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| [[File:Subtitles Project Logo.png|[[File:Subtitles_Project_Logo.png|80px|thumb|Subtitles logo]]]]
| https://web.archive.org/web/20211001000000im_/http://www.hrwiki.org/w/images/thumb/4/41/Subtitles_Project_Logo.png/80px-Subtitles_Project_Logo.png'''WM0'''
<div class="hovul" style="font-size:90%;line-height:135%;margin-top:6px">
|
 
'''These are the [[English language|English]] subtitles for [[couch patch]].''' [https://homestarrunner.com/sbemail88.html watch this toon]
'''[[HRWiki:Subtitles|HRWikiSubtitlesProject]]'''
To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the '''[[User:Phlip/Greasemonkey|All-In-One Greasemonkey script]]''' for Firefox or the '''[https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/homestar-all-in-one/ekecfcebbojjfaiendgjgcadampmppdb Homestar All-In-One extension]''' for Chrome.<br />It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on [https://homestarrunner.com/ homestarrunner.com] and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our [http://subtitles.hrwiki.org/sbemail88/en local viewer].
 
</div>
| '''These are the [[English language|English]] subtitles for [[couch patch]].''' <span class="hovul" style="font-size:smaller;background:#EEE;border:1px #999 solid;padding:2px;margin-left:6px;white-space:nowrap">[https://homestarrunner.com/sbemail88.html watch this toon]</span>
<div style="font-size:90%">
 
To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the '''[[User:Phlip/Greasemonkey|All-In-One Greasemonkey script]]''' for Firefox or the '''[https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/homestar-all-in-one/ekecfcebbojjfaiendgjgcadampmppdb Homestar All-In-One extension]''' for Chrome.<br />
It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on [https://homestarrunner.com/ homestarrunner.com] and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our [http://subtitles.hrwiki.org/sbemail88/en local viewer].
 
</div>
|}
|}


<div class="hovul" style="font-size:70%; text-align:right;">
'''en''' 
 
[[Subtitles:sbemail88/de|de]] 
'''en'''  [[Subtitles:sbemail88/de|de]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail88/he|he]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail88/es|es]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail88/fr|fr]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail88/nl|nl]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail88/fi|fi]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail88/pl|pl]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail88/pt-br|pt-br]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail88/tr|tr]]
[[Subtitles:sbemail88/he|he]] 
 
[[Subtitles:sbemail88/es|es]] 
</div>
[[Subtitles:sbemail88/fr|fr]] 
<pre>&lt;?xml version=&quot;1.0&quot; encoding=&quot;utf-8&quot;?&gt;
[[Subtitles:sbemail88/nl|nl]] 
&lt;transcript xml:lang=&quot;en-us&quot; file=&quot;sbemail88.swf&quot; width=&quot;550&quot; height=&quot;400&quot;&gt;
[[Subtitles:sbemail88/fi|fi]] 
&lt;line start=&quot;15&quot; end=&quot;43&quot;&gt;
[[Subtitles:sbemail88/pl|pl]] 
&lt;strongbad&gt;I'm goin' to try something a little different.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
[[Subtitles:sbemail88/pt-br|pt-br]] 
&lt;/line&gt;
[[Subtitles:sbemail88/tr|tr]]
&lt;line start=&quot;44&quot; end=&quot;110&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;Print out million dollar bill, dot e-x-e.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;111&quot; end=&quot;115&quot;&gt;
&lt;sfx&gt;computer beep&lt;/sfx&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;116&quot; end=&quot;130&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;What? Oh.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;135&quot; end=&quot;228&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;No for real, print me out a million dollar bill, man, dot e-x-e.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;230&quot; end=&quot;234&quot;&gt;
&lt;sfx&gt;computer beep&lt;/sfx&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;235&quot; end=&quot;340&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;Um, this time &lt;em&gt;really&lt;/em&gt; print me out a million dollars bill, dot nofoolin'.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;341&quot; end=&quot;346&quot;&gt;
&lt;sfx&gt;computer beep&lt;/sfx&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;347&quot; end=&quot;374&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;What the--! Don't give me none of that crosstalk!&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;375&quot; end=&quot;445&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;Oh well, it was worth a shot. Now on to... &lt;em&gt;(sighs)&lt;/em&gt; on to the email.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;446&quot; end=&quot;469&quot;&gt;
&lt;sfx&gt;typing&lt;/sfx&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;470&quot; end=&quot;535&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;&quot;Is there a story buh-heend the patch on the couch? If so, do tell! Form, your pal.&quot;&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;536&quot; end=&quot;552&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;Ooh, my pal!&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;553&quot; end=&quot;580&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;Well Palbert, it's a good story.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;581&quot; end=&quot;609&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;And now you all have to hear it.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;610&quot; end=&quot;671&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;Seems I was looking for a place to hide all my Aztec gold.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;672&quot; end=&quot;705&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;But when I made the first incision,&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;706&quot; end=&quot;753&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;not only did I realize that I don't have any Aztec gold,--&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;754&quot; end=&quot;803&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;--but I unleashed a stench of biblical proportions.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;804&quot; end=&quot;860&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;They had to call in a hazmat team just to hose me hose me hose me down!&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;866&quot; end=&quot;908&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad sfx=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;screaming&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;909&quot; end=&quot;944&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;I had to spend a fortune on Glade plugins.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;946&quot; end=&quot;960&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongsad&gt;Now wait a second!&lt;/strongsad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;961&quot; end=&quot;985&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongsad&gt;That's not how I remember it.&lt;/strongsad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;986&quot; end=&quot;1044&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;Oh, and I'm sure every loser out there wants to hear your loser opinions, loser.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1045&quot; end=&quot;1061&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongsad&gt;They do!&lt;/strongsad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1062&quot; end=&quot;1125&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongsad voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;I seem to remember a young Strong Bad thinking that Olympic sprinter Carl Lewis was a woman.&lt;/strongsad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1126&quot; end=&quot;1161&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongsad voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;And that he was hot!&lt;/strongsad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1165&quot; end=&quot;1189&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;That is entirely untrue.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1190&quot; end=&quot;1219&quot;&gt;
&lt;homestar&gt;Lies! All lies!&lt;/homestar&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1220&quot; end=&quot;1260&quot;&gt;
&lt;homestar&gt;Clearly I'm the only one who remembers how it all went down.&lt;/homestar&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1270&quot; end=&quot;1340&quot;&gt;
&lt;homestar voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;It was not so long ago that I was in Strong Bad's basement spitting Teddy Grahams all over the place.&lt;/homestar&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1351&quot; end=&quot;1385&quot;&gt;
&lt;homestar voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;One of them got stuck to the ceiling.&lt;/homestar&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1400&quot; end=&quot;1420&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot; voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;Homestar, shut up!&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1421&quot; end=&quot;1447&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;This is about that patch on the couch.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1448&quot; end=&quot;1485&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;It's clearly already on there in your flashback.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1488&quot; end=&quot;1512&quot;&gt;
&lt;homestar&gt;Oh, oh, ohhhhh.&lt;/homestar&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1513&quot; end=&quot;1568&quot;&gt;
&lt;homestar&gt;I thought this week's email was entitled &quot;Teddy Graham Memories.&quot;&lt;/homestar&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1573&quot; end=&quot;1613&quot;&gt;
&lt;coachz&gt;&lt;em&gt;(altered voice)&lt;/em&gt; No, no. I got the real scoop.&lt;/coachz&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1614&quot; end=&quot;1664&quot;&gt;
&lt;coachz&gt;Strong Bad had me over for Gumbo one night,&lt;/coachz&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1666&quot; end=&quot;1745&quot;&gt;
&lt;coachz&gt;...and I don't know what kind of doodoo meat he was using in there, but I had to puke!&lt;/coachz&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1746&quot; end=&quot;1802&quot;&gt;
&lt;coachz&gt;So I went downstairs and I noticed this little rip in the couch,&lt;/coachz&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1815&quot; end=&quot;1827&quot;&gt;
&lt;coachz voiceover=&quot;voiceover&quot;&gt;...so I puked in it!&lt;/coachz&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1837&quot; end=&quot;1883&quot;&gt;
&lt;coachz&gt;I... I'm sorry for what I done!&lt;/coachz&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1884&quot; end=&quot;1927&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;I liked that gumbo! I didn't use no doodoo meat.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1928&quot; end=&quot;1976&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;If I ever find out who that guy is...&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;1982&quot; end=&quot;2050&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;Well, palbert, there's your answer. Me? I'm gonna go over there.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2051&quot; end=&quot;2059&quot;&gt;
&lt;sfx&gt;The Geddup Noise&lt;/sfx&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2060&quot; end=&quot;2070&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;Oh wait!&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2071&quot; end=&quot;2087&quot;&gt;
&lt;sfx&gt;typing&lt;/sfx&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2093&quot; end=&quot;2103&quot; &gt;
&lt;sfx&gt;computer beep&lt;/sfx&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2106&quot; end=&quot;2119&quot;&gt;
&lt;homestar&gt;No can do.&lt;/homestar&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2120&quot; end=&quot;2162&quot;&gt;
&lt;strongbad&gt;Oh crap! This computer is worthless.&lt;/strongbad&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2163&quot; end=&quot;2173&quot;&gt;
&lt;sfx&gt;The Geddup Noise&lt;/sfx&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2178&quot; end=&quot;2186&quot;&gt;
&lt;thepaper&gt;Preeeow!&lt;/thepaper&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2203&quot; end=&quot;2263&quot;&gt;
&lt;thepaper&gt;Preeeeeeow!&lt;/thepaper&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2265&quot; end=&quot;2320&quot;&gt;
&lt;homestar sfx=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;spitting noises&lt;/homestar&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2327&quot; end=&quot;2343&quot;&gt;
&lt;sfx&gt;explosion&lt;/sfx&gt;
&lt;thecheat&gt;The Cheat noises&lt;/thecheat&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2346&quot; end=&quot;2385&quot;&gt;
&lt;homestar&gt;Dang, The Cheat. That computer's got something against you.&lt;/homestar&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;line start=&quot;2386&quot; end=&quot;2440&quot;&gt;
&lt;homestar&gt;Did you ever, like, pour Mountain Dew all over it?&lt;/homestar&gt;
&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;/transcript&gt;</pre>
<div id="catlinks" class="catlinks">
 
<div id="mw-normal-catlinks">
 
[/wiki/Special:Categories Category]: <span dir="ltr">[[Category:English Subtitles|English Subtitles]]</span>
 
</div>


</div>
<pre>
<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="sbemail88.swf" width="550" height="400">
<line start="15" end="43">
<strongbad>I'm goin' to try something a little different.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="44" end="110">
<strongbad>Print out million dollar bill, dot e-x-e.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="111" end="115">
<sfx>computer beep</sfx>
</line>
<line start="116" end="130">
<strongbad>What? Oh.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="135" end="228">
<strongbad>No for real, print me out a million dollar bill, man, dot e-x-e.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="230" end="234">
<sfx>computer beep</sfx>
</line>
<line start="235" end="340">
<strongbad>Um, this time <em>really</em> print me out a million dollars bill, dot nofoolin'.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="341" end="346">
<sfx>computer beep</sfx>
</line>
<line start="347" end="374">
<strongbad>What the--! Don't give me none of that crosstalk!</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="375" end="445">
<strongbad>Oh well, it was worth a shot. Now on to... <em>(sighs)</em> on to the email.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="446" end="469">
<sfx>typing</sfx>
</line>
<line start="470" end="535">
<strongbad>"Is there a story buh-heend the patch on the couch? If so, do tell! Form, your pal."</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="536" end="552">
<strongbad>Ooh, my pal!</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="553" end="580">
<strongbad>Well Palbert, it's a good story.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="581" end="609">
<strongbad>And now you all have to hear it.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="610" end="671">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">Seems I was looking for a place to hide all my Aztec gold.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="672" end="705">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">But when I made the first incision,</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="706" end="753">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">not only did I realize that I don't have any Aztec gold,--</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="754" end="803">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">--but I unleashed a stench of biblical proportions.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="804" end="860">
<strongbad>They had to call in a hazmat team just to hose me hose me hose me down!</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="866" end="908">
<strongbad sfx="sfx">screaming</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="909" end="944">
<strongbad>I had to spend a fortune on Glade plugins.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="946" end="960">
<strongsad>Now wait a second!</strongsad>
</line>
<line start="961" end="985">
<strongsad>That's not how I remember it.</strongsad>
</line>
<line start="986" end="1044">
<strongbad>Oh, and I'm sure every loser out there wants to hear your loser opinions, loser.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="1045" end="1061">
<strongsad>They do!</strongsad>
</line>
<line start="1062" end="1125">
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">I seem to remember a young Strong Bad thinking that Olympic sprinter Carl Lewis was a woman.</strongsad>
</line>
<line start="1126" end="1161">
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">And that he was hot!</strongsad>
</line>
<line start="1165" end="1189">
<strongbad>That is entirely untrue.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="1190" end="1219">
<homestar>Lies! All lies!</homestar>
</line>
<line start="1220" end="1260">
<homestar>Clearly I'm the only one who remembers how it all went down.</homestar>
</line>
<line start="1270" end="1340">
<homestar voiceover="voiceover">It was not so long ago that I was in Strong Bad's basement spitting Teddy Grahams all over the place.</homestar>
</line>
<line start="1351" end="1385">
<homestar voiceover="voiceover">One of them got stuck to the ceiling.</homestar>
</line>
<line start="1400" end="1420" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Homestar, shut up!</line>
<line start="1421" end="1447">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">This is about that patch on the couch.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="1448" end="1485">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">It's clearly already on there in your flashback.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="1488" end="1512">
<homestar>Oh, oh, ohhhhh.</homestar>
</line>
<line start="1513" end="1568">
<homestar>I thought this week's email was entitled "Teddy Graham Memories."</homestar>
</line>
<line start="1573" end="1613">
<coachz><em>(altered voice)</em> No, no. I got the real scoop.</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1614" end="1664">
<coachz>Strong Bad had me over for Gumbo one night,</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1666" end="1745">
<coachz>...and I don't know what kind of doodoo meat he was using in there, but I had to puke!</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1746" end="1802">
<coachz>So I went downstairs and I noticed this little rip in the couch,</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1815" end="1827">
<coachz voiceover="voiceover">...so I puked in it!</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1837" end="1883">
<coachz>I... I'm sorry for what I done!</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1884" end="1927">
<strongbad>I liked that gumbo! I didn't use no doodoo meat.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="1928" end="1976">
<strongbad>If I ever find out who that guy is...</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="1982" end="2050">
<strongbad>Well, palbert, there's your answer. Me? I'm gonna go over there.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="2051" end="2059">
<sfx>The Geddup Noise</sfx>
</line>
<line start="2060" end="2070">
<strongbad>Oh wait!</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="2071" end="2087">
<sfx>typing</sfx>
</line>
<line start="2093" end="2103" >
<sfx>computer beep</sfx>
</line>
<line start="2106" end="2119">
<homestar>No can do.</homestar>
</line>
<line start="2120" end="2162">
<strongbad>Oh crap! This computer is worthless.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="2163" end="2173">
<sfx>The Geddup Noise</sfx>
</line>
<line start="2178" end="2186">
<thepaper>Preeeow!</thepaper>
</line>
<line start="2203" end="2263">
<thepaper>Preeeeeeow!</thepaper>
</line>
<line start="2265" end="2320">
<homestar sfx="sfx">spitting noises</homestar>
</line>
<line start="2327" end="2343">
<sfx>explosion</sfx>
<thecheat>The Cheat noises</thecheat>
</line>
<line start="2346" end="2385">
<homestar>Dang, The Cheat. That computer's got something against you.</homestar>
</line>
<line start="2386" end="2440">
<homestar>Did you ever, like, pour Mountain Dew all over it?</homestar>
</line>
</transcript>
</pre>
[[Category:English Subtitles]]


Latest revision as of 14:24, 14 July 2026

80px-Subtitles_Project_Logo.pngWM0

These are the English subtitles for couch patch. watch this toon To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the All-In-One Greasemonkey script for Firefox or the Homestar All-In-One extension for Chrome.
It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on homestarrunner.com and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our local viewer.

en  de  he  es  fr  nl  fi  pl  pt-br  tr 

<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="sbemail88.swf" width="550" height="400">
<line start="15" end="43">
<strongbad>I'm goin' to try something a little different.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="44" end="110">
<strongbad>Print out million dollar bill, dot e-x-e.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="111" end="115">
<sfx>computer beep</sfx>
</line>
<line start="116" end="130">
<strongbad>What? Oh.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="135" end="228">
<strongbad>No for real, print me out a million dollar bill, man, dot e-x-e.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="230" end="234">
<sfx>computer beep</sfx>
</line>
<line start="235" end="340">
<strongbad>Um, this time <em>really</em> print me out a million dollars bill, dot nofoolin'.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="341" end="346">
<sfx>computer beep</sfx>
</line>
<line start="347" end="374">
<strongbad>What the--! Don't give me none of that crosstalk!</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="375" end="445">
<strongbad>Oh well, it was worth a shot. Now on to... <em>(sighs)</em> on to the email.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="446" end="469">
<sfx>typing</sfx>
</line>
<line start="470" end="535">
<strongbad>"Is there a story buh-heend the patch on the couch? If so, do tell! Form, your pal."</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="536" end="552">
<strongbad>Ooh, my pal!</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="553" end="580">
<strongbad>Well Palbert, it's a good story.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="581" end="609">
<strongbad>And now you all have to hear it.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="610" end="671">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">Seems I was looking for a place to hide all my Aztec gold.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="672" end="705">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">But when I made the first incision,</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="706" end="753">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">not only did I realize that I don't have any Aztec gold,--</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="754" end="803">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">--but I unleashed a stench of biblical proportions.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="804" end="860">
<strongbad>They had to call in a hazmat team just to hose me hose me hose me down!</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="866" end="908">
<strongbad sfx="sfx">screaming</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="909" end="944">
<strongbad>I had to spend a fortune on Glade plugins.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="946" end="960">
<strongsad>Now wait a second!</strongsad>
</line>
<line start="961" end="985">
<strongsad>That's not how I remember it.</strongsad>
</line>
<line start="986" end="1044">
<strongbad>Oh, and I'm sure every loser out there wants to hear your loser opinions, loser.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="1045" end="1061">
<strongsad>They do!</strongsad>
</line>
<line start="1062" end="1125">
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">I seem to remember a young Strong Bad thinking that Olympic sprinter Carl Lewis was a woman.</strongsad>
</line>
<line start="1126" end="1161">
<strongsad voiceover="voiceover">And that he was hot!</strongsad>
</line>
<line start="1165" end="1189">
<strongbad>That is entirely untrue.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="1190" end="1219">
<homestar>Lies! All lies!</homestar>
</line>
<line start="1220" end="1260">
<homestar>Clearly I'm the only one who remembers how it all went down.</homestar>
</line>
<line start="1270" end="1340">
<homestar voiceover="voiceover">It was not so long ago that I was in Strong Bad's basement spitting Teddy Grahams all over the place.</homestar>
</line>
<line start="1351" end="1385">
<homestar voiceover="voiceover">One of them got stuck to the ceiling.</homestar>
</line>
<line start="1400" end="1420" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="voiceover">Homestar, shut up!</line>
<line start="1421" end="1447">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">This is about that patch on the couch.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="1448" end="1485">
<strongbad voiceover="voiceover">It's clearly already on there in your flashback.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="1488" end="1512">
<homestar>Oh, oh, ohhhhh.</homestar>
</line>
<line start="1513" end="1568">
<homestar>I thought this week's email was entitled "Teddy Graham Memories."</homestar>
</line>
<line start="1573" end="1613">
<coachz><em>(altered voice)</em> No, no. I got the real scoop.</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1614" end="1664">
<coachz>Strong Bad had me over for Gumbo one night,</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1666" end="1745">
<coachz>...and I don't know what kind of doodoo meat he was using in there, but I had to puke!</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1746" end="1802">
<coachz>So I went downstairs and I noticed this little rip in the couch,</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1815" end="1827">
<coachz voiceover="voiceover">...so I puked in it!</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1837" end="1883">
<coachz>I... I'm sorry for what I done!</coachz>
</line>
<line start="1884" end="1927">
<strongbad>I liked that gumbo! I didn't use no doodoo meat.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="1928" end="1976">
<strongbad>If I ever find out who that guy is...</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="1982" end="2050">
<strongbad>Well, palbert, there's your answer. Me? I'm gonna go over there.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="2051" end="2059">
<sfx>The Geddup Noise</sfx>
</line>
<line start="2060" end="2070">
<strongbad>Oh wait!</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="2071" end="2087">
<sfx>typing</sfx>
</line>
<line start="2093" end="2103" >
<sfx>computer beep</sfx>
</line>
<line start="2106" end="2119">
<homestar>No can do.</homestar>
</line>
<line start="2120" end="2162">
<strongbad>Oh crap! This computer is worthless.</strongbad>
</line>
<line start="2163" end="2173">
<sfx>The Geddup Noise</sfx>
</line>
<line start="2178" end="2186">
<thepaper>Preeeow!</thepaper>
</line>
<line start="2203" end="2263">
<thepaper>Preeeeeeow!</thepaper>
</line>
<line start="2265" end="2320">
<homestar sfx="sfx">spitting noises</homestar>
</line>
<line start="2327" end="2343">
<sfx>explosion</sfx>
<thecheat>The Cheat noises</thecheat>
</line>
<line start="2346" end="2385">
<homestar>Dang, The Cheat. That computer's got something against you.</homestar>
</line>
<line start="2386" end="2440">
<homestar>Did you ever, like, pour Mountain Dew all over it?</homestar>
</line>
</transcript>
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