nightlife

Strong Bad Email #185

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"NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN, MR. JOHNSON!"

Strong Bad describes the night life of Strong Badia.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Strong Sad, Homestar Runner, Strong Mad, Pom Pom, Bubs, Marzipan, The Cheat, Coach Z, The King of Town (Easter egg)

Places: Computer Room, Carrot and Kazoo Hill, Strong Bad's Room, Basement of the Brothers Strong, The Field, Club Technochocolate, The King of Town's Castle (Easter egg)

Computer: Lappy 486

Date: Monday, December 10, 2007

Running Time: 4:12

Page Title: Lappy 486

DVD: strongbad_email.exe Disc Six

Transcript

STRONG BAD: {singing} Another week, another email scandal! Strong Bad gonna fly off the handle! {brings up the email}

subject: strong bad email

Hey mr S to the B
I was wondering what the nightlife is like in strongbadia?
What kinda hip clubs and fun hotspots are there to
check out?
Somekindaguy
Josh CO

{Strong Bad reads "Mr" as "mer", "Somekindaguy" as "Soma-keenda-goo-ay" and "Josh CO" as "JoshCO!", adding "makers of funny products and funnier slogans." He also puts emphasis on "kinda" as if "kinda hip" meant "somewhat hip"}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Well, we only have one real fun hotspot. As you may well have already guessed, I am of course talking about

{Carrot and Kazoo Hill is shown, with Homestar and Strong Sad standing on it.}

STRONG BAD: {offscreen} Carrot and Kazoo Hill.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {unemotional} Whee.

STRONG SAD: Good times.

{Back to the Lappy}

STRONG BAD: {typing} Man, the hill was jumpin' that night! As far as clubs go, Club Technochocolate is about as kinda hip as it gets! Some towns have party clubs, but we've got our very own bona fide pwawty cloughb!

{A flyer is shown while music begins to play in the background, which reads: Club Technochocolate / Free Country USA's Premier / PWAWTY CLOUGHB / (Not a place for technological chocolate bars)}

STRONG BAD: {offscreen} When I'm going out to the cloughb, I always like to take off {Cut to Strong Bad's bedroom. He is standing in the foreground messing with his shirt.} my best shirt! {His best shirt is light blue with a tribal mark. He rips it open with a "huah!", popping a button. He begins to spray himself with body spray.}

{Camera cuts to Strong Sad, who is leaning in the doorway from the basement.}

STRONG SAD: Strong Bad, are you putting on body spray?

{Cut back to Strong Bad, still holding the black can of body spray}

STRONG BAD: Shut up! Guys don't wear body spray. This is uh... the blood... of slain... warrior... mammoths.

{Scene darkens, and Strong Bad continues to spray on the "Mammoth Blood"}

STRONG BAD: {offscreen} Of course, the cloughb only lets the freshest clientèle inside. But my name has been laser-etched into the guest list by now.

{a location somewhere in the Field is shown, at night. Strong Mad is standing behind a velvet rope as Strong Bad walks up.}

STRONG MAD: NAME PLEASE!

STRONG BAD: Come on, man, drop the act! I've gotta get into the pwawty cloughb.

STRONG MAD: {holding up a grease-stained Blubb-O's bag} YOU'RE NOT ON THE LIST!

STRONG BAD: The list?! You're looking at a greasy bag of fast food!

STRONG MAD: DON'T BE SO HARD ON YOURSELF! {he laughs}

STRONG BAD: Wait, what? Strong Mad, did you just make a joke?! That was pretty good! Now hows about letting me in?

STRONG MAD: NAME PLEASE!

STRONG BAD: Uh... Spicy Crispy Chicken Melt... Johnson.

STRONG MAD: NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN, MR. JOHNSON! {he unhooks the rope and lets Strong Bad through}

{Various Cuts: Club TechnoChocolate. Bubs, Marzipan, and Pom Pom are seen dancing. The Cheat is DJ'ing. Dance music can be heard in the background.}

SINGERS: {the second singer has a robotic voice, and speaks under the first} Smart drinks. These are smart drinks. (These are not smart drinks.) Smart drinks.—

{Cut to: Club Technochocolate's bar. Strong Bad walks in from our left. Bubs slides in from our right, behind the bar.}

SINGERS: {Continuing behind the Bubs scene} —These are smart drinks. (These are definitely not smart drinks.) Have another round. (Don't have another round.) Have another round! (Do not have another round.) These are smart drinks. (These are not smart drinks.) These are smart drinks. (These are definitely not smart drinks.)

BUBS: Well, if it isn't my main man Spicy Crispy Chicken Melt.

STRONG BAD: I need the brightest, glowiest drink in the house.

{Zoom in on Bubs}

BUBS: How about a nice Pink Elephant Pants?

{Zoom out again}

STRONG BAD: I'll take it!

{Bubs reaches under the bar, and produces an eyedropper containing a green liquid}

BUBS: That'll be $17.50.

STRONG BAD: Whoa! You guys must be having a sale!

{the edge of the Club Technochocolate dance floor is seen. Marzipan and Strong Sad are standing just off the dance floor. Strong Sad is wearing fishnet gloves.}

MARZIPAN: You don't look like you're having very much fun, Strong Sad.

STRONG SAD: Oh I'm having a great time. This is my favorite club to go to, and not dance. Sometimes I'll even think about dancing, and then not dance. And if I'm feeling really crazy, I'll actually get out on the dance floor, and bust some fresh not-dancing.

MARZIPAN: Then how about I start busting some fresh not-hanging-out-with-you.

{Marzipan walks off. Cut to Strong Bad dancing on the dance floor.}

SINGER: Smart drinks. These are smart drinks.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {off-screen} Hey Strong Bad.

{Zoom out. Homestar is standing behind Strong Bad (our left). He looks like he has just woken up, complete with cinnamon, dressing gown, sleeping cap, and Nebulon slippers. His eyes are closed.}

STRONG BAD: Homestar, get outta here! I'm doin my matin' dance.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {eyes still closed} {unintelligible} more, more...badges.

STRONG BAD: What?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Because I got more badges than you.

STRONG BAD: Homestar, are you asleep?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Because I sold more thin mints than you.

STRONG BAD: Homestar, are you asleep and dreaming that you're a girl scout?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: No Ma'am, Troop Beverly Hills.

{The Cheat is DJing in the DJ booth.}

STRONG BAD: {offscreen} And at some point during the night, we all get "treated" to Coach Z {Zoom out, Coach Z with a mic} attempting to freestyle.

COACH Z: One two one two, 'bout to freestyle... One, two? One two?

STRONG BAD: {offscreen} I mean... count to two over and over again.

COACH Z: {overlapping} Ha, one two one two! Here I go! Hang on, one two.

STRONG BAD: {offscreen} And no night at the cloughb would be complete, without me getting tossed out on my leopard print hinders.

{Back to the entrance. Strong Bad gets tossed out, wearing leopard print underwear. Strong Mad is no longer visible.}

STRONG BAD: It's not my fault! It's those light-èd floors! I think my pants are mysteriously drawn to them!

{Strong Bad's pants get thrown out too. They land on his head and remain unfolded.}

{Cut back to Lappy}

STRONG BAD: {typing} So that's the nightlife around here, Soma. Of course, there's also the pour rotten milk on Marzipan's prized petunias while she's asleep variety of nightlife as well, but that's another email, for another time. This has been Strong Bad, with Strong Bad E-mail 185 {pronounced one eighty-five}. Thanks for listening.

{New Paper comes down}

Easter Eggs

"Try NOT to stab yourself!"

• Click on "Josh CO" to see "The Stab Yourself!" product from joshCO!
• At the end, click on "rotten" to see an ad for Spicy Crispy Chicken Melt.

  {A bag with Blubb-O's logo appears on a red background. A logo for the product appears above it as the announcer speaks.}

  ANNOUNCER: Mmmintroducing the Spicy Crispy Chicken Melt. Because you people stopped buying the Crispy Chicken Melt.

• At the end, click on "asleep" to see a scene at the Hill.

  HOMESTAR RUNNER: {asleep} Okay, girls. We're stuck in the woods, with no troop leader. It's time to decide who we eat first. {holds up the kazoo and opens his mouth as if about to eat it}

• At the end, click on "nightlife" to see a scene with the King Of Town in his castle.

  THE KING OF TOWN: I call to order this meeting of Club Technochocolate. As you can see here, {holds up a motherboard dipped in chocolate} I dipped this motherboard in 70% cacao!

Fun Facts

Explanations

• Smart drinks are non-alcoholic drinks made from juice and supplemented with herbal extracts and other ingredients. They were a fad in the rave and club scenes during the early '90s.
• A pink elephant is used as a visual shorthand that someone is drunk. There is no standard cocktail called a Pink Elephant Pants, but a Pink Elephant is usually made from gin and grenadine.
• Cacao is the name for the tree from whose seeds chocolate is made. Indicating the percentage of cacao in a recipe is a common marketing convention for gourmet dark chocolates.
• Sleepwalking is a nocturnal disorder in which a sleeping individual engages in behavior normally done while awake.
• A thin mint is one of several varieties of cookies which are commonly sold by Girl Scouts as a fundraiser for their organization.

Trivia

• The summary for the Podstar Runner RSS feed reads, "Strong Bad describes a night out at Club Technochocolate."

Remarks

• This is the first time that Strong Bad's room has appeared in something other than Easter eggs and secret pages.
• In Summer Short Shorts, Bubs' Concession Stand was located to the right of Strong Badia. In the Carrot and Kazoo Hill scene of this email, however, the locations are reversed.
• The Carrot and Kazoo Hill scene has the old round bushes that used to be displayed in the Field.
• Girl Scouts actually are in troops named by numbers; e.g. 577, 581, etc.
• This marks the first time that shows Bubs moving his arms by bending them around other than at the elbows.
  • However, when Bubs is dancing, his elbow joints are still visible. The bendy-armed Bubs does not appear until the scene at the counter.
• Strong Bad's comment about wearing body spray is another blatant lie.
• Strong Bad applies his body spray without pressing down on the nozzle of the aerosol can.
• When the toons menu preview is viewed on the Wii internet channel, only the back wall and the Club Technochocolate sign are visible. The rest is static.
• In the Podstar Runner version of the email, the flyer for Club Technochocolate does not appear. The screen instead freezes on Strong Bad until the cut to his bedroom. Strong Bad does not continue typing at this point even though he does continue to talk.
• Strong Bad spells "bona fide" as a single word.

Goofs

• As Strong Bad types "This has been Strong Bad", the text cursor goes outside the Lappy's screen very briefly.
• When Homestar leans back while talking to Strong Bad, a section of his robe has no back for a few frames.

Fixed Goofs

• Originally, as Bubs glided in behind the bar, his middle section was elevated slightly above the level of the bar but his legs were noticeably absent. This was fixed by Tuesday.

Inside References

• Strong Mad smiles after he tells his joke.
• The Blubb-O's bag features the Drive-Thru Whale. "Blubb-O's" was previously mentioned in the DVD commentary for Drive-Thru.
• Strong Bad is shown wearing leopard-print underwear after he loses his pants.
• Pants, alcohol, and elephants figure prominently in the email.
• "Light-èd floors" is another instance of the -èd pronunciation.
• Strong Bad refers to his body spray as "the blood of slain warrior mammoths".
• The King of Town's motherboard and sleeping Homestar's kazoo are both non-food items about to be eaten.
• Strong Bad's dance moves and the music that plays when the flyer appears onscreen are both from the Technochocolate scene of disconnected.
• Bubs's dance moves are from Dancin' Bubs.
• Marzipan's dance moves are from the dance contest in replacement.
• Pom Pom's dance moves are from geddup noise.
• Homestar dreaming that he is a Girl Scout is another instance of gender confusion.
• Homestar has cinnamon on his chin.
• Strong Sad says that Club Technochocolate is his favorite place to go to and not dance.
• Thin mints were previously mentioned in rough copy.
• When talking to Marzipan about not dancing, Strong Sad smiles.
• The motherboard in the King of Town Easter egg is the same one seen in The System Is Down.

Real-World References

• Troop Beverly Hills is a 1989 movie starring Shelley Long as a clueless debutante housewife trying to run a Girl Scout troop.
• Homestar Runner is wearing professional wrestler Roddy Piper's "Hot Rod" T-shirt.
• The "another email for another time" line is a reference to the "But that is another story, to be told another time" line which concludes The Neverending Story.

Fast Forward

• The Blubb-O's bag was seen again in Blubb-O's Commercial.
• Strong Bad says a line similar to "I need the brightest, glowiest drink in the house." in Strong Badia the Free.

DVD Version

• The DVD version features hidden creators' commentary. To access it, switch the DVD player's audio language selection while watching.

Commentary Transcript

(Commentary by: Homestar Runner, Mike Chapman)

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {sleepy sigh, mumbling}

MIKE: Homestar.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {bigger sleepy sigh, more mumbling}

MIKE: Homestar, wake up! We're do—

HOMESTAR RUNNER: What? {questioning mumbles}

MIKE: We're doing commentary for an email here.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {overlapping} Five cents!

MIKE: Five—?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: F—fourteen cents!

MIKE: Uhh...

HOMESTAR RUNNER: A million cents.

MIKE: Okay.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {slurring his speech} Don't got a million cents...

MIKE: Homestar! It's Mike!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: But you... but you need a million ce—

MIKE: {overlapping} Hey! S—

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {apparently being finally woken up} What— wha— HEY! Whoa!

MIKE: School time!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: What are we doin' here?

MIKE: We are doing commentary for this Strong Bad Email about the nightlife.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: You put me in a box.

MIKE: {laughs} Uh... that's a chair.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Oh... oh! Nice box.

MIKE: {chuckling} Thanks, it's a chair.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {the email shows Carrot and Kazoo Hill} Ooh! That was the hottest time I ever had! Man, me and Strong Sad really tore up Carrot and Kazoo Hill that night.

MIKE: You were kinda defying gravity a little bit, it looked like.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Maaan, you should see me lean.

MIKE: {overlapping} It looks like you shoulda been tumbling down... the hill.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: A-tumblin' down?

MIKE: Mm-hm.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: You should see me lean! Watch me lean. {singing operatically} Aahhh!

MIKE: Wow! You're like one of those fun houses.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah! You should see me fun house! {Mike chuckles; pause} Umm...

MIKE: Have you ever been in—

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {interrupting} Do you think Strong Bad got that shirt at, like, some... some local boutique?

MIKE: {laughs} He might have.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Is that tree silkscreened onto it?

MIKE: Probably is.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {simultaneously} Hand-silkscreen?

MIKE: Probably cost him about a hundred and twelve dollars?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Did it get it from an Etsy shop?

MIKE: He m— {chuckling} He might've.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {referring to Strong Bad's body spray} Man, he's really layin' it on pretty thick there. {Mike clicks his tongue in agreement} Why didn't he...

MIKE: How did you get past the security this— at the party club? Club Technochocolate?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I don't think I went to the party club, what are you talkin' about, Mike?

MIKE: I think you... I think you did!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: No, I stayed home in bed this night.

MIKE: {laughing} Oh-ho, okay.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah, what... what are you talkin' about?

MIKE: I'll... sorry, I dunno— I dunno what I'm talkin' about.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I prob'ly cleverly talked my way through it. {Mike snickers} Y'know. Like... {imitating his monotone sleepy voice} A zap roast. Lemme have a zap roast.

MIKE: A zap {chuckling} roast?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah. That's what I call it when you put a roast in the microwave. {Mike laughs} "Lemme get a... a large zap roast..." {Mike laughs} "Strong Mad," I'd say. Ohh. This is a nice jam.

MIKE: Uh-huh.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: It's about smart drinks.

MIKE: 'd ya ever have a smart drink?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: What defines a smart drink, Mike? {Mike starts to say something} I feel like they never really got their time... to shine in the spotlight.

MIKE: {overlapping, laughing} No, they didn't. I think... they were kinda pre-Red Bull. I feel like.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah. Yeah, I {unintelligible}—

MIKE: {overlapping} And I think that— energy drinks kinda just... overshadowed 'em.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: But... why did the— the— the focus shift from needing to be smart... to needing to have a lot of energy?

MIKE: Well, if you're tired, it doesn't matter if you're smart or not, y'know? But if you're sleepin' all the time...

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {overlapping} But if you're smart, you should be able to figure out ways... to stay... not tired.

MIKE: Ohh.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I like Strong Sad's pantyhose.

MIKE: {laughs} Those— those are—

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {interrupting} Looks like he reached into some pantyhose!

MIKE: {laughs} Yeah?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah.

MIKE: He broke right through. With his fingertips?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah. I bet he just drew those on, though, with a Sharpie. What do you think, Mike?

MIKE: He might've. They look pretty... pretty well-drawn.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah.

MIKE: {overlapping} But that's the kind of thing Strong Sad would spend like four days doing, maybe.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Did you ever know anybody that would, like... liked to go out to the... dance club...

MIKE: {interrupting, referring to Homestar onscreen} See—

HOMESTAR RUNNER: ...but then wouldn't dance?

MIKE: Uh, yeah.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah. That's Strong Sad.

MIKE: Oh, look! Look at you!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {incredulously} What?

MIKE: See—? there you are!

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Wait a minute!

MIKE: I told you—

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I told you I stayed at home this night!

MIKE: I kn— {laughing} I know you did.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Where did you get this footage?!

MIKE: {laughs} Uh... I— I—

HOMESTAR RUNNER: What do I... talkin' about?

MIKE: You're talking about Girl Scouts.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: No. That's not true.

MIKE: I think you must've been—

HOMESTAR RUNNER: I must—

MIKE: You were dreaming about being a Girl Scout.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: No. I musta been dreamin' about... Knives 'n' Guns... Scouts.

MIKE: Uhhh...

HOMESTAR RUNNER: They sell Thin— Thin Mints is short for... Turbo-Heated... Intro-Nuclear... Mother... In... No... Tank! {Mike laughs} Mike. THIN MINT. {Mike laughs} I prolly w— drove one o' those... here to the club.

MIKE: Uh, something something something tank?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah.

MIKE: All right. I don't remember any of the other things. Although I think "mother", maybe, was one of the words?

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Yeah, {laughing} "No Mother".

MIKE: {laughs} "No Mother"...

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Look at, uh... did you see Strong Bad's, um... {Mike laughs} pantalones?

MIKE: I did.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Those were... rough.

MIKE: They were... {laughs} a little rough on the eyes. I s— had to squint.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: That is too bad. He had some stiff pants. Did you see those stiff pants {Mike laughs and starts to say something} stick to his head?

MIKE: Uh-huh.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Those had some natural starch... {Mike laughs} in them, I think.

Fun Facts

• Etsy is a website that specializes in selling eclectic handmade clothes, handicrafts and the like.
• Red Bull is an energy drink frequently mixed with alcohol in nightclubs.

External Links

• watch "nightlife"
• watch "nightlife" on the old Flash site
• view the Flash file for "nightlife"
• forum thread re: "nightlife"