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'''These are the [[English language|English]] subtitles for [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 16.2]].''' [https://homestarrunner.com/answer16.html watch this toon]
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| '''These are the [[English language|English]] subtitles for [[Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 16.2]].''' <span class="hovul" style="font-size:smaller;background:#EEE;border:1px #999 solid;padding:2px;margin-left:6px;white-space:nowrap">[https://homestarrunner.com/answer16.html watch this toon]</span>
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It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on [https://homestarrunner.com/ homestarrunner.com] and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our [http://subtitles.hrwiki.org/answer16/en local viewer].
 
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<div class="hovul" style="font-size:70%; text-align:right;">
'''en''' 
 
[[Subtitles:answer16/de|de]] 
'''en'''  [[Subtitles:answer16/de|de]]  [[Subtitles:answer16/he|he]]  [[Subtitles:answer16/es|es]]  [[Subtitles:answer16/fr|fr]]  [[Subtitles:answer16/nl|nl]]  [[Subtitles:answer16/fi|fi]]  [[Subtitles:answer16/pl|pl]]  [[Subtitles:answer16/pt-br|pt-br]]  [[Subtitles:answer16/tr|tr]]
[[Subtitles:answer16/he|he]] 
 
[[Subtitles:answer16/es|es]] 
</div>
[[Subtitles:answer16/fr|fr]] 
<pre>&lt;?xml version=&quot;1.0&quot; encoding=&quot;utf-8&quot;?&gt;
[[Subtitles:answer16/nl|nl]] 
&lt;transcript xml:lang=&quot;en-us&quot; file=&quot;answer16.swf&quot; width=&quot;550&quot; height=&quot;400&quot;&gt;
[[Subtitles:answer16/fi|fi]] 
  &lt;line start=&quot;11&quot; end=&quot;27&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;Hi, this is Marzipan.&lt;/line&gt;
[[Subtitles:answer16/pl|pl]] 
  &lt;line start=&quot;28&quot; end=&quot;92&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;I'm off volunteering in the Coches Mountains, teaching the heathens how to bend pipe cleaners.&lt;/line&gt;
[[Subtitles:answer16/pt-br|pt-br]] 
  &lt;line start=&quot;93&quot; end=&quot;100&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;I'll be back in-&lt;/line&gt;
[[Subtitles:answer16/tr|tr]]
  &lt;line start=&quot;101&quot; end=&quot;105&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;beep&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;106&quot; end=&quot;124&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Sorry, Marzy.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;125&quot; end=&quot;170&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Time to exercise one of my favorite perks of house-sitting!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;171&quot; end=&quot;176&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;beep&lt;/line&gt;
 
  &lt;line start=&quot;183&quot; end=&quot;216&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Grrrreetings weary telephone traveler.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;217&quot; end=&quot;284&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;I sense you have come in search of Marzipan, but you have stumbled upon so much more.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;285&quot; end=&quot;332&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;'Tis I, Strong Sad, house-sitter extraordinaire.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;333&quot; end=&quot;397&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Please organize your thoughts for Marzipan in order of least depressing to most depressing.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;398&quot; end=&quot;442&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;As for crank calls, allow me to give you a theme:&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;443&quot; end=&quot;470&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;furtive glances.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;471&quot; end=&quot;475&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;beep&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;476&quot; end=&quot;501&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Ugh, too verbose.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;502&quot; end=&quot;530&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Come on, Sads, quick and to the point!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;531&quot; end=&quot;548&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;In and out! Hook 'em and cook 'em!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;549&quot; end=&quot;555&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;beep&lt;/line&gt;
 
  &lt;line start=&quot;562&quot; end=&quot;591&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Marzipan be gone! Strong Sad be here,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;592&quot; end=&quot;619&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;so drop your purpose in mine ear!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;620&quot; end=&quot;648&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;I'll pass it on before too long—&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;649&quot; end=&quot;653&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;beep&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;654&quot; end=&quot;671&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Let's pretend that never happened.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;672&quot; end=&quot;680&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;beep&lt;/line&gt;
 
  &lt;line start=&quot;687&quot; end=&quot;750&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Hello, this is Strong Sad, temporary steward of Marzipan's domicile.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;751&quot; end=&quot;783&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Please leave your jumbled message at the tone,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;784&quot; end=&quot;861&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;so I can articulately reword it in journal form for Marzipan to read upon her safe return.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;862&quot; end=&quot;867&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;beep&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;868&quot; end=&quot;896&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Good enough for guv'ent work I say.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;897&quot; end=&quot;907&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;beep&lt;/line&gt;


  &lt;line start=&quot;912&quot; end=&quot;969&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Wait, what? Hold on, I wasn't prepared for this. Just gimme a sec.&lt;/line&gt;
<pre>
  &lt;line start=&quot;970&quot; end=&quot;1009&quot;&gt;&lt;sfx volume=&quot;0.7&quot;&gt;writing noises&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;strongbad volume=&quot;0.7&quot; sfx=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;mumbling noises&lt;/strongbad&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
  &lt;line start=&quot;1010&quot; end=&quot;1025&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Okay, I'm ready.&lt;/line&gt;
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="answer16.swf" width="550" height="400">
  &lt;line start=&quot;1026&quot; end=&quot;1044&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Yes, this is... &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;Strooong Baaad calling for... Strooong Saaad...&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="11" end="27" speaker="marzipan">Hi, this is Marzipan.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1045&quot; end=&quot;1066&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Yes, this is... Strooong Baaad &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;calling for... Strooong Saaad...&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="28" end="92" speaker="marzipan">I'm off volunteering in the Coches Mountains, teaching the heathens how to bend pipe cleaners.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1067&quot; end=&quot;1085&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Yes, this is... Strooong Baaad calling for... &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;Strooong Saaad...&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="93" end="100" speaker="marzipan">I'll be back in-</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1086&quot; end=&quot;1116&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Yes, this is... Strooong Baaad calling for... Strooong Saaad...&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="101" end="105" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1117&quot; end=&quot;1163&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;uh, I'm gonna knee you in the face... &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;for breakfast?&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="106" end="124" speaker="strongsad">Sorry, Marzy.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1164&quot; end=&quot;1183&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;uh, I'm gonna knee you in the face... for breakfast?&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="125" end="170" speaker="strongsad">Time to exercise one of my favorite perks of house-sitting!</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1184&quot; end=&quot;1210&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Hold on, let me reconfigure and call back.&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="171" end="176" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1211&quot; end=&quot;1218&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;beep&lt;/line&gt;


   &lt;line start=&quot;1227&quot; end=&quot;1250&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Hey, Ella Phantzgerald.&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="183" end="216" speaker="strongsad">Grrrreetings weary telephone traveler.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1251&quot; end=&quot;1316&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;I left some of my stuff over at Marzipan's the last time she always had me over there for dinner all the time.&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="217" end="284" speaker="strongsad">I sense you have come in search of Marzipan, but you have stumbled upon so much more.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1317&quot; end=&quot;1343&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;So when you come home, could you be sure to grab&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="285" end="332" speaker="strongsad">'Tis I, Strong Sad, house-sitter extraordinaire.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1344&quot; end=&quot;1369&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;my Marzipan's TV, &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;my Marzipan's guitar and amp, and oh yeah, my Marzipan's cash and her jewelery.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="333" end="397" speaker="strongsad">Please organize your thoughts for Marzipan in order of least depressing to most depressing.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1370&quot; end=&quot;1397&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;my Marzipan's TV, my Marzipan's guitar and amp, &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;and oh yeah, my Marzipan's cash and her jewelery.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="398" end="442" speaker="strongsad">As for crank calls, allow me to give you a theme:</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1398&quot; end=&quot;1408&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;my Marzipan's TV, my Marzipan's guitar and amp, and oh yeah, &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;my Marzipan's cash and her jewelery.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="443" end="470" speaker="strongsad">furtive glances.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1409&quot; end=&quot;1436&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;my Marzipan's TV, my Marzipan's guitar and amp, and oh yeah, my Marzipan's cash and her jewelery.&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="471" end="475" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1437&quot; end=&quot;1502&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;If you do, the chance of dead things in your bed drops into the 42 percent range!&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="476" end="501" speaker="strongsad">Ugh, too verbose.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1503&quot; end=&quot;1511&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;beep&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="502" end="530" speaker="strongsad">Come on, Sads, quick and to the point!</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1512&quot; end=&quot;1531&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Yeah, you can ignore that one.&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="531" end="548" speaker="strongsad">In and out! Hook 'em and cook 'em!</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1532&quot; end=&quot;1550&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;clunking noises&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="549" end="555" speaker="sfx">beep</line>


   &lt;line start=&quot;1561&quot; end=&quot;1596&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Dang, Marzipan, you sounding fine.&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="562" end="591" speaker="strongsad">Marzipan be gone! Strong Sad be here,</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1597&quot; end=&quot;1647&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;You sound finer than the fine you get when you return a movie late to the movie store!&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="592" end="619" speaker="strongsad">so drop your purpose in mine ear!</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;1648&quot; end=&quot;1696&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;You're even sounding finer than a three dollar fine for new releases!&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="620" end="648" speaker="strongsad">I'll pass it on before too long—</line>
  &lt;line start=&quot;1697&quot; end=&quot;1718&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Maybe I should swing by for a lit—&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="649" end="653" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
  &lt;line start=&quot;1719&quot; end=&quot;1743&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;That is quite enough!&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="654" end="671" speaker="strongsad">Let's pretend that never happened.</line>
  &lt;line start=&quot;1744&quot; end=&quot;1763&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Oh! Marzipan!&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="672" end="680" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
  &lt;line start=&quot;1764&quot; end=&quot;1798&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;You look, um, great... &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;Is that a new... skin you're wearing?&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
   &lt;line start=&quot;1799&quot; end=&quot;1815&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;You look, um, great... Is that a new... &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;skin you're wearing?&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1816&quot; end=&quot;1834&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;You look, um, great... Is that a new... skin you're wearing?&lt;/line&gt;
   &lt;line start=&quot;1835&quot; end=&quot;1858&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;It's Strong Sad!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1859&quot; end=&quot;1922&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;It is! It is strong sad and strong unfortunate what happened to your &lt;em&gt;face!&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1923&quot; end=&quot;1929&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Ooh! &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;Preow!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1930&quot; end=&quot;1936&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Ooh! Preow!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1937&quot; end=&quot;1943&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Call me! &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;Preow!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1944&quot; end=&quot;1954&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Call me! Preow!&lt;/line&gt;
   &lt;line start=&quot;1955&quot; end=&quot;1960&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;beep&lt;/line&gt;


   &lt;line start=&quot;1970&quot; end=&quot;2044&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;What a crock! This is &lt;em&gt;not&lt;/em&gt; what I plunked 9 bucks in quarters into a broken pay phone to hear!&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="687" end="750" speaker="strongsad">Hello, this is Strong Sad, temporary steward of Marzipan's domicile.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2045&quot; end=&quot;2103&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;Strong Sad, remind me to kick your shins unmercifully next time I see ya!&lt;/line&gt;
  <line start="751" end="783" speaker="strongsad">Please leave your jumbled message at the tone,</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2104&quot; end=&quot;2171&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;And also, ya think the five hundred feet from Marzipan's house thing still counts if she's not in it?&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="784" end="861" speaker="strongsad">so I can articulately reword it in journal form for Marzipan to read upon her safe return.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2172&quot; end=&quot;2248&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;Cause I cop some sweet goose flesh when I hit that four hundred n' ninety-seven foot range.&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="862" end="867" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2249&quot; end=&quot;2296&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;Whoa, creeped &lt;em&gt;myself&lt;/em&gt; out there. Gonna hang up!&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="868" end="896" speaker="strongsad">Good enough for guv'ent work I say.</line>
   <line start="897" end="907" speaker="sfx">beep</line>


   &lt;line start=&quot;2297&quot; end=&quot;2305&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;beep&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="912" end="969" speaker="strongbad">Wait, what? Hold on, I wasn't prepared for this. Just gimme a sec.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2313&quot; end=&quot;2334&quot; speaker=&quot;kingoftown&quot; sfx=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;munching noises&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="970" end="1009"><sfx volume="0.7">writing noises</sfx><strongbad volume="0.7" sfx="sfx">mumbling noises</strongbad></line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2335&quot; end=&quot;2376&quot; speaker=&quot;kingoftown&quot;&gt;What? Sorry, I didn't hear your outgoing message.&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1010" end="1025" speaker="strongbad">Okay, I'm ready.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2377&quot; end=&quot;2413&quot; speaker=&quot;kingoftown&quot;&gt;I was choking down a chocolate dipped tapeworm.&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1026" end="1044" speaker="strongbad">Yes, this is... <span style="visibility:hidden">Strooong Baaad calling for... Strooong Saaad...</span></line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2414&quot; end=&quot;2524&quot; speaker=&quot;kingoftown&quot;&gt;Anyways, agent Panzimar, about the plot against S. Sad, things are moving along just as planned.&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1045" end="1066" speaker="strongbad">Yes, this is... Strooong Baaad <span style="visibility:hidden">calling for... Strooong Saaad...</span></line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2525&quot; end=&quot;2549&quot; speaker=&quot;kingoftown&quot;&gt;Hit a snag with step 2, though.&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1067" end="1085" speaker="strongbad">Yes, this is... Strooong Baaad calling for... <span style="visibility:hidden">Strooong Saaad...</span></line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2550&quot; end=&quot;2593&quot; speaker=&quot;kingoftown&quot;&gt;The camel died and was decidedly undelicious.&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1086" end="1116" speaker="strongbad">Yes, this is... Strooong Baaad calling for... Strooong Saaad...</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2594&quot; end=&quot;2630&quot; speaker=&quot;kingoftown&quot;&gt;Will move forward with barrel of hot sauce approach.&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1117" end="1163" speaker="strongbad">uh, I'm gonna knee you in the face... <span style="visibility:hidden">for breakfast?</span></line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2631&quot; end=&quot;2694&quot; speaker=&quot;kingoftown&quot;&gt;Provided that makes it past dinner time, look for my signal in the northwest sky.&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1164" end="1183" speaker="strongbad">uh, I'm gonna knee you in the face... for breakfast?</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2695&quot; end=&quot;2714&quot; speaker=&quot;kingoftown&quot;&gt;Ting of Kown, out!&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1184" end="1210" speaker="strongbad">Hold on, let me reconfigure and call back.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2715&quot; end=&quot;2723&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;beep&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1211" end="1218" speaker="sfx">beep</line>


   &lt;line start=&quot;2731&quot; end=&quot;2768&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;Strong Sad! What did you do to my outgoing message?&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1227" end="1250" speaker="strongbad">Hey, Ella Phantzgerald.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2769&quot; end=&quot;2801&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;Those things are like my adopted foreign babies!&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1251" end="1316" speaker="strongbad">I left some of my stuff over at Marzipan's the last time she always had me over there for dinner all the time.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2802&quot; end=&quot;2820&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;Anyway, I forgot to tell you that&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1317" end="1343" speaker="strongbad">So when you come home, could you be sure to grab</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2821&quot; end=&quot;2830&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;a guy named &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;Slick Somebody called from a place called Marzipan's Stupid Face plumbing,&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1344" end="1369" speaker="strongbad">my Marzipan's TV, <span style="visibility:hidden">my Marzipan's guitar and amp, and oh yeah, my Marzipan's cash and her jewelery.</span></line>
  &lt;line start=&quot;2831&quot; end=&quot;2842&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;a guy named Slick Somebody &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;called from a place called Marzipan's Stupid Face plumbing,&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1370" end="1397" speaker="strongbad">my Marzipan's TV, my Marzipan's guitar and amp, <span style="visibility:hidden">and oh yeah, my Marzipan's cash and her jewelery.</span></line>
  &lt;line start=&quot;2843&quot; end=&quot;2860&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;a guy named Slick Somebody called from a place called &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;Marzipan's Stupid Face plumbing,&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1398" end="1408" speaker="strongbad">my Marzipan's TV, my Marzipan's guitar and amp, and oh yeah, <span style="visibility:hidden">my Marzipan's cash and her jewelery.</span></line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2861&quot; end=&quot;2884&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;a guy named Slick Somebody called from a place called Marzipan's Stupid Face plumbing,&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1409" end="1436" speaker="strongbad">my Marzipan's TV, my Marzipan's guitar and amp, and oh yeah, my Marzipan's cash and her jewelery.</line>
  &lt;line start=&quot;2885&quot; end=&quot;2911&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;and said he replaced my toilet's... &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;Roman candle valve? Whatever that is.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1437" end="1502" speaker="strongbad">If you do, the chance of dead things in your bed drops into the 42 percent range!</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2912&quot; end=&quot;2929&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;and said he replaced my toilet's... Roman candle valve? &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;Whatever that is.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1503" end="1511" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2930&quot; end=&quot;2941&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;and said he replaced my toilet's... Roman candle valve? Whatever that is.&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1512" end="1531" speaker="strongbad">Yeah, you can ignore that one.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2942&quot; end=&quot;2954&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;So maybe don't flush the toilet until-&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1532" end="1550" speaker="sfx">clunking noises</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;2955&quot; end=&quot;2968&quot;&gt;&lt;marzipan&gt;So maybe don't flush the toilet until-&lt;/marzipan&gt;&lt;sfx&gt;toilet flush&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2969&quot; end=&quot;2980&quot;&gt;&lt;sfx&gt;firework noises&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;sfx&gt;toilet flush&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;strongsad&gt;Ohhh!&lt;/strongsad&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
   &lt;line start=&quot;2981&quot; end=&quot;3106&quot;&gt;&lt;sfx&gt;firework noises&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;sfx&gt;toilet flush&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;3107&quot; end=&quot;3114&quot;&gt;&lt;strongsad&gt;Ohhh...&lt;/strongsad&gt;&lt;sfx&gt;toilet flush&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
   &lt;line start=&quot;3115&quot; end=&quot;3121&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;beep&lt;/line&gt;


   &lt;line start=&quot;3129&quot; end=&quot;3156&quot; speaker=&quot;bubs&quot;&gt;Marzipan, it's Bubs!&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1561" end="1596" speaker="homestar">Dang, Marzipan, you sounding fine.</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;3157&quot; end=&quot;3188&quot; speaker=&quot;bubs&quot;&gt;You're three weeks late on that movie rental, lady!&lt;/line&gt;
  <line start="1597" end="1647" speaker="homestar">You sound finer than the fine you get when you return a movie late to the movie store!</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;3189&quot; end=&quot;3255&quot; speaker=&quot;bubs&quot;&gt;And that V. I. Warshawski still counts as a new release! That's three dollars a day!&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1648" end="1696" speaker="homestar">You're even sounding finer than a three dollar fine for new releases!</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;3256&quot; end=&quot;3279&quot; speaker=&quot;bubs&quot;&gt;Plus, what's wrong witcha voice?&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1697" end="1718" speaker="homestar">Maybe I should swing by for a lit—</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;3280&quot; end=&quot;3322&quot; speaker=&quot;bubs&quot;&gt;You sound all fat, depressing, and Allan Poe.&lt;/line&gt;
  <line start="1719" end="1743" speaker="strongsad">That is quite enough!</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;3323&quot; end=&quot;3361&quot; speaker=&quot;bubs&quot;&gt;And you're gonna be &lt;em&gt;real&lt;/em&gt; po' if you don't pay that late fee!&lt;/line&gt;
  <line start="1744" end="1763" speaker="homestar">Oh! Marzipan!</line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;3362&quot; end=&quot;3383&quot; speaker=&quot;bubs&quot;&gt;Heh heh heh. Shop at Bubs'!&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1764" end="1798" speaker="homestar">You look, um, great... <span style="visibility:hidden">Is that a new... skin you're wearing?</span></line>
   &lt;line start=&quot;3384&quot; end=&quot;3389&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;beep&lt;/line&gt;
   <line start="1799" end="1815" speaker="homestar">You look, um, great... Is that a new... <span style="visibility:hidden">skin you're wearing?</span></line>
&lt;/transcript&gt;</pre>
   <line start="1816" end="1834" speaker="homestar">You look, um, great... Is that a new... skin you're wearing?</line>
<div id="catlinks" class="catlinks">
  <line start="1835" end="1858" speaker="strongsad">It's Strong Sad!</line>
  <line start="1859" end="1922" speaker="homestar">It is! It is strong sad and strong unfortunate what happened to your <em>face!</em></line>
  <line start="1923" end="1929" speaker="homestar">Ooh! <span style="visibility:hidden">Preow!</span></line>
   <line start="1930" end="1936" speaker="homestar">Ooh! Preow!</line>
   <line start="1937" end="1943" speaker="homestar">Call me! <span style="visibility:hidden">Preow!</span></line>
  <line start="1944" end="1954" speaker="homestar">Call me! Preow!</line>
  <line start="1955" end="1960" speaker="sfx">beep</line>


<div id="mw-normal-catlinks">
  <line start="1970" end="2044" speaker="coachz">What a crock! This is <em>not</em> what I plunked 9 bucks in quarters into a broken pay phone to hear!</line>
  <line start="2045" end="2103" speaker="coachz">Strong Sad, remind me to kick your shins unmercifully next time I see ya!</line>
  <line start="2104" end="2171" speaker="coachz">And also, ya think the five hundred feet from Marzipan's house thing still counts if she's not in it?</line>
  <line start="2172" end="2248" speaker="coachz">Cause I cop some sweet goose flesh when I hit that four hundred n' ninety-seven foot range.</line>
  <line start="2249" end="2296" speaker="coachz">Whoa, creeped <em>myself</em> out there. Gonna hang up!</line>


[/wiki/Special:Categories Category]: <span dir="ltr">[[Category:English Subtitles|English Subtitles]]</span>
  <line start="2297" end="2305" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
  <line start="2313" end="2334" speaker="kingoftown" sfx="sfx">munching noises</line>
  <line start="2335" end="2376" speaker="kingoftown">What? Sorry, I didn't hear your outgoing message.</line>
  <line start="2377" end="2413" speaker="kingoftown">I was choking down a chocolate dipped tapeworm.</line>
  <line start="2414" end="2524" speaker="kingoftown">Anyways, agent Panzimar, about the plot against S. Sad, things are moving along just as planned.</line>
  <line start="2525" end="2549" speaker="kingoftown">Hit a snag with step 2, though.</line>
  <line start="2550" end="2593" speaker="kingoftown">The camel died and was decidedly undelicious.</line>
  <line start="2594" end="2630" speaker="kingoftown">Will move forward with barrel of hot sauce approach.</line>
  <line start="2631" end="2694" speaker="kingoftown">Provided that makes it past dinner time, look for my signal in the northwest sky.</line>
  <line start="2695" end="2714" speaker="kingoftown">Ting of Kown, out!</line>
  <line start="2715" end="2723" speaker="sfx">beep</line>


</div>
  <line start="2731" end="2768" speaker="marzipan">Strong Sad! What did you do to my outgoing message?</line>
  <line start="2769" end="2801" speaker="marzipan">Those things are like my adopted foreign babies!</line>
  <line start="2802" end="2820" speaker="marzipan">Anyway, I forgot to tell you that</line>
  <line start="2821" end="2830" speaker="marzipan">a guy named <span style="visibility:hidden">Slick Somebody called from a place called Marzipan's Stupid Face plumbing,</span></line>
  <line start="2831" end="2842" speaker="marzipan">a guy named Slick Somebody <span style="visibility:hidden">called from a place called Marzipan's Stupid Face plumbing,</span></line>
  <line start="2843" end="2860" speaker="marzipan">a guy named Slick Somebody called from a place called <span style="visibility:hidden">Marzipan's Stupid Face plumbing,</span></line>
  <line start="2861" end="2884" speaker="marzipan">a guy named Slick Somebody called from a place called Marzipan's Stupid Face plumbing,</line>
  <line start="2885" end="2911" speaker="marzipan">and said he replaced my toilet's... <span style="visibility:hidden">Roman candle valve? Whatever that is.</span></line>
  <line start="2912" end="2929" speaker="marzipan">and said he replaced my toilet's... Roman candle valve? <span style="visibility:hidden">Whatever that is.</span></line>
  <line start="2930" end="2941" speaker="marzipan">and said he replaced my toilet's... Roman candle valve? Whatever that is.</line>
  <line start="2942" end="2954" speaker="marzipan">So maybe don't flush the toilet until-</line>
  <line start="2955" end="2968"><marzipan>So maybe don't flush the toilet until-</marzipan><sfx>toilet flush</sfx></line>
  <line start="2969" end="2980"><sfx>firework noises</sfx><sfx>toilet flush</sfx><strongsad>Ohhh!</strongsad></line>
  <line start="2981" end="3106"><sfx>firework noises</sfx><sfx>toilet flush</sfx></line>
  <line start="3107" end="3114"><strongsad>Ohhh...</strongsad><sfx>toilet flush</sfx></line>
  <line start="3115" end="3121" speaker="sfx">beep</line>


</div>
  <line start="3129" end="3156" speaker="bubs">Marzipan, it's Bubs!</line>
  <line start="3157" end="3188" speaker="bubs">You're three weeks late on that movie rental, lady!</line>
  <line start="3189" end="3255" speaker="bubs">And that V. I. Warshawski still counts as a new release! That's three dollars a day!</line>
  <line start="3256" end="3279" speaker="bubs">Plus, what's wrong witcha voice?</line>
  <line start="3280" end="3322" speaker="bubs">You sound all fat, depressing, and Allan Poe.</line>
  <line start="3323" end="3361" speaker="bubs">And you're gonna be <em>real</em> po' if you don't pay that late fee!</line>
  <line start="3362" end="3383" speaker="bubs">Heh heh heh. Shop at Bubs'!</line>
  <line start="3384" end="3389" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
</transcript>
</pre>
[[Category:English Subtitles]]


Latest revision as of 14:24, 14 July 2026

80px-Subtitles_Project_Logo.pngWM0

These are the English subtitles for Marzipan's Answering Machine Version 16.2. watch this toon To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the All-In-One Greasemonkey script for Firefox or the Homestar All-In-One extension for Chrome.
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<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="answer16.swf" width="550" height="400">
  <line start="11" end="27" speaker="marzipan">Hi, this is Marzipan.</line>
  <line start="28" end="92" speaker="marzipan">I'm off volunteering in the Coches Mountains, teaching the heathens how to bend pipe cleaners.</line>
  <line start="93" end="100" speaker="marzipan">I'll be back in-</line>
  <line start="101" end="105" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
  <line start="106" end="124" speaker="strongsad">Sorry, Marzy.</line>
  <line start="125" end="170" speaker="strongsad">Time to exercise one of my favorite perks of house-sitting!</line>
  <line start="171" end="176" speaker="sfx">beep</line>

  <line start="183" end="216" speaker="strongsad">Grrrreetings weary telephone traveler.</line>
  <line start="217" end="284" speaker="strongsad">I sense you have come in search of Marzipan, but you have stumbled upon so much more.</line>
  <line start="285" end="332" speaker="strongsad">'Tis I, Strong Sad, house-sitter extraordinaire.</line>
  <line start="333" end="397" speaker="strongsad">Please organize your thoughts for Marzipan in order of least depressing to most depressing.</line>
  <line start="398" end="442" speaker="strongsad">As for crank calls, allow me to give you a theme:</line>
  <line start="443" end="470" speaker="strongsad">furtive glances.</line>
  <line start="471" end="475" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
  <line start="476" end="501" speaker="strongsad">Ugh, too verbose.</line>
  <line start="502" end="530" speaker="strongsad">Come on, Sads, quick and to the point!</line>
  <line start="531" end="548" speaker="strongsad">In and out! Hook 'em and cook 'em!</line>
  <line start="549" end="555" speaker="sfx">beep</line>

  <line start="562" end="591" speaker="strongsad">Marzipan be gone! Strong Sad be here,</line>
  <line start="592" end="619" speaker="strongsad">so drop your purpose in mine ear!</line>
  <line start="620" end="648" speaker="strongsad">I'll pass it on before too long—</line>
  <line start="649" end="653" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
  <line start="654" end="671" speaker="strongsad">Let's pretend that never happened.</line>
  <line start="672" end="680" speaker="sfx">beep</line>

  <line start="687" end="750" speaker="strongsad">Hello, this is Strong Sad, temporary steward of Marzipan's domicile.</line>
  <line start="751" end="783" speaker="strongsad">Please leave your jumbled message at the tone,</line>
  <line start="784" end="861" speaker="strongsad">so I can articulately reword it in journal form for Marzipan to read upon her safe return.</line>
  <line start="862" end="867" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
  <line start="868" end="896" speaker="strongsad">Good enough for guv'ent work I say.</line>
  <line start="897" end="907" speaker="sfx">beep</line>

  <line start="912" end="969" speaker="strongbad">Wait, what? Hold on, I wasn't prepared for this. Just gimme a sec.</line>
  <line start="970" end="1009"><sfx volume="0.7">writing noises</sfx><strongbad volume="0.7" sfx="sfx">mumbling noises</strongbad></line>
  <line start="1010" end="1025" speaker="strongbad">Okay, I'm ready.</line>
  <line start="1026" end="1044" speaker="strongbad">Yes, this is... <span style="visibility:hidden">Strooong Baaad calling for... Strooong Saaad...</span></line>
  <line start="1045" end="1066" speaker="strongbad">Yes, this is... Strooong Baaad <span style="visibility:hidden">calling for... Strooong Saaad...</span></line>
  <line start="1067" end="1085" speaker="strongbad">Yes, this is... Strooong Baaad calling for... <span style="visibility:hidden">Strooong Saaad...</span></line>
  <line start="1086" end="1116" speaker="strongbad">Yes, this is... Strooong Baaad calling for... Strooong Saaad...</line>
  <line start="1117" end="1163" speaker="strongbad">uh, I'm gonna knee you in the face... <span style="visibility:hidden">for breakfast?</span></line>
  <line start="1164" end="1183" speaker="strongbad">uh, I'm gonna knee you in the face... for breakfast?</line>
  <line start="1184" end="1210" speaker="strongbad">Hold on, let me reconfigure and call back.</line>
  <line start="1211" end="1218" speaker="sfx">beep</line>

  <line start="1227" end="1250" speaker="strongbad">Hey, Ella Phantzgerald.</line>
  <line start="1251" end="1316" speaker="strongbad">I left some of my stuff over at Marzipan's the last time she always had me over there for dinner all the time.</line>
  <line start="1317" end="1343" speaker="strongbad">So when you come home, could you be sure to grab</line>
  <line start="1344" end="1369" speaker="strongbad">my Marzipan's TV, <span style="visibility:hidden">my Marzipan's guitar and amp, and oh yeah, my Marzipan's cash and her jewelery.</span></line>
  <line start="1370" end="1397" speaker="strongbad">my Marzipan's TV, my Marzipan's guitar and amp, <span style="visibility:hidden">and oh yeah, my Marzipan's cash and her jewelery.</span></line>
  <line start="1398" end="1408" speaker="strongbad">my Marzipan's TV, my Marzipan's guitar and amp, and oh yeah, <span style="visibility:hidden">my Marzipan's cash and her jewelery.</span></line>
  <line start="1409" end="1436" speaker="strongbad">my Marzipan's TV, my Marzipan's guitar and amp, and oh yeah, my Marzipan's cash and her jewelery.</line>
  <line start="1437" end="1502" speaker="strongbad">If you do, the chance of dead things in your bed drops into the 42 percent range!</line>
  <line start="1503" end="1511" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
  <line start="1512" end="1531" speaker="strongbad">Yeah, you can ignore that one.</line>
  <line start="1532" end="1550" speaker="sfx">clunking noises</line>

  <line start="1561" end="1596" speaker="homestar">Dang, Marzipan, you sounding fine.</line>
  <line start="1597" end="1647" speaker="homestar">You sound finer than the fine you get when you return a movie late to the movie store!</line>
  <line start="1648" end="1696" speaker="homestar">You're even sounding finer than a three dollar fine for new releases!</line>
  <line start="1697" end="1718" speaker="homestar">Maybe I should swing by for a lit—</line>
  <line start="1719" end="1743" speaker="strongsad">That is quite enough!</line>
  <line start="1744" end="1763" speaker="homestar">Oh! Marzipan!</line>
  <line start="1764" end="1798" speaker="homestar">You look, um, great... <span style="visibility:hidden">Is that a new... skin you're wearing?</span></line>
  <line start="1799" end="1815" speaker="homestar">You look, um, great... Is that a new... <span style="visibility:hidden">skin you're wearing?</span></line>
  <line start="1816" end="1834" speaker="homestar">You look, um, great... Is that a new... skin you're wearing?</line>
  <line start="1835" end="1858" speaker="strongsad">It's Strong Sad!</line>
  <line start="1859" end="1922" speaker="homestar">It is! It is strong sad and strong unfortunate what happened to your <em>face!</em></line>
  <line start="1923" end="1929" speaker="homestar">Ooh! <span style="visibility:hidden">Preow!</span></line>
  <line start="1930" end="1936" speaker="homestar">Ooh! Preow!</line>
  <line start="1937" end="1943" speaker="homestar">Call me! <span style="visibility:hidden">Preow!</span></line>
  <line start="1944" end="1954" speaker="homestar">Call me! Preow!</line>
  <line start="1955" end="1960" speaker="sfx">beep</line>

  <line start="1970" end="2044" speaker="coachz">What a crock! This is <em>not</em> what I plunked 9 bucks in quarters into a broken pay phone to hear!</line>
  <line start="2045" end="2103" speaker="coachz">Strong Sad, remind me to kick your shins unmercifully next time I see ya!</line>
  <line start="2104" end="2171" speaker="coachz">And also, ya think the five hundred feet from Marzipan's house thing still counts if she's not in it?</line>
  <line start="2172" end="2248" speaker="coachz">Cause I cop some sweet goose flesh when I hit that four hundred n' ninety-seven foot range.</line>
  <line start="2249" end="2296" speaker="coachz">Whoa, creeped <em>myself</em> out there. Gonna hang up!</line>

  <line start="2297" end="2305" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
  <line start="2313" end="2334" speaker="kingoftown" sfx="sfx">munching noises</line>
  <line start="2335" end="2376" speaker="kingoftown">What? Sorry, I didn't hear your outgoing message.</line>
  <line start="2377" end="2413" speaker="kingoftown">I was choking down a chocolate dipped tapeworm.</line>
  <line start="2414" end="2524" speaker="kingoftown">Anyways, agent Panzimar, about the plot against S. Sad, things are moving along just as planned.</line>
  <line start="2525" end="2549" speaker="kingoftown">Hit a snag with step 2, though.</line>
  <line start="2550" end="2593" speaker="kingoftown">The camel died and was decidedly undelicious.</line>
  <line start="2594" end="2630" speaker="kingoftown">Will move forward with barrel of hot sauce approach.</line>
  <line start="2631" end="2694" speaker="kingoftown">Provided that makes it past dinner time, look for my signal in the northwest sky.</line>
  <line start="2695" end="2714" speaker="kingoftown">Ting of Kown, out!</line>
  <line start="2715" end="2723" speaker="sfx">beep</line>

  <line start="2731" end="2768" speaker="marzipan">Strong Sad! What did you do to my outgoing message?</line>
  <line start="2769" end="2801" speaker="marzipan">Those things are like my adopted foreign babies!</line>
  <line start="2802" end="2820" speaker="marzipan">Anyway, I forgot to tell you that</line> 
  <line start="2821" end="2830" speaker="marzipan">a guy named <span style="visibility:hidden">Slick Somebody called from a place called Marzipan's Stupid Face plumbing,</span></line>
  <line start="2831" end="2842" speaker="marzipan">a guy named Slick Somebody <span style="visibility:hidden">called from a place called Marzipan's Stupid Face plumbing,</span></line>
  <line start="2843" end="2860" speaker="marzipan">a guy named Slick Somebody called from a place called <span style="visibility:hidden">Marzipan's Stupid Face plumbing,</span></line>
  <line start="2861" end="2884" speaker="marzipan">a guy named Slick Somebody called from a place called Marzipan's Stupid Face plumbing,</line>
  <line start="2885" end="2911" speaker="marzipan">and said he replaced my toilet's... <span style="visibility:hidden">Roman candle valve? Whatever that is.</span></line>
  <line start="2912" end="2929" speaker="marzipan">and said he replaced my toilet's... Roman candle valve? <span style="visibility:hidden">Whatever that is.</span></line>
  <line start="2930" end="2941" speaker="marzipan">and said he replaced my toilet's... Roman candle valve? Whatever that is.</line>
  <line start="2942" end="2954" speaker="marzipan">So maybe don't flush the toilet until-</line>
  <line start="2955" end="2968"><marzipan>So maybe don't flush the toilet until-</marzipan><sfx>toilet flush</sfx></line>
  <line start="2969" end="2980"><sfx>firework noises</sfx><sfx>toilet flush</sfx><strongsad>Ohhh!</strongsad></line>
  <line start="2981" end="3106"><sfx>firework noises</sfx><sfx>toilet flush</sfx></line>
  <line start="3107" end="3114"><strongsad>Ohhh...</strongsad><sfx>toilet flush</sfx></line>
  <line start="3115" end="3121" speaker="sfx">beep</line>

  <line start="3129" end="3156" speaker="bubs">Marzipan, it's Bubs!</line>
  <line start="3157" end="3188" speaker="bubs">You're three weeks late on that movie rental, lady!</line>
  <line start="3189" end="3255" speaker="bubs">And that V. I. Warshawski still counts as a new release! That's three dollars a day!</line>
  <line start="3256" end="3279" speaker="bubs">Plus, what's wrong witcha voice?</line>
  <line start="3280" end="3322" speaker="bubs">You sound all fat, depressing, and Allan Poe.</line>
  <line start="3323" end="3361" speaker="bubs">And you're gonna be <em>real</em> po' if you don't pay that late fee!</line>
  <line start="3362" end="3383" speaker="bubs">Heh heh heh. Shop at Bubs'!</line>
  <line start="3384" end="3389" speaker="sfx">beep</line>
</transcript>
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