1497&quot;&gt;&lt;sfx&gt;grinding&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;strongbad voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;in an effort to barely bust some sort of move.&lt;/strongbad&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1498&quot; end=&quot;1549&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;These things just scream &quot;I stopped at the drug store on my way over&quot;.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1550&quot; end=&quot;1587&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;Now, on to our next item.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1588&quot; end=&quot;1610&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;Uhh, Strong Bad?&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1611&quot; end=&quot;1670&quot;&gt;&lt;strongbad&gt;Sorry, I'm completely entrangled by those hypnotically swaying hips.&lt;/strongbad&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1670&quot; end=&quot;1694&quot;&gt;&lt;sfx&gt;grinding&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;strongbad&gt;Sorry, I'm completely entrangled by those hypnotically swaying hips.&lt;/strongbad&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1695&quot; end=&quot;1710&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot; sfx=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;aiy-aiy-aiy-aiy-aiy&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1711&quot; end=&quot;1779&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Our last gift items are all about the false notion that just because you made something yourself,&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1780&quot; end=&quot;1803&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;it's not a worthless piece of crap.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1804&quot; end=&quot;1863&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;These sea-shells have office supplies hot-glued to them for absolutely no reason.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1864&quot; end=&quot;1935&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;Yes, and the more globs of hot glue I can see, the quicker I throw it in the trash.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1936&quot; end=&quot;1985&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;This clothes-pin reindeer ornament is forgettably precious.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1986&quot; end=&quot;1993&quot;&gt;&lt;sfx&gt;record scratches&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;strongbad&gt;Whoa!&lt;/strongbad&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1993&quot; end=&quot;2015&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;home-made &lt;em&gt;and&lt;/em&gt; an ornament!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2020&quot; end=&quot;2050&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;That thing is an anti-gift.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2050&quot; end=&quot;2112&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;If someone gives you one of &lt;em&gt;those&lt;/em&gt;, you actually have to &lt;em&gt;pay them&lt;/em&gt; because it's so poor.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2113&quot; end=&quot;2142&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Uh, probably because they're so poor.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2143&quot; end=&quot;2147&quot; sfx=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;white noise&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2147&quot; end=&quot;2189&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;So Ta'lon, my young apprentice, there's my&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2190&quot; end=&quot;2239&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;&quot;Please Great Aunt Whoever, Don't Get Me This Stuff For Decemberween&quot; &lt;span style=&quot;visibility: hidden&quot;&gt;list.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2239&quot; end=&quot;2250&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;&quot;Please Great Aunt Whoever, Don't Get Me This Stuff For Decemberween&quot; list.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2251&quot; end=&quot;2275&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;I highly suggest you make your own.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2276&quot; end=&quot;2294&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;But if it doesn't work,&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2295&quot; end=&quot;2359&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;don't forget to take advantage of all the temporary help that retailers hire this time of year.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2360&quot; end=&quot;2390&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Those people will refund &lt;em&gt;anything&lt;/em&gt;!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2391&quot; end=&quot;2456&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Last year, I returned an omelette to a hardware store for nigh on fifty bucks.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2457&quot; end=&quot;2497&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Well, Happy Decemberween everybloody!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2498&quot; end=&quot;2509&quot; sfx=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;Geddup noise&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2510&quot; end=&quot;2521&quot; speaker=&quot;thepaper&quot;&gt;Preeeow!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2534&quot; end=&quot;2634&quot;&gt;&lt;singers&gt;&lt;em&gt;(heavily distorted music and singing)&lt;/em&gt; Everybody! Everybody! Everybody! Everybody!&lt;/singers&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;/transcript&gt;</pre>
<div id="catlinks" class="catlinks">
 
<div id="mw-normal-catlinks">
 
[/wiki/Special:Categories Category]: <span dir="ltr">[[Category:English Subtitles|English Subtitles]]</span>
 
</div>


</div>
<pre>
<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="sbemail163.swf" width="550" height="400">
<line start="16" end="45"><strongbad><em>(singing)</em> Ding-ding-dong, ding-ding-dong, ding-ding-</strongbad></line>
<line start="45" end="62"><strongbad>"Dear Strong Baaad."</strongbad></line>
<line start="63" end="90" speaker="strongbad">"What do you want for Decemberween?"</line>
<line start="91" end="111" speaker="strongbad">"your holiday spirit"</line>
<line start="112" end="139" speaker="strongbad">"Talon Jen-d-dro"</line>
<line start="140" end="161" speaker="strongbad">Where'd you get that name?</line>
<line start="162" end="185" speaker="strongbad">George Lucas?</line>
<line start="186" end="267" speaker="strongbad">Ta'lon J'en-dr'o from the computery generated planet of Des' Moi-nes'ia.</line>
<line start="268" end="319" speaker="strongbad">Anyways, everybody knows the kind of stuff I want, <em>Ta</em>'lon.</line>
<line start="320" end="355" speaker="strongbad">A catapult that launches balls of cobras,</line>
<line start="356" end="377" speaker="strongbad">a chainsaw car,</line>
<line start="378" end="409" speaker="strongbad">a subscription to EGM2,</line>
<line start="410" end="430" speaker="strongbad">a hot step-sister.</line>
<line start="431" end="455" speaker="strongbad">That email writes itself.</line>
<line start="456" end="514" speaker="strongbad">It's more important that I establish what I <em>don't</em> want for Decemberween.</line>
<line start="515" end="581" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">Our first item is a perennial all-star of bad awful Decemberween presents:</line>
<line start="582" end="601" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">the ornament.</line>
<line start="602" end="645" speaker="marzipan">There's no better way to say, "I have no idea what your interests are"</line>
<line start="646" end="695" speaker="marzipan">than to give someone a present that ceases to be useful the moment it's opened.</line>
<line start="696" end="775" speaker="strongbad">Yes, there's nothing like opening a gift just in time to put it in a box in the attic for a year.</line>
<line start="776" end="821" speaker="strongbad">And next Decemberween when you get it back out, guess what?</line>
<line start="822" end="868" speaker="strongbad">It's still just a cool snowman surfing the internet.</line>
<line start="869" end="899" speaker="marzipan" voiceover="yes">Internet is <strong>so</strong> hot this year.</line>
<line start="900" end="914" sfx="yes">phone ringing</line>
<line start="915" end="932" speaker="strongbad">Oh, we got a caller.</line>
<line start="933" end="1003" speaker="strongbad">Go ahead, caller. How many F-R-one-one-four-P-dash-D-C-eights should I put you down for?</line>
<line start="1004" end="1069" speaker="strongsad" volume="0.9" voiceover="yes">Strong Bad, did you put wildebeest pheromones in my laundry again?</line>
<line start="1070" end="1090"><sfx volume="0.9">wildebeest noises</sfx><strongsad volume="0.9">Auugh!</strongsad></line>
<line start="1092" end="1105" sfx="yes">dial tone</line>
<line start="1106" end="1141" speaker="strongbad">Another satisfied customer.</line>
<line start="1142" end="1194" speaker="strongbad">Next up, we have one of those mechanical dancing musical nobots.</line>
<line start="1195" end="1242" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">The kind that you accidentally activate by getting too close.</line>
<line start="1243" end="1300"><strongbad><em>(heavily distorted music and singing)</em> I'm like come on Fhqwhgads, I said come on Fhqwhgads,</strongbad></line>
<line start="1300" end="1322"><strongbad>Everybody to the limit, The Cheat is to the limit.</strongbad></line>
<line start="1323" end="1374" speaker="marzipan">Listen to that moldy oldy in glorious drive-thru stereo.</line>
<line start="1375" end="1403" speaker="strongbad">Who can appreciate the song when all you're <em>really</em></line>
<line start="1404" end="1445"><sfx>grinding</sfx><strongbad voiceover="yes">hearing are the plastic gears and motors clacking together</strongbad></line>
<line start="1445" end="1497"><sfx>grinding</sfx><strongbad voiceover="yes">in an effort to barely bust some sort of move.</strongbad></line>
<line start="1498" end="1549" speaker="marzipan">These things just scream "I stopped at the drug store on my way over".</line>
<line start="1550" end="1587" speaker="marzipan">Now, on to our next item.</line>
<line start="1588" end="1610" speaker="marzipan">Uhh, Strong Bad?</line>
<line start="1611" end="1670"><strongbad>Sorry, I'm completely entrangled by those hypnotically swaying hips.</strongbad></line>
<line start="1670" end="1694"><sfx>grinding</sfx><strongbad>Sorry, I'm completely entrangled by those hypnotically swaying hips.</strongbad></line>
<line start="1695" end="1710" speaker="strongbad" sfx="yes">aiy-aiy-aiy-aiy-aiy</line>
<line start="1711" end="1779" speaker="strongbad">Our last gift items are all about the false notion that just because you made something yourself,</line>
<line start="1780" end="1803" speaker="strongbad">it's not a worthless piece of crap.</line>
<line start="1804" end="1863" speaker="marzipan">These sea-shells have office supplies hot-glued to them for absolutely no reason.</line>
<line start="1864" end="1935" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">Yes, and the more globs of hot glue I can see, the quicker I throw it in the trash.</line>
<line start="1936" end="1985" speaker="marzipan" voiceover="yes">This clothes-pin reindeer ornament is forgettably precious.</line>
<line start="1986" end="1993"><sfx>record scratches</sfx><strongbad>Whoa!</strongbad></line>
<line start="1993" end="2015" speaker="strongbad">home-made <em>and</em> an ornament!</line>
<line start="2020" end="2050" speaker="strongbad">That thing is an anti-gift.</line>
<line start="2050" end="2112" speaker="strongbad">If someone gives you one of <em>those</em>, you actually have to <em>pay them</em> because it's so poor.</line>
<line start="2113" end="2142" speaker="strongbad">Uh, probably because they're so poor.</line>
<line start="2143" end="2147" sfx="yes">white noise</line>
<line start="2147" end="2189" speaker="strongbad">So Ta'lon, my young apprentice, there's my</line>
<line start="2190" end="2239" speaker="strongbad">"Please Great Aunt Whoever, Don't Get Me This Stuff For Decemberween" <span style="visibility: hidden">list.</span></line>
<line start="2239" end="2250" speaker="strongbad">"Please Great Aunt Whoever, Don't Get Me This Stuff For Decemberween" list.</line>
<line start="2251" end="2275" speaker="strongbad">I highly suggest you make your own.</line>
<line start="2276" end="2294" speaker="strongbad">But if it doesn't work,</line>
<line start="2295" end="2359" speaker="strongbad">don't forget to take advantage of all the temporary help that retailers hire this time of year.</line>
<line start="2360" end="2390" speaker="strongbad">Those people will refund <em>anything</em>!</line>
<line start="2391" end="2456" speaker="strongbad">Last year, I returned an omelette to a hardware store for nigh on fifty bucks.</line>
<line start="2457" end="2497" speaker="strongbad">Well, Happy Decemberween everybloody!</line>
<line start="2498" end="2509" sfx="yes">Geddup noise</line>
<line start="2510" end="2521" speaker="thepaper">Preeeow!</line>
<line start="2534" end="2634"><singers><em>(heavily distorted music and singing)</em> Everybody! Everybody! Everybody! Everybody!</singers></line>
</transcript>
</pre>
[[Category:English Subtitles]]


Latest revision as of 14:24, 14 July 2026

80px-Subtitles_Project_Logo.pngWM0

These are the English subtitles for what i want. watch this toon To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the All-In-One Greasemonkey script for Firefox or the Homestar All-In-One extension for Chrome.
It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on homestarrunner.com and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our local viewer.

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<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="sbemail163.swf" width="550" height="400">
<line start="16" end="45"><strongbad><em>(singing)</em> Ding-ding-dong, ding-ding-dong, ding-ding-</strongbad></line>
<line start="45" end="62"><strongbad>"Dear Strong Baaad."</strongbad></line>
<line start="63" end="90" speaker="strongbad">"What do you want for Decemberween?"</line>
<line start="91" end="111" speaker="strongbad">"your holiday spirit"</line>
<line start="112" end="139" speaker="strongbad">"Talon Jen-d-dro"</line>
<line start="140" end="161" speaker="strongbad">Where'd you get that name?</line>
<line start="162" end="185" speaker="strongbad">George Lucas?</line>
<line start="186" end="267" speaker="strongbad">Ta'lon J'en-dr'o from the computery generated planet of Des' Moi-nes'ia.</line>
<line start="268" end="319" speaker="strongbad">Anyways, everybody knows the kind of stuff I want, <em>Ta</em>'lon.</line>
<line start="320" end="355" speaker="strongbad">A catapult that launches balls of cobras,</line>
<line start="356" end="377" speaker="strongbad">a chainsaw car,</line>
<line start="378" end="409" speaker="strongbad">a subscription to EGM2,</line>
<line start="410" end="430" speaker="strongbad">a hot step-sister.</line>
<line start="431" end="455" speaker="strongbad">That email writes itself.</line>
<line start="456" end="514" speaker="strongbad">It's more important that I establish what I <em>don't</em> want for Decemberween.</line>
<line start="515" end="581" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">Our first item is a perennial all-star of bad awful Decemberween presents:</line>
<line start="582" end="601" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">the ornament.</line>
<line start="602" end="645" speaker="marzipan">There's no better way to say, "I have no idea what your interests are"</line>
<line start="646" end="695" speaker="marzipan">than to give someone a present that ceases to be useful the moment it's opened.</line>
<line start="696" end="775" speaker="strongbad">Yes, there's nothing like opening a gift just in time to put it in a box in the attic for a year.</line>
<line start="776" end="821" speaker="strongbad">And next Decemberween when you get it back out, guess what?</line>
<line start="822" end="868" speaker="strongbad">It's still just a cool snowman surfing the internet.</line>
<line start="869" end="899" speaker="marzipan" voiceover="yes">Internet is <strong>so</strong> hot this year.</line>
<line start="900" end="914" sfx="yes">phone ringing</line>
<line start="915" end="932" speaker="strongbad">Oh, we got a caller.</line>
<line start="933" end="1003" speaker="strongbad">Go ahead, caller. How many F-R-one-one-four-P-dash-D-C-eights should I put you down for?</line>
<line start="1004" end="1069" speaker="strongsad" volume="0.9" voiceover="yes">Strong Bad, did you put wildebeest pheromones in my laundry again?</line>
<line start="1070" end="1090"><sfx volume="0.9">wildebeest noises</sfx><strongsad volume="0.9">Auugh!</strongsad></line> 
<line start="1092" end="1105" sfx="yes">dial tone</line>
<line start="1106" end="1141" speaker="strongbad">Another satisfied customer.</line>
<line start="1142" end="1194" speaker="strongbad">Next up, we have one of those mechanical dancing musical nobots.</line>
<line start="1195" end="1242" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">The kind that you accidentally activate by getting too close.</line>
<line start="1243" end="1300"><strongbad><em>(heavily distorted music and singing)</em> I'm like come on Fhqwhgads, I said come on Fhqwhgads,</strongbad></line>
<line start="1300" end="1322"><strongbad>Everybody to the limit, The Cheat is to the limit.</strongbad></line>
<line start="1323" end="1374" speaker="marzipan">Listen to that moldy oldy in glorious drive-thru stereo.</line>
<line start="1375" end="1403" speaker="strongbad">Who can appreciate the song when all you're <em>really</em></line>
<line start="1404" end="1445"><sfx>grinding</sfx><strongbad voiceover="yes">hearing are the plastic gears and motors clacking together</strongbad></line>
<line start="1445" end="1497"><sfx>grinding</sfx><strongbad voiceover="yes">in an effort to barely bust some sort of move.</strongbad></line>
<line start="1498" end="1549" speaker="marzipan">These things just scream "I stopped at the drug store on my way over".</line>
<line start="1550" end="1587" speaker="marzipan">Now, on to our next item.</line>
<line start="1588" end="1610" speaker="marzipan">Uhh, Strong Bad?</line>
<line start="1611" end="1670"><strongbad>Sorry, I'm completely entrangled by those hypnotically swaying hips.</strongbad></line> 
<line start="1670" end="1694"><sfx>grinding</sfx><strongbad>Sorry, I'm completely entrangled by those hypnotically swaying hips.</strongbad></line>
<line start="1695" end="1710" speaker="strongbad" sfx="yes">aiy-aiy-aiy-aiy-aiy</line>
<line start="1711" end="1779" speaker="strongbad">Our last gift items are all about the false notion that just because you made something yourself,</line>
<line start="1780" end="1803" speaker="strongbad">it's not a worthless piece of crap.</line>
<line start="1804" end="1863" speaker="marzipan">These sea-shells have office supplies hot-glued to them for absolutely no reason.</line>
<line start="1864" end="1935" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">Yes, and the more globs of hot glue I can see, the quicker I throw it in the trash.</line>
<line start="1936" end="1985" speaker="marzipan" voiceover="yes">This clothes-pin reindeer ornament is forgettably precious.</line>
<line start="1986" end="1993"><sfx>record scratches</sfx><strongbad>Whoa!</strongbad></line> 
<line start="1993" end="2015" speaker="strongbad">home-made <em>and</em> an ornament!</line>
<line start="2020" end="2050" speaker="strongbad">That thing is an anti-gift.</line>
<line start="2050" end="2112" speaker="strongbad">If someone gives you one of <em>those</em>, you actually have to <em>pay them</em> because it's so poor.</line>
<line start="2113" end="2142" speaker="strongbad">Uh, probably because they're so poor.</line>
<line start="2143" end="2147" sfx="yes">white noise</line>
<line start="2147" end="2189" speaker="strongbad">So Ta'lon, my young apprentice, there's my</line>
<line start="2190" end="2239" speaker="strongbad">"Please Great Aunt Whoever, Don't Get Me This Stuff For Decemberween" <span style="visibility: hidden">list.</span></line>
<line start="2239" end="2250" speaker="strongbad">"Please Great Aunt Whoever, Don't Get Me This Stuff For Decemberween" list.</line>
<line start="2251" end="2275" speaker="strongbad">I highly suggest you make your own.</line>
<line start="2276" end="2294" speaker="strongbad">But if it doesn't work,</line>
<line start="2295" end="2359" speaker="strongbad">don't forget to take advantage of all the temporary help that retailers hire this time of year.</line>
<line start="2360" end="2390" speaker="strongbad">Those people will refund <em>anything</em>!</line>
<line start="2391" end="2456" speaker="strongbad">Last year, I returned an omelette to a hardware store for nigh on fifty bucks.</line>
<line start="2457" end="2497" speaker="strongbad">Well, Happy Decemberween everybloody!</line>
<line start="2498" end="2509" sfx="yes">Geddup noise</line>
<line start="2510" end="2521" speaker="thepaper">Preeeow!</line>
<line start="2534" end="2634"><singers><em>(heavily distorted music and singing)</em> Everybody! Everybody! Everybody! Everybody!</singers></line>
</transcript>
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