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| https://web.archive.org/web/20211001000000im_/http://www.hrwiki.org/w/images/thumb/4/41/Subtitles_Project_Logo.png/80px-Subtitles_Project_Logo.png'''WM0'''
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'''These are the [[English language|English]] subtitles for [[Doomy Tales of the Macabre]].''' [https://homestarrunner.com/ween09.html watch this toon]
'''[[HRWiki:Subtitles|HRWikiSubtitlesProject]]'''
To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the '''[[User:Phlip/Greasemonkey|All-In-One Greasemonkey script]]''' for Firefox or the '''[https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/homestar-all-in-one/ekecfcebbojjfaiendgjgcadampmppdb Homestar All-In-One extension]''' for Chrome.<br />It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on [https://homestarrunner.com/ homestarrunner.com] and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our [http://subtitles.hrwiki.org/ween09/en local viewer].
 
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| '''These are the [[English language|English]] subtitles for [[Doomy Tales of the Macabre]].''' <span class="hovul" style="font-size:smaller;background:#EEE;border:1px #999 solid;padding:2px;margin-left:6px;white-space:nowrap">[https://homestarrunner.com/ween09.html watch this toon]</span>
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To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the '''[[User:Phlip/Greasemonkey|All-In-One Greasemonkey script]]''' for Firefox or the '''[https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/homestar-all-in-one/ekecfcebbojjfaiendgjgcadampmppdb Homestar All-In-One extension]''' for Chrome.<br />
It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on [https://homestarrunner.com/ homestarrunner.com] and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our [http://subtitles.hrwiki.org/ween09/en local viewer].
 
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<div class="hovul" style="font-size:70%; text-align:right;">
'''en''' 
 
[[Subtitles:ween09/de|de]] 
'''en'''  [[Subtitles:ween09/de|de]]  [[Subtitles:ween09/he|he]]  [[Subtitles:ween09/es|es]]  [[Subtitles:ween09/fr|fr]]  [[Subtitles:ween09/nl|nl]]  [[Subtitles:ween09/fi|fi]]  [[Subtitles:ween09/pl|pl]]  [[Subtitles:ween09/pt-br|pt-br]]  [[Subtitles:ween09/tr|tr]]
[[Subtitles:ween09/he|he]] 
 
[[Subtitles:ween09/es|es]] 
</div>
[[Subtitles:ween09/fr|fr]] 
<pre>&lt;?xml version=&quot;1.0&quot; encoding=&quot;utf-8&quot;?&gt;
[[Subtitles:ween09/nl|nl]] 
&lt;transcript xml:lang=&quot;en-us&quot; file=&quot;ween09.swf&quot; width=&quot;550&quot; height=&quot;400&quot;&gt;
[[Subtitles:ween09/fi|fi]] 
  &lt;line start=&quot;21&quot; end=&quot;22&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;O&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;ne chillèd Hallow's Eve I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
[[Subtitles:ween09/pl|pl]] 
  &lt;line start=&quot;22&quot; end=&quot;23&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;On&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;e chillèd Hallow's Eve I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
[[Subtitles:ween09/pt-br|pt-br]] 
  &lt;line start=&quot;23&quot; end=&quot;25&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt; chillèd Hallow's Eve I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
[[Subtitles:ween09/tr|tr]]
  &lt;line start=&quot;25&quot; end=&quot;26&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One c&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;hillèd Hallow's Eve I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;26&quot; end=&quot;27&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One ch&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;illèd Hallow's Eve I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;27&quot; end=&quot;28&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chi&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;llèd Hallow's Eve I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;28&quot; end=&quot;29&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chill&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;èd Hallow's Eve I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;30&quot; end=&quot;32&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chillèd&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt; Hallow's Eve I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;32&quot; end=&quot;34&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chillèd H&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;allow's Eve I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;34&quot; end=&quot;35&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chillèd Ha&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;llow's Eve I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;35&quot; end=&quot;36&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chillèd Hall&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;ow's Eve I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;36&quot; end=&quot;37&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chillèd Hallo&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;w's Eve I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;37&quot; end=&quot;38&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chillèd Hallow'&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;s Eve I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;38&quot; end=&quot;40&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chillèd Hallow's&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt; Eve I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;40&quot; end=&quot;41&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chillèd Hallow's E&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;ve I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;41&quot; end=&quot;42&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chillèd Hallow's Ev&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;e I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;42&quot; end=&quot;44&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chillèd Hallow's Eve&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt; I rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;44&quot; end=&quot;45&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chillèd Hallow's Eve I&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt; rose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;45&quot; end=&quot;46&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chillèd Hallow's Eve I r&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;ose&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;46&quot; end=&quot;47&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chillèd Hallow's Eve I ro&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;se&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;47&quot; end=&quot;48&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chillèd Hallow's Eve I ros&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;e&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;48&quot; end=&quot;50&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One chillèd Hallow's Eve I rose&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;50&quot; end=&quot;86&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;and sat right down to writing.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;86&quot; end=&quot;124&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;For none had bothered to propose,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;124&quot; end=&quot;136&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;to their parties, my inviting.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;136&quot; end=&quot;143&quot;&gt;
    &lt;strongsad&gt;to their parties, my inviting.&lt;/strongsad&gt;
    &lt;sfx&gt;smack&lt;/sfx&gt;
  &lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;143&quot; end=&quot;152&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;to their parties, my inviting.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;156&quot; end=&quot;197&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;So I crafted such a macabre tale&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;197&quot; end=&quot;229&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;there in my darkened room&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;229&quot; end=&quot;258&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;To achieve literary justice,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;258&quot; end=&quot;280&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;and send each &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;to their DOOOOM!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;280&quot; end=&quot;300&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;and send each to their DOOOOM!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;433&quot; end=&quot;470&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;We start with the most expendable.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;470&quot; end=&quot;498&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;Grrrreetings, King of Town!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;498&quot; end=&quot;512&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;For this glutton, &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;a stew of mutton&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;512&quot; end=&quot;531&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;For this glutton, a stew of mutton&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;531&quot; end=&quot;560&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;in which to slowly drown!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;560&quot; end=&quot;595&quot; speaker=&quot;kingoftown&quot;&gt;I thought these were tales of the McArby!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;595&quot; end=&quot;660&quot; speaker=&quot;kingoftown&quot;&gt;the mythical fast-food crossover sandwich of legend!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;679&quot; end=&quot;720&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;What's this? The fair maid Marzipan&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;720&quot; end=&quot;756&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;considering a brand new man?&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;756&quot; end=&quot;790&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Marzipan! Have you seen my toenail clippings?&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;790&quot; end=&quot;817&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;I left them right on top of your toothbrush.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;820&quot; end=&quot;851&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;Crystal, crystal, on the ball,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;851&quot; end=&quot;873&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;I need a better boyfriend, y'all! &lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;873&quot; end=&quot;910&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;But the gypsy forces she invoked&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;910&quot; end=&quot;943&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;decided they would play a joke!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;946&quot; end=&quot;972&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;AaaaaaaaAAAAAAA&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;AAAAARRAOOOOOORR!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;972&quot; end=&quot;997&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;AaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAARRAOOOOOORR!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1000&quot; end=&quot;1095&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;Hey there, my little love jorb! These bunions, corns, and calluses aren't gonna pumice themselves! &lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1096&quot; end=&quot;1115&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;Nuuuuuuu... &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;Oh, wait, what's that say? &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1116&quot; end=&quot;1131&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;Nuuuuuuu... Oh, wait, what's that say?&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1136&quot; end=&quot;1158&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;Nooooooooo!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1160&quot; end=&quot;1187&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;And now we join a man obs—&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1188&quot; end=&quot;1211&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;Hey, what abrat my doom?&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1212&quot; end=&quot;1274&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;Um, you're already Coach Z. No sense in beating a dead horse.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1277&quot; end=&quot;1289&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;Hey, good point!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1306&quot; end=&quot;1371&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;And now we join a man obsessed with sales and liquidation,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1372&quot; end=&quot;1434&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;dabbling with fiendish tests and genetic experimentation.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1436&quot; end=&quot;1471&quot; speaker=&quot;bubs&quot;&gt;I'll just take this piece of brain from my wig...&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1481&quot; end=&quot;1538&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;But you all know how these things go, with unnatural creations.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1542&quot; end=&quot;1555&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongsad voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;A puff of smoke! &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;A greenish glow! Voila! Horrible abomination!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strongsad&gt;
&lt;sfx&gt;poof&lt;/sfx&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1556&quot; end=&quot;1571&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongsad voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;A puff of smoke! A greenish glow! &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;Voila! Horrible abomination!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strongsad&gt;
&lt;sfx&gt;strange pulsating noise&lt;/sfx&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1572&quot; end=&quot;1581&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongsad voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;A puff of smoke! A greenish glow! Voila! &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;Horrible abomination!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strongsad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1582&quot; end=&quot;1609&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongsad voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;A puff of smoke! A greenish glow! Voila! Horrible abomination!&lt;/strongsad&gt;
&lt;sfx&gt;boom&lt;/sfx&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1610&quot; end=&quot;1614&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongsad voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;A puff of smoke! A greenish glow! Voila! Horrible abomination!&lt;/strongsad&gt;
&lt;sfx&gt;roar&lt;/sfx&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1615&quot; end=&quot;1626&quot;&gt;&lt;other&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;buffer&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/other&gt;&lt;sfx&gt;roar&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1627&quot; end=&quot;1639&quot;&gt;
&lt;bubs&gt;Aw, this was supposed to reduce my overhead! Not turn into my head!&lt;/bubs&gt;
&lt;sfx&gt;roar&lt;/sfx&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1640&quot; end=&quot;1685&quot;&gt;
&lt;bubs&gt;Aw, this was supposed to reduce my overhead! Not turn into my head!&lt;/bubs&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1706&quot; end=&quot;1749&quot; speaker=&quot;onionbubs&quot;&gt;Welcome to my world! Ehhhhh-heheheheheheeeeeeeh!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1773&quot; end=&quot;1844&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;These two no-talkers need to go! Let's eliminate a Poopsmith O!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1873&quot; end=&quot;1883&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;Pumping noises&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1884&quot; end=&quot;1892&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;Bam&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1906&quot; end=&quot;1991&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;Oh, uh, and Pom Pom was filled with a deadly gas... that killed the Popsmith... really... fast.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2016&quot; end=&quot;2069&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;Crushed once by a Heavy Lourde in sbemail number two.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2070&quot; end=&quot;2132&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;To keep this little weirdo dead, only a heavy gourd will do!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2133&quot; end=&quot;2193&quot; speaker=&quot;homsar&quot;&gt;My punjab has a pretty price-tag!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2240&quot; end=&quot;2335&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;Homestar Runner, fast, like the whind, but how fast can he run when his knees can't bend?&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2336&quot; end=&quot;2401&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Oooh! Hey, this ain't so bad! Gives me the good thoughts, you know.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2405&quot; end=&quot;2483&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;Well, I'll revise, then, if you please. What if each leg had several knees?&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2496&quot; end=&quot;2541&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Hey, great! It's like I'm wadin' through puddin' with every step!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2542&quot; end=&quot;2588&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;And everyone knows how much the Homestar Runner loves wadin' through puddin'.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2591&quot; end=&quot;2648&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Strong Sad, these doomy tales of macrame aren't very scary.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2649&quot; end=&quot;2672&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;Oh, there's an idea!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2673&quot; end=&quot;2752&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;A crafty fad, once loved by all. I'll hang you on a 70's basement wall!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2755&quot; end=&quot;2817&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Oh no! Macrame! My worst nightmare!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2818&quot; end=&quot;2882&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;But Macrame Owl Homestar, I give you a macrame dream catcher for Decemberween every year.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2884&quot; end=&quot;2913&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;My point exactlyyyyyyy!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2935&quot; end=&quot;2980&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;Get back upstairs and cook my seventies dinner, woman!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2981&quot; end=&quot;3016&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;And put on a pantsuit, fer cryin' out loud!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;3018&quot; end=&quot;3079&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;Halloween is very handy, for those with appetites for candy.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;3080&quot; end=&quot;3115&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;Except for greedy trick-or-treaters...&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;3116&quot; end=&quot;3157&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;Like Strong Mad and The Cheat... &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;er...&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;3158&quot; end=&quot;3173&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;Like Strong Mad and The Cheat... er...&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;3174&quot; end=&quot;3209&quot; speaker=&quot;strongmad&quot;&gt;CHECK OUT MY NEW TREAT BAG!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;3210&quot; end=&quot;3226&quot; speaker=&quot;thecheat&quot;&gt;The Cheat noises&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;3228&quot; end=&quot;3301&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;All night long, they gathered sweets, and tossed upon the growing heap!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;3302&quot; end=&quot;3374&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;When finally struck the midnight hour, 'twas not just candy he devoured!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;3375&quot; end=&quot;3457&quot; speaker=&quot;strongmad&quot;&gt;Phoo! Gah! THE CHEAT? NOOOOOO!!!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;3458&quot; end=&quot;3536&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;That's not macabre! Strong Mad eats The Cheat like four times a day! How do you think we give him baths?&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;3537&quot; end=&quot;3602&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;Oh, fine! Well, I saved the most &lt;em&gt;macabre&lt;/em&gt; for last!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;3603&quot; end=&quot;3647&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;I'd like to see you get macabré on mé!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;3648&quot; end=&quot;3716&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;Strong Bad, as he always does, checks emails from his fans,&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;3717&quot; end=&quot;3749&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;what if, instead of boxing gloves,&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;3750&quot; end=&quot;3784&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;a pair of human hands?!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;3789&quot; end=&quot;3873&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Aaahhh! I'm hideous! How will I ever type with these waggly knuckled monstrosities?!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;3902&quot; end=&quot;3964&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Now all have met their grisly fate, such horrors for you to see.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;3965&quot; end=&quot;4027&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Perchance next time they'll all think twice before not inviting me!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4038&quot; end=&quot;4075&quot; speaker=&quot;all&quot;&gt;Happy Halloween, Strong Sad!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4076&quot; end=&quot;4140&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;A surprise party? Just for me?! Oh, you guys shouldn't have!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4141&quot; end=&quot;4171&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;You all really do care!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4183&quot; end=&quot;4192&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;bam&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4197&quot; end=&quot;4257&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Oh. Heh, heh, you weren't really supposed to see that, uh...&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4258&quot; end=&quot;4286&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Let's just flick the light back off, shall we?&lt;/line&gt;
 
&lt;!--Easter eggs--&gt;
 
&lt;line start=&quot;4454&quot; end=&quot;4482&quot; speaker=&quot;bubs&quot;&gt;Hey, Coach Z, you seen my wallet?&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4484&quot; end=&quot;4506&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;Well, what does it look like?&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4508&quot; end=&quot;4549&quot; speaker=&quot;bubs&quot;&gt;It's the one that says &quot;Bad business practices&quot;.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4559&quot; end=&quot;4700&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;Say, Marzipan, peep this: &quot;You take two steps frorward and I'll take two steps back.&quot; Huh? No? I'm a cold-hearted snake? Rush rush? The Laker girls?&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4705&quot; end=&quot;4753&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;All right, I'm just gonna save everybody some time and burn through these.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4754&quot; end=&quot;4787&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Pom Pom? Underwater orange juice man? Classic.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4788&quot; end=&quot;4840&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Strong Bad? Scarecrow and Mrs. King? I would've preferred Jake and the Fat Man, but nice work.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4841&quot; end=&quot;4882&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;The Cheat as the thorax? Love it. Favorite part of the insect.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4883&quot; end=&quot;4929&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Coach Z? Not sure if I wanna know the answer to this, but did you steal Mickey Mouse's pants?&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4930&quot; end=&quot;4967&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Marzipan, off-duty Ronald McDonald? It is what it is.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;4968&quot; end=&quot;5007&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;And finally, Homestar, you seem to be distraught.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;5012&quot; end=&quot;5066&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;People try and make me sound a lot... weird, y'know, and I'm strong!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;5067&quot; end=&quot;5091&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;And I can... kick...&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;5107&quot; end=&quot;5161&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;The King of Town ate the colonel's mustard, and the rope, and the parlor.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;5165&quot; end=&quot;5203&quot; speaker=&quot;kingoftown&quot;&gt;I admit to only two thirds of that statement!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;5214&quot; end=&quot;5263&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Run, Marzipan, Run—off of a cliff, preferably.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;5266&quot; end=&quot;5295&quot; speaker=&quot;marzipan&quot;&gt;&lt;i&gt;(gasps)&lt;/i&gt; You Kinder Überraschung!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;5308&quot; end=&quot;5386&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;&lt;em&gt;(Sings Saria's song from The Legend Of Zelda: Ocarina of Time slightly off-key)&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;5396&quot; end=&quot;5488&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Oh, the evil moon is crashing into the Earth again! What a totally un-frustrating way to play a video game!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;5499&quot; end=&quot;5521&quot; speaker=&quot;strongmad&quot;&gt;MOVE-A MOVE-A!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;/transcript&gt;</pre>
<div id="catlinks" class="catlinks">
 
<div id="mw-normal-catlinks">


[/wiki/Special:Categories Category]: <span dir="ltr">[[Category:English Subtitles|English Subtitles]]</span>
<pre>
<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="ween09.swf" width="550" height="400">
  <line start="21" end="22" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">O<span style="visibility:hidden">ne chillèd Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="22" end="23" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">On<span style="visibility:hidden">e chillèd Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="23" end="25" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One<span style="visibility:hidden"> chillèd Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="25" end="26" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One c<span style="visibility:hidden">hillèd Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="26" end="27" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One ch<span style="visibility:hidden">illèd Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="27" end="28" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chi<span style="visibility:hidden">llèd Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="28" end="29" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chill<span style="visibility:hidden">èd Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="30" end="32" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd<span style="visibility:hidden"> Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="32" end="34" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd H<span style="visibility:hidden">allow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="34" end="35" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Ha<span style="visibility:hidden">llow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="35" end="36" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hall<span style="visibility:hidden">ow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="36" end="37" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallo<span style="visibility:hidden">w's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="37" end="38" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow'<span style="visibility:hidden">s Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="38" end="40" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's<span style="visibility:hidden"> Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="40" end="41" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's E<span style="visibility:hidden">ve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="41" end="42" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's Ev<span style="visibility:hidden">e I rose</span></line>
  <line start="42" end="44" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's Eve<span style="visibility:hidden"> I rose</span></line>
  <line start="44" end="45" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's Eve I<span style="visibility:hidden"> rose</span></line>
  <line start="45" end="46" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's Eve I r<span style="visibility:hidden">ose</span></line>
  <line start="46" end="47" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's Eve I ro<span style="visibility:hidden">se</span></line>
  <line start="47" end="48" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's Eve I ros<span style="visibility:hidden">e</span></line>
  <line start="48" end="50" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's Eve I rose</line>
  <line start="50" end="86" speaker="strongsad">and sat right down to writing.</line>
  <line start="86" end="124" speaker="strongsad">For none had bothered to propose,</line>
  <line start="124" end="136" speaker="strongsad">to their parties, my inviting.</line>
  <line start="136" end="143">
    <strongsad>to their parties, my inviting.</strongsad>
    <sfx>smack</sfx>
  </line>
  <line start="143" end="152" speaker="strongsad">to their parties, my inviting.</line>
  <line start="156" end="197" speaker="strongsad">So I crafted such a macabre tale</line>
  <line start="197" end="229" speaker="strongsad">there in my darkened room</line>
  <line start="229" end="258" speaker="strongsad">To achieve literary justice,</line>
  <line start="258" end="280" speaker="strongsad">and send each <span style="visibility:hidden">to their DOOOOM!</span></line>
  <line start="280" end="300" speaker="strongsad">and send each to their DOOOOM!</line>
  <line start="433" end="470" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">We start with the most expendable.</line>
  <line start="470" end="498" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Grrrreetings, King of Town!</line>
  <line start="498" end="512" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">For this glutton, <span style="visibility:hidden">a stew of mutton</span></line>
  <line start="512" end="531" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">For this glutton, a stew of mutton</line>
  <line start="531" end="560" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">in which to slowly drown!</line>
  <line start="560" end="595" speaker="kingoftown">I thought these were tales of the McArby!</line>
  <line start="595" end="660" speaker="kingoftown">the mythical fast-food crossover sandwich of legend!</line>
  <line start="679" end="720" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">What's this? The fair maid Marzipan</line>
  <line start="720" end="756" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">considering a brand new man?</line>
  <line start="756" end="790" speaker="homestar">Marzipan! Have you seen my toenail clippings?</line>
  <line start="790" end="817" speaker="homestar">I left them right on top of your toothbrush.</line>
  <line start="820" end="851" speaker="marzipan">Crystal, crystal, on the ball,</line>
  <line start="851" end="873" speaker="marzipan">I need a better boyfriend, y'all! </line>
  <line start="873" end="910" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">But the gypsy forces she invoked</line>
  <line start="910" end="943" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">decided they would play a joke!</line>
  <line start="946" end="972" speaker="homestar">AaaaaaaaAAAAAAA<span style="visibility:hidden">AAAAARRAOOOOOORR!</span></line>
  <line start="972" end="997" speaker="coachz">AaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAARRAOOOOOORR!</line>
  <line start="1000" end="1095" speaker="coachz">Hey there, my little love jorb! These bunions, corns, and calluses aren't gonna pumice themselves! </line>
  <line start="1096" end="1115" speaker="marzipan">Nuuuuuuu... <span style="visibility:hidden">Oh, wait, what's that say? </span></line>
  <line start="1116" end="1131" speaker="marzipan">Nuuuuuuu... Oh, wait, what's that say?</line>
  <line start="1136" end="1158" speaker="marzipan">Nooooooooo!</line>
  <line start="1160" end="1187" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">And now we join a man obs—</line>
  <line start="1188" end="1211" speaker="coachz">Hey, what abrat my doom?</line>
  <line start="1212" end="1274" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Um, you're already Coach Z. No sense in beating a dead horse.</line>
  <line start="1277" end="1289" speaker="coachz">Hey, good point!</line>
  <line start="1306" end="1371" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">And now we join a man obsessed with sales and liquidation,</line>
  <line start="1372" end="1434" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">dabbling with fiendish tests and genetic experimentation.</line>
  <line start="1436" end="1471" speaker="bubs">I'll just take this piece of brain from my wig...</line>
  <line start="1481" end="1538" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">But you all know how these things go, with unnatural creations.</line>
  <line start="1542" end="1555">
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">A puff of smoke! <span style="visibility:hidden">A greenish glow! Voila! Horrible abomination!</span></strongsad>
<sfx>poof</sfx>
</line>
  <line start="1556" end="1571">
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">A puff of smoke! A greenish glow! <span style="visibility:hidden">Voila! Horrible abomination!</span></strongsad>
<sfx>strange pulsating noise</sfx>
</line>
  <line start="1572" end="1581">
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">A puff of smoke! A greenish glow! Voila! <span style="visibility:hidden">Horrible abomination!</span></strongsad>
</line>
  <line start="1582" end="1609">
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">A puff of smoke! A greenish glow! Voila! Horrible abomination!</strongsad>
<sfx>boom</sfx>
</line>
  <line start="1610" end="1614">
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">A puff of smoke! A greenish glow! Voila! Horrible abomination!</strongsad>
<sfx>roar</sfx>
</line>
  <line start="1615" end="1626"><other><span style="visibility:hidden">buffer</span></other><sfx>roar</sfx></line>
  <line start="1627" end="1639">
<bubs>Aw, this was supposed to reduce my overhead! Not turn into my head!</bubs>
<sfx>roar</sfx>
</line>
  <line start="1640" end="1685">
<bubs>Aw, this was supposed to reduce my overhead! Not turn into my head!</bubs>
</line>
  <line start="1706" end="1749" speaker="onionbubs">Welcome to my world! Ehhhhh-heheheheheheeeeeeeh!</line>
  <line start="1773" end="1844" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">These two no-talkers need to go! Let's eliminate a Poopsmith O!</line>
  <line start="1873" end="1883" speaker="sfx">Pumping noises</line>
  <line start="1884" end="1892" speaker="sfx">Bam</line>
  <line start="1906" end="1991" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Oh, uh, and Pom Pom was filled with a deadly gas... that killed the Popsmith... really... fast.</line>
  <line start="2016" end="2069" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Crushed once by a Heavy Lourde in sbemail number two.</line>
  <line start="2070" end="2132" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">To keep this little weirdo dead, only a heavy gourd will do!</line>
  <line start="2133" end="2193" speaker="homsar">My punjab has a pretty price-tag!</line>
  <line start="2240" end="2335" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Homestar Runner, fast, like the whind, but how fast can he run when his knees can't bend?</line>
  <line start="2336" end="2401" speaker="homestar">Oooh! Hey, this ain't so bad! Gives me the good thoughts, you know.</line>
  <line start="2405" end="2483" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Well, I'll revise, then, if you please. What if each leg had several knees?</line>
  <line start="2496" end="2541" speaker="homestar">Hey, great! It's like I'm wadin' through puddin' with every step!</line>
  <line start="2542" end="2588" speaker="homestar">And everyone knows how much the Homestar Runner loves wadin' through puddin'.</line>
  <line start="2591" end="2648" speaker="homestar">Strong Sad, these doomy tales of macrame aren't very scary.</line>
  <line start="2649" end="2672" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Oh, there's an idea!</line>
  <line start="2673" end="2752" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">A crafty fad, once loved by all. I'll hang you on a 70's basement wall!</line>
  <line start="2755" end="2817" speaker="homestar">Oh no! Macrame! My worst nightmare!</line>
  <line start="2818" end="2882" speaker="marzipan">But Macrame Owl Homestar, I give you a macrame dream catcher for Decemberween every year.</line>
  <line start="2884" end="2913" speaker="homestar">My point exactlyyyyyyy!</line>
  <line start="2935" end="2980" speaker="coachz">Get back upstairs and cook my seventies dinner, woman!</line>
  <line start="2981" end="3016" speaker="coachz">And put on a pantsuit, fer cryin' out loud!</line>
  <line start="3018" end="3079" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Halloween is very handy, for those with appetites for candy.</line>
  <line start="3080" end="3115" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Except for greedy trick-or-treaters...</line>
  <line start="3116" end="3157" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Like Strong Mad and The Cheat... <span style="visibility:hidden">er...</span></line>
  <line start="3158" end="3173" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Like Strong Mad and The Cheat... er...</line>
  <line start="3174" end="3209" speaker="strongmad">CHECK OUT MY NEW TREAT BAG!</line>
  <line start="3210" end="3226" speaker="thecheat">The Cheat noises</line>
  <line start="3228" end="3301" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">All night long, they gathered sweets, and tossed upon the growing heap!</line>
  <line start="3302" end="3374" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">When finally struck the midnight hour, 'twas not just candy he devoured!</line>
  <line start="3375" end="3457" speaker="strongmad">Phoo! Gah! THE CHEAT? NOOOOOO!!!</line>
  <line start="3458" end="3536" speaker="strongbad">That's not macabre! Strong Mad eats The Cheat like four times a day! How do you think we give him baths?</line>
  <line start="3537" end="3602" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Oh, fine! Well, I saved the most <em>macabre</em> for last!</line>
  <line start="3603" end="3647" speaker="strongbad">I'd like to see you get macabré on mé!</line>
<line start="3648" end="3716" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Strong Bad, as he always does, checks emails from his fans,</line>
<line start="3717" end="3749" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">what if, instead of boxing gloves,</line>
<line start="3750" end="3784" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">a pair of human hands?!</line>
<line start="3789" end="3873" speaker="strongbad">Aaahhh! I'm hideous! How will I ever type with these waggly knuckled monstrosities?!</line>
<line start="3902" end="3964" speaker="strongsad">Now all have met their grisly fate, such horrors for you to see.</line>
<line start="3965" end="4027" speaker="strongsad">Perchance next time they'll all think twice before not inviting me!</line>
<line start="4038" end="4075" speaker="all">Happy Halloween, Strong Sad!</line>
<line start="4076" end="4140" speaker="strongsad">A surprise party? Just for me?! Oh, you guys shouldn't have!</line>
<line start="4141" end="4171" speaker="strongsad">You all really do care!</line>
<line start="4183" end="4192" speaker="sfx">bam</line>
<line start="4197" end="4257" speaker="strongsad">Oh. Heh, heh, you weren't really supposed to see that, uh...</line>
<line start="4258" end="4286" speaker="strongsad">Let's just flick the light back off, shall we?</line>


</div>
<!--Easter eggs-->


</div>
<line start="4454" end="4482" speaker="bubs">Hey, Coach Z, you seen my wallet?</line>
<line start="4484" end="4506" speaker="coachz">Well, what does it look like?</line>
<line start="4508" end="4549" speaker="bubs">It's the one that says "Bad business practices".</line>
<line start="4559" end="4700" speaker="coachz">Say, Marzipan, peep this: "You take two steps frorward and I'll take two steps back." Huh? No? I'm a cold-hearted snake? Rush rush? The Laker girls?</line>
<line start="4705" end="4753" speaker="homestar">All right, I'm just gonna save everybody some time and burn through these.</line>
<line start="4754" end="4787" speaker="homestar">Pom Pom? Underwater orange juice man? Classic.</line>
<line start="4788" end="4840" speaker="homestar">Strong Bad? Scarecrow and Mrs. King? I would've preferred Jake and the Fat Man, but nice work.</line>
<line start="4841" end="4882" speaker="homestar">The Cheat as the thorax? Love it. Favorite part of the insect.</line>
<line start="4883" end="4929" speaker="homestar">Coach Z? Not sure if I wanna know the answer to this, but did you steal Mickey Mouse's pants?</line>
<line start="4930" end="4967" speaker="homestar">Marzipan, off-duty Ronald McDonald? It is what it is.</line>
<line start="4968" end="5007" speaker="homestar">And finally, Homestar, you seem to be distraught.</line>
<line start="5012" end="5066" speaker="homestar">People try and make me sound a lot... weird, y'know, and I'm strong!</line>
<line start="5067" end="5091" speaker="homestar">And I can... kick...</line>
<line start="5107" end="5161" speaker="strongbad">The King of Town ate the colonel's mustard, and the rope, and the parlor.</line>
<line start="5165" end="5203" speaker="kingoftown">I admit to only two thirds of that statement!</line>
<line start="5214" end="5263" speaker="strongbad">Run, Marzipan, Run—off of a cliff, preferably.</line>
<line start="5266" end="5295" speaker="marzipan"><i>(gasps)</i> You Kinder Überraschung!</line>
<line start="5308" end="5386" speaker="homestar"><em>(Sings Saria's song from The Legend Of Zelda: Ocarina of Time slightly off-key)</em></line>
<line start="5396" end="5488" speaker="strongbad">Oh, the evil moon is crashing into the Earth again! What a totally un-frustrating way to play a video game!</line>
<line start="5499" end="5521" speaker="strongmad">MOVE-A MOVE-A!</line>
</transcript>
</pre>
[[Category:English Subtitles]]


Latest revision as of 14:24, 14 July 2026

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These are the English subtitles for Doomy Tales of the Macabre. watch this toon To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the All-In-One Greasemonkey script for Firefox or the Homestar All-In-One extension for Chrome.
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<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="ween09.swf" width="550" height="400">
  <line start="21" end="22" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">O<span style="visibility:hidden">ne chillèd Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="22" end="23" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">On<span style="visibility:hidden">e chillèd Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="23" end="25" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One<span style="visibility:hidden"> chillèd Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="25" end="26" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One c<span style="visibility:hidden">hillèd Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="26" end="27" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One ch<span style="visibility:hidden">illèd Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="27" end="28" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chi<span style="visibility:hidden">llèd Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="28" end="29" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chill<span style="visibility:hidden">èd Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="30" end="32" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd<span style="visibility:hidden"> Hallow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="32" end="34" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd H<span style="visibility:hidden">allow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="34" end="35" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Ha<span style="visibility:hidden">llow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="35" end="36" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hall<span style="visibility:hidden">ow's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="36" end="37" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallo<span style="visibility:hidden">w's Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="37" end="38" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow'<span style="visibility:hidden">s Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="38" end="40" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's<span style="visibility:hidden"> Eve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="40" end="41" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's E<span style="visibility:hidden">ve I rose</span></line>
  <line start="41" end="42" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's Ev<span style="visibility:hidden">e I rose</span></line>
  <line start="42" end="44" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's Eve<span style="visibility:hidden"> I rose</span></line>
  <line start="44" end="45" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's Eve I<span style="visibility:hidden"> rose</span></line>
  <line start="45" end="46" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's Eve I r<span style="visibility:hidden">ose</span></line>
  <line start="46" end="47" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's Eve I ro<span style="visibility:hidden">se</span></line>
  <line start="47" end="48" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's Eve I ros<span style="visibility:hidden">e</span></line>
  <line start="48" end="50" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">One chillèd Hallow's Eve I rose</line>
  <line start="50" end="86" speaker="strongsad">and sat right down to writing.</line>
  <line start="86" end="124" speaker="strongsad">For none had bothered to propose,</line>
  <line start="124" end="136" speaker="strongsad">to their parties, my inviting.</line>
  <line start="136" end="143">
    <strongsad>to their parties, my inviting.</strongsad>
    <sfx>smack</sfx>
  </line>
  <line start="143" end="152" speaker="strongsad">to their parties, my inviting.</line>
  <line start="156" end="197" speaker="strongsad">So I crafted such a macabre tale</line>
  <line start="197" end="229" speaker="strongsad">there in my darkened room</line>
  <line start="229" end="258" speaker="strongsad">To achieve literary justice,</line>
  <line start="258" end="280" speaker="strongsad">and send each <span style="visibility:hidden">to their DOOOOM!</span></line>
  <line start="280" end="300" speaker="strongsad">and send each to their DOOOOM!</line>
  <line start="433" end="470" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">We start with the most expendable.</line>
  <line start="470" end="498" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Grrrreetings, King of Town!</line>
  <line start="498" end="512" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">For this glutton, <span style="visibility:hidden">a stew of mutton</span></line>
  <line start="512" end="531" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">For this glutton, a stew of mutton</line>
  <line start="531" end="560" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">in which to slowly drown!</line>
  <line start="560" end="595" speaker="kingoftown">I thought these were tales of the McArby!</line>
  <line start="595" end="660" speaker="kingoftown">the mythical fast-food crossover sandwich of legend!</line>
  <line start="679" end="720" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">What's this? The fair maid Marzipan</line>
  <line start="720" end="756" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">considering a brand new man?</line>
  <line start="756" end="790" speaker="homestar">Marzipan! Have you seen my toenail clippings?</line>
  <line start="790" end="817" speaker="homestar">I left them right on top of your toothbrush.</line>
  <line start="820" end="851" speaker="marzipan">Crystal, crystal, on the ball,</line>
  <line start="851" end="873" speaker="marzipan">I need a better boyfriend, y'all! </line>
  <line start="873" end="910" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">But the gypsy forces she invoked</line>
  <line start="910" end="943" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">decided they would play a joke!</line>
  <line start="946" end="972" speaker="homestar">AaaaaaaaAAAAAAA<span style="visibility:hidden">AAAAARRAOOOOOORR!</span></line>
  <line start="972" end="997" speaker="coachz">AaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAARRAOOOOOORR!</line>
  <line start="1000" end="1095" speaker="coachz">Hey there, my little love jorb! These bunions, corns, and calluses aren't gonna pumice themselves! </line>
  <line start="1096" end="1115" speaker="marzipan">Nuuuuuuu... <span style="visibility:hidden">Oh, wait, what's that say? </span></line>
  <line start="1116" end="1131" speaker="marzipan">Nuuuuuuu... Oh, wait, what's that say?</line>
  <line start="1136" end="1158" speaker="marzipan">Nooooooooo!</line>
  <line start="1160" end="1187" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">And now we join a man obs—</line>
  <line start="1188" end="1211" speaker="coachz">Hey, what abrat my doom?</line>
  <line start="1212" end="1274" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Um, you're already Coach Z. No sense in beating a dead horse.</line>
  <line start="1277" end="1289" speaker="coachz">Hey, good point!</line>
  <line start="1306" end="1371" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">And now we join a man obsessed with sales and liquidation,</line>
  <line start="1372" end="1434" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">dabbling with fiendish tests and genetic experimentation.</line>
  <line start="1436" end="1471" speaker="bubs">I'll just take this piece of brain from my wig...</line>
  <line start="1481" end="1538" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">But you all know how these things go, with unnatural creations.</line>
  <line start="1542" end="1555">
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">A puff of smoke! <span style="visibility:hidden">A greenish glow! Voila! Horrible abomination!</span></strongsad>
<sfx>poof</sfx>
</line>
  <line start="1556" end="1571">
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">A puff of smoke! A greenish glow! <span style="visibility:hidden">Voila! Horrible abomination!</span></strongsad>
<sfx>strange pulsating noise</sfx>
</line>
  <line start="1572" end="1581">
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">A puff of smoke! A greenish glow! Voila! <span style="visibility:hidden">Horrible abomination!</span></strongsad>
</line>
  <line start="1582" end="1609">
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">A puff of smoke! A greenish glow! Voila! Horrible abomination!</strongsad>
<sfx>boom</sfx>
</line>
  <line start="1610" end="1614">
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">A puff of smoke! A greenish glow! Voila! Horrible abomination!</strongsad>
<sfx>roar</sfx>
</line>
  <line start="1615" end="1626"><other><span style="visibility:hidden">buffer</span></other><sfx>roar</sfx></line>
  <line start="1627" end="1639">
<bubs>Aw, this was supposed to reduce my overhead! Not turn into my head!</bubs>
<sfx>roar</sfx>
</line>
  <line start="1640" end="1685">
<bubs>Aw, this was supposed to reduce my overhead! Not turn into my head!</bubs>
</line>
  <line start="1706" end="1749" speaker="onionbubs">Welcome to my world! Ehhhhh-heheheheheheeeeeeeh!</line>
  <line start="1773" end="1844" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">These two no-talkers need to go! Let's eliminate a Poopsmith O!</line>
  <line start="1873" end="1883" speaker="sfx">Pumping noises</line>
  <line start="1884" end="1892" speaker="sfx">Bam</line>
  <line start="1906" end="1991" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Oh, uh, and Pom Pom was filled with a deadly gas... that killed the Popsmith... really... fast.</line>
  <line start="2016" end="2069" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Crushed once by a Heavy Lourde in sbemail number two.</line>
  <line start="2070" end="2132" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">To keep this little weirdo dead, only a heavy gourd will do!</line>
  <line start="2133" end="2193" speaker="homsar">My punjab has a pretty price-tag!</line>
  <line start="2240" end="2335" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Homestar Runner, fast, like the whind, but how fast can he run when his knees can't bend?</line> 
  <line start="2336" end="2401" speaker="homestar">Oooh! Hey, this ain't so bad! Gives me the good thoughts, you know.</line> 
  <line start="2405" end="2483" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Well, I'll revise, then, if you please. What if each leg had several knees?</line> 
  <line start="2496" end="2541" speaker="homestar">Hey, great! It's like I'm wadin' through puddin' with every step!</line> 
  <line start="2542" end="2588" speaker="homestar">And everyone knows how much the Homestar Runner loves wadin' through puddin'.</line> 
  <line start="2591" end="2648" speaker="homestar">Strong Sad, these doomy tales of macrame aren't very scary.</line> 
  <line start="2649" end="2672" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Oh, there's an idea!</line>
  <line start="2673" end="2752" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">A crafty fad, once loved by all. I'll hang you on a 70's basement wall!</line> 
  <line start="2755" end="2817" speaker="homestar">Oh no! Macrame! My worst nightmare!</line> 
  <line start="2818" end="2882" speaker="marzipan">But Macrame Owl Homestar, I give you a macrame dream catcher for Decemberween every year.</line> 
  <line start="2884" end="2913" speaker="homestar">My point exactlyyyyyyy!</line> 
  <line start="2935" end="2980" speaker="coachz">Get back upstairs and cook my seventies dinner, woman!</line> 
  <line start="2981" end="3016" speaker="coachz">And put on a pantsuit, fer cryin' out loud!</line> 
  <line start="3018" end="3079" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Halloween is very handy, for those with appetites for candy.</line> 
  <line start="3080" end="3115" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Except for greedy trick-or-treaters...</line> 
  <line start="3116" end="3157" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Like Strong Mad and The Cheat... <span style="visibility:hidden">er...</span></line> 
  <line start="3158" end="3173" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Like Strong Mad and The Cheat... er...</line> 
  <line start="3174" end="3209" speaker="strongmad">CHECK OUT MY NEW TREAT BAG!</line> 
  <line start="3210" end="3226" speaker="thecheat">The Cheat noises</line> 
  <line start="3228" end="3301" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">All night long, they gathered sweets, and tossed upon the growing heap!</line> 
  <line start="3302" end="3374" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">When finally struck the midnight hour, 'twas not just candy he devoured!</line> 
  <line start="3375" end="3457" speaker="strongmad">Phoo! Gah! THE CHEAT? NOOOOOO!!!</line> 
  <line start="3458" end="3536" speaker="strongbad">That's not macabre! Strong Mad eats The Cheat like four times a day! How do you think we give him baths?</line> 
  <line start="3537" end="3602" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Oh, fine! Well, I saved the most <em>macabre</em> for last!</line> 
  <line start="3603" end="3647" speaker="strongbad">I'd like to see you get macabré on mé!</line>
 <line start="3648" end="3716" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">Strong Bad, as he always does, checks emails from his fans,</line>
 <line start="3717" end="3749" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">what if, instead of boxing gloves,</line>
 <line start="3750" end="3784" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="voiceover">a pair of human hands?!</line>
 <line start="3789" end="3873" speaker="strongbad">Aaahhh! I'm hideous! How will I ever type with these waggly knuckled monstrosities?!</line>
 <line start="3902" end="3964" speaker="strongsad">Now all have met their grisly fate, such horrors for you to see.</line>
 <line start="3965" end="4027" speaker="strongsad">Perchance next time they'll all think twice before not inviting me!</line>
 <line start="4038" end="4075" speaker="all">Happy Halloween, Strong Sad!</line>
 <line start="4076" end="4140" speaker="strongsad">A surprise party? Just for me?! Oh, you guys shouldn't have!</line>
 <line start="4141" end="4171" speaker="strongsad">You all really do care!</line>
 <line start="4183" end="4192" speaker="sfx">bam</line>
 <line start="4197" end="4257" speaker="strongsad">Oh. Heh, heh, you weren't really supposed to see that, uh...</line>
 <line start="4258" end="4286" speaker="strongsad">Let's just flick the light back off, shall we?</line>

<!--Easter eggs-->

 <line start="4454" end="4482" speaker="bubs">Hey, Coach Z, you seen my wallet?</line>
 <line start="4484" end="4506" speaker="coachz">Well, what does it look like?</line>
 <line start="4508" end="4549" speaker="bubs">It's the one that says "Bad business practices".</line>
 <line start="4559" end="4700" speaker="coachz">Say, Marzipan, peep this: "You take two steps frorward and I'll take two steps back." Huh? No? I'm a cold-hearted snake? Rush rush? The Laker girls?</line>
 <line start="4705" end="4753" speaker="homestar">All right, I'm just gonna save everybody some time and burn through these.</line>
 <line start="4754" end="4787" speaker="homestar">Pom Pom? Underwater orange juice man? Classic.</line>
 <line start="4788" end="4840" speaker="homestar">Strong Bad? Scarecrow and Mrs. King? I would've preferred Jake and the Fat Man, but nice work.</line>
 <line start="4841" end="4882" speaker="homestar">The Cheat as the thorax? Love it. Favorite part of the insect.</line>
 <line start="4883" end="4929" speaker="homestar">Coach Z? Not sure if I wanna know the answer to this, but did you steal Mickey Mouse's pants?</line>
 <line start="4930" end="4967" speaker="homestar">Marzipan, off-duty Ronald McDonald? It is what it is.</line>
 <line start="4968" end="5007" speaker="homestar">And finally, Homestar, you seem to be distraught.</line>
 <line start="5012" end="5066" speaker="homestar">People try and make me sound a lot... weird, y'know, and I'm strong!</line>
 <line start="5067" end="5091" speaker="homestar">And I can... kick...</line>
 <line start="5107" end="5161" speaker="strongbad">The King of Town ate the colonel's mustard, and the rope, and the parlor.</line>
 <line start="5165" end="5203" speaker="kingoftown">I admit to only two thirds of that statement!</line>
 <line start="5214" end="5263" speaker="strongbad">Run, Marzipan, Run—off of a cliff, preferably.</line>
 <line start="5266" end="5295" speaker="marzipan"><i>(gasps)</i> You Kinder Überraschung!</line>
 <line start="5308" end="5386" speaker="homestar"><em>(Sings Saria's song from The Legend Of Zelda: Ocarina of Time slightly off-key)</em></line>
 <line start="5396" end="5488" speaker="strongbad">Oh, the evil moon is crashing into the Earth again! What a totally un-frustrating way to play a video game!</line>
 <line start="5499" end="5521" speaker="strongmad">MOVE-A MOVE-A!</line>
</transcript>
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