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'''These are the [[English language|English]] subtitles for [[magic trick]].''' [https://homestarrunner.com/sbemail198.html watch this toon]
'''[[HRWiki:Subtitles|HRWikiSubtitlesProject]]'''
To watch the toon with subtitles, we recommend that you install either the '''[[User:Phlip/Greasemonkey|All-In-One Greasemonkey script]]''' for Firefox or the '''[https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/homestar-all-in-one/ekecfcebbojjfaiendgjgcadampmppdb Homestar All-In-One extension]''' for Chrome.<br />It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on [https://homestarrunner.com/ homestarrunner.com] and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our [http://subtitles.hrwiki.org/sbemail198/en local viewer].
 
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| '''These are the [[English language|English]] subtitles for [[magic trick]].''' <span class="hovul" style="font-size:smaller;background:#EEE;border:1px #999 solid;padding:2px;margin-left:6px;white-space:nowrap">[https://homestarrunner.com/sbemail198.html watch this toon]</span>
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It will give you the option to automatically display subtitles when you view toons on [https://homestarrunner.com/ homestarrunner.com] and those mirrored locally. Alternatively, you may use our [http://subtitles.hrwiki.org/sbemail198/en local viewer].
 
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'''en''' 
 
[[Subtitles:sbemail198/de|de]] 
'''en'''  [[Subtitles:sbemail198/de|de]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail198/he|he]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail198/es|es]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail198/fr|fr]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail198/nl|nl]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail198/fi|fi]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail198/pl|pl]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail198/pt-br|pt-br]]  [[Subtitles:sbemail198/tr|tr]]
[[Subtitles:sbemail198/he|he]] 
 
[[Subtitles:sbemail198/es|es]] 
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[[Subtitles:sbemail198/fr|fr]] 
<pre>&lt;?xml version=&quot;1.0&quot; encoding=&quot;utf-8&quot;?&gt;
[[Subtitles:sbemail198/nl|nl]] 
&lt;transcript xml:lang=&quot;en-us&quot; file=&quot;sbemail198.swf&quot; width=&quot;550&quot; height=&quot;400&quot;&gt;
[[Subtitles:sbemail198/fi|fi]] 
  &lt;line start=&quot;16&quot; end=&quot;70&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;&lt;em&gt;(singing)&lt;/em&gt; I'm gonna check my uhngh, and then I'll check my uhngh, and then we'll turn it out.&lt;/line&gt;
[[Subtitles:sbemail198/pl|pl]] 
  &lt;line start=&quot;83&quot; end=&quot;88&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;&quot;Hey,&lt;/line&gt;
[[Subtitles:sbemail198/pt-br|pt-br]] 
  &lt;line start=&quot;101&quot; end=&quot;132&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;&quot;I am a girl from Sweden and like magic.&lt;/line&gt;
[[Subtitles:sbemail198/tr|tr]]
  &lt;line start=&quot;133&quot; end=&quot;157&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;&quot;Could you do a magic trick?&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;158&quot; end=&quot;194&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;&quot;I would be so happy, and maybe visit some day.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;195&quot; end=&quot;223&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;&quot;Her are a tips to you:&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;224&quot; end=&quot;247&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;&quot;Take homestar runner in a box&quot;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;248&quot; end=&quot;260&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Okay&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;261&quot; end=&quot;274&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;&quot;and take a saw&quot;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;275&quot; end=&quot;287&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Yes, yes!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;288&quot; end=&quot;327&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;&quot;and saw him! From Agnes in Sweden!?&quot;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;328&quot; end=&quot;341&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;You're a girl.&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt; From Sweden. And you want me to take a saw to Homestar Runner.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;342&quot; end=&quot;355&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;You're a girl. From Sweden.&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt; And you want me to take a saw to Homestar Runner.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;356&quot; end=&quot;392&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;You're a girl. From Sweden. And you want me to take a saw to Homestar Runner.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;393&quot; end=&quot;433&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Um, I think we might need to get married, Agnes.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;440&quot; end=&quot;475&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Of course I can do a magic trick, babehoney.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;476&quot; end=&quot;503&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;But what kind should it be, honbaby?&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;504&quot; end=&quot;554&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Are we talking about, like, community center talent show type magic?&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;555&quot; end=&quot;568&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;You know, the kind with&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;569&quot; end=&quot;590&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;cups and balls,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;591&quot; end=&quot;623&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;or those jangly metal rings where the guy's like&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;624&quot; end=&quot;635&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;&quot;Jingle jangle!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;636&quot; end=&quot;670&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;&quot;And now they're &lt;em&gt;separate&lt;/em&gt; rings!&quot;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;671&quot; end=&quot;714&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Ooh, and don't forget the ubiquitous live woodland creature&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;715&quot; end=&quot;763&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;cleverly smooshed into the lining of one's jacket or pants!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;764&quot; end=&quot;803&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;But nothing says low-grade magic substitute like&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;804&quot; end=&quot;837&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;The mystical Cone of Newspaper!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;838&quot; end=&quot;846&quot; speaker=&quot;other&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot; sfx=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;crowd gasps&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;847&quot; end=&quot;921&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Now watch carefully as I pour this full glass of white milk into this cone of newspaper!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;949&quot; end=&quot;984&quot;&gt;&lt;strongbad&gt;Huh? Huh? Err...&lt;/strongbad&gt;&lt;sfx&gt;crickets chirp&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;985&quot; end=&quot;1022&quot;&gt;&lt;strongbad&gt;Uh... Does anyone remember what this trick is supposed to do?&lt;/strongbad&gt;&lt;sfx&gt;crickets chirp&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1023&quot; end=&quot;1046&quot;&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;&lt;strongbad&gt;Uh... Does anyone remember what this trick is supposed to do?&lt;/strongbad&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;sfx&gt;crickets chirp&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1047&quot; end=&quot;1051&quot;&gt;&lt;thecheat&gt;The Cheat noises&lt;/thecheat&gt;&lt;sfx&gt;crickets chirp&lt;/sfx&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1058&quot; end=&quot;1093&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Or I could go a few steps up from that amateur stuff,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1094&quot; end=&quot;1141&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;to the guys that are willing to blow their life savings in the name of magic!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1142&quot; end=&quot;1163&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Or as I like to call them... &lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;moneygicians!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1164&quot; end=&quot;1185&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Or as I like to call them... moneygicians!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1186&quot; end=&quot;1201&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;That's right, folks!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1202&quot; end=&quot;1226&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Gazemaze in gazemazement,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1227&quot; end=&quot;1300&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;as I totally ordered Magic Novelties and Amusement Catalogue Item Number 1407B,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1301&quot; end=&quot;1344&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;assembled it, read the instructions on how to use it!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1345&quot; end=&quot;1369&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;And &lt;em&gt;you&lt;/em&gt; didn't!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1378&quot; end=&quot;1392&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Hate to burst your bubble, man.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1403&quot; end=&quot;1457&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;There's also the subcategory of flowy-sleeved moneygicians.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1458&quot; end=&quot;1489&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;These are the guys with really hot assistants,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1490&quot; end=&quot;1544&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;really high production values, and really not a lot of magic.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1545&quot; end=&quot;1598&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;They might as well just spend their money paying the audience to believe they did magic,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1599&quot; end=&quot;1627&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;instead of putting on a big, pointless show.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1632&quot; end=&quot;1645&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Here's a thousand bucks.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1646&quot; end=&quot;1662&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;I made this building disappear.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1669&quot; end=&quot;1684&quot; speaker=&quot;bubs&quot;&gt;That's gazemazing!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1693&quot; end=&quot;1730&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;Or I could go with the recent trend of street magic,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1731&quot; end=&quot;1793&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;which usually just descends into dudes doing stupid crap to themselves in public.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1794&quot; end=&quot;1815&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;For six straight days,&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt; I will not drink, I will not blink, I will not think!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1816&quot; end=&quot;1832&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;For six straight days, I will not drink,&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt; I will not blink, I will not think!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1833&quot; end=&quot;1848&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;For six straight days, I will not drink, I will not blink,&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt; I will not think!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1849&quot; end=&quot;1865&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;For six straight days, I will not drink, I will not blink, I will not think!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1866&quot; end=&quot;1954&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;And I definitely will not do any magic while standing on top of Bubs' Concession Stand!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1955&quot; end=&quot;1964&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;What magic!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;1974&quot; end=&quot;2012&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;But forget about the different kinds of magic tricks.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2013&quot; end=&quot;2049&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;I think it's time to take Homestar Runner in a box.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2050&quot; end=&quot;2068&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;And take a saw.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2069&quot; end=&quot;2085&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;And saw him.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2086&quot; end=&quot;2117&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Now, we've never met before, have we, sir?&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2118&quot; end=&quot;2157&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;No, good buddy Strong Bad. We have never met.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2158&quot; end=&quot;2191&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;You look like a man of many arms.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2192&quot; end=&quot;2216&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Yeah, I'm like an octopus.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2217&quot; end=&quot;2229&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;All right then,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2230&quot; end=&quot;2266&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;hold still... this might hurt a lot-tle!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2267&quot; end=&quot;2278&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;popping and falling sounds&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2287&quot; end=&quot;2289&quot; speaker=&quot;homestar&quot;&gt;Oops.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2290&quot; end=&quot;2292&quot;&gt;&lt;homestar&gt;Oops.&lt;/homestar&gt;&lt;coachz&gt;That saw didn't even touch him!&lt;/coachz&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2293&quot; end=&quot;2312&quot;&gt;&lt;span style=&quot;visibility:hidden&quot;&gt;&lt;homestar&gt;Oops.&lt;/homestar&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;coachz&gt;That saw didn't even touch him!&lt;/coachz&gt;&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2313&quot; end=&quot;2331&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;He's pure evil!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2332&quot; end=&quot;2354&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Well, sweet wife Agnes,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2355&quot; end=&quot;2381&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;that didn't turn out &lt;em&gt;exactly&lt;/em&gt; as I hoped.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2382&quot; end=&quot;2421&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;But now, not only does Coach Z think I'm a good magician,&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2422&quot; end=&quot;2460&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;he also thinks I'm a class 3 dark wizard!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2461&quot; end=&quot;2485&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Oh, and one more thing, Agnes...&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2492&quot; end=&quot;2518&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Was &lt;em&gt;this&lt;/em&gt; your card?&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2519&quot; end=&quot;2534&quot; speaker=&quot;other&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot; sfx=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;crowd gasps&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2535&quot; end=&quot;2561&quot; speaker=&quot;newpaper&quot;&gt;shuffling noises&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2572&quot; end=&quot;2620&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot; voiceover=&quot;yes&quot;&gt;Wait, Strong Bad, you left out an important kind of magic!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2621&quot; end=&quot;2628&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;What?&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2629&quot; end=&quot;2677&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;The magic of il-l-l-l-l-lusion.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2678&quot; end=&quot;2721&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Ugh, I hope to high Heaven that outfit is an illusion!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2730&quot; end=&quot;2742&quot; speaker=&quot;sfx&quot;&gt;shattering noise&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2743&quot; end=&quot;2769&quot; speaker=&quot;strongsad&quot;&gt;Il-l-l-l-l-lusion!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2770&quot; end=&quot;2773&quot; speaker=&quot;strongbad&quot;&gt;Wah!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2787&quot; end=&quot;2830&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;How can I defeat him, o' my master?&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2834&quot; end=&quot;2881&quot; speaker=&quot;dndgreg&quot;&gt;First you'll have to procure some root of mandrake powder.&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2882&quot; end=&quot;2916&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;Ooh!  I should have plenty o' that layin' around!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2917&quot; end=&quot;2965&quot; speaker=&quot;coachz&quot;&gt;That's what I use to defeat the dark fungus from downungus!&lt;/line&gt;
  &lt;line start=&quot;2982&quot; end=&quot;3041&quot; speaker=&quot;dndgreg&quot;&gt;I'm gonna have to ask you to leave my parent's basement now.&lt;/line&gt;
&lt;/transcript&gt;</pre>
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<pre>
<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="sbemail198.swf" width="550" height="400">
  <line start="16" end="70" speaker="strongbad"><em>(singing)</em> I'm gonna check my uhngh, and then I'll check my uhngh, and then we'll turn it out.</line>
  <line start="83" end="88" speaker="strongbad">"Hey,</line>
  <line start="101" end="132" speaker="strongbad">"I am a girl from Sweden and like magic.</line>
  <line start="133" end="157" speaker="strongbad">"Could you do a magic trick?</line>
  <line start="158" end="194" speaker="strongbad">"I would be so happy, and maybe visit some day.</line>
  <line start="195" end="223" speaker="strongbad">"Her are a tips to you:</line>
  <line start="224" end="247" speaker="strongbad">"Take homestar runner in a box"</line>
  <line start="248" end="260" speaker="strongbad">Okay</line>
  <line start="261" end="274" speaker="strongbad">"and take a saw"</line>
  <line start="275" end="287" speaker="strongbad">Yes, yes!</line>
  <line start="288" end="327" speaker="strongbad">"and saw him! From Agnes in Sweden!?"</line>
  <line start="328" end="341" speaker="strongbad">You're a girl.<span style="visibility:hidden"> From Sweden. And you want me to take a saw to Homestar Runner.</span></line>
  <line start="342" end="355" speaker="strongbad">You're a girl. From Sweden.<span style="visibility:hidden"> And you want me to take a saw to Homestar Runner.</span></line>
  <line start="356" end="392" speaker="strongbad">You're a girl. From Sweden. And you want me to take a saw to Homestar Runner.</line>
  <line start="393" end="433" speaker="strongbad">Um, I think we might need to get married, Agnes.</line>
  <line start="440" end="475" speaker="strongbad">Of course I can do a magic trick, babehoney.</line>
  <line start="476" end="503" speaker="strongbad">But what kind should it be, honbaby?</line>
  <line start="504" end="554" speaker="strongbad">Are we talking about, like, community center talent show type magic?</line>
  <line start="555" end="568" speaker="strongbad">You know, the kind with</line>
  <line start="569" end="590" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">cups and balls,</line>
  <line start="591" end="623" speaker="strongbad">or those jangly metal rings where the guy's like</line>
  <line start="624" end="635" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">"Jingle jangle!</line>
  <line start="636" end="670" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">"And now they're <em>separate</em> rings!"</line>
  <line start="671" end="714" speaker="strongbad">Ooh, and don't forget the ubiquitous live woodland creature</line>
  <line start="715" end="763" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">cleverly smooshed into the lining of one's jacket or pants!</line>
  <line start="764" end="803" speaker="strongbad">But nothing says low-grade magic substitute like</line>
  <line start="804" end="837" speaker="strongbad">The mystical Cone of Newspaper!</line>
  <line start="838" end="846" speaker="other" voiceover="yes" sfx="sfx">crowd gasps</line>
  <line start="847" end="921" speaker="strongbad">Now watch carefully as I pour this full glass of white milk into this cone of newspaper!</line>
  <line start="949" end="984"><strongbad>Huh? Huh? Err...</strongbad><sfx>crickets chirp</sfx></line>
  <line start="985" end="1022"><strongbad>Uh... Does anyone remember what this trick is supposed to do?</strongbad><sfx>crickets chirp</sfx></line>
  <line start="1023" end="1046"><span style="visibility:hidden"><strongbad>Uh... Does anyone remember what this trick is supposed to do?</strongbad></span><sfx>crickets chirp</sfx></line>
  <line start="1047" end="1051"><thecheat>The Cheat noises</thecheat><sfx>crickets chirp</sfx></line>
  <line start="1058" end="1093" speaker="strongbad">Or I could go a few steps up from that amateur stuff,</line>
  <line start="1094" end="1141" speaker="strongbad">to the guys that are willing to blow their life savings in the name of magic!</line>
  <line start="1142" end="1163" speaker="strongbad">Or as I like to call them... <span style="visibility:hidden">moneygicians!</span></line>
  <line start="1164" end="1185" speaker="strongbad">Or as I like to call them... moneygicians!</line>
  <line start="1186" end="1201" speaker="strongbad">That's right, folks!</line>
  <line start="1202" end="1226" speaker="strongbad">Gazemaze in gazemazement,</line>
  <line start="1227" end="1300" speaker="strongbad">as I totally ordered Magic Novelties and Amusement Catalogue Item Number 1407B,</line>
  <line start="1301" end="1344" speaker="strongbad">assembled it, read the instructions on how to use it!</line>
  <line start="1345" end="1369" speaker="strongbad">And <em>you</em> didn't!</line>
  <line start="1378" end="1392" speaker="homestar">Hate to burst your bubble, man.</line>
  <line start="1403" end="1457" speaker="strongbad">There's also the subcategory of flowy-sleeved moneygicians.</line>
  <line start="1458" end="1489" speaker="strongbad">These are the guys with really hot assistants,</line>
  <line start="1490" end="1544" speaker="strongbad">really high production values, and really not a lot of magic.</line>
  <line start="1545" end="1598" speaker="strongbad">They might as well just spend their money paying the audience to believe they did magic,</line>
  <line start="1599" end="1627" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">instead of putting on a big, pointless show.</line>
  <line start="1632" end="1645" speaker="strongbad">Here's a thousand bucks.</line>
  <line start="1646" end="1662" speaker="strongbad">I made this building disappear.</line>
  <line start="1669" end="1684" speaker="bubs">That's gazemazing!</line>
  <line start="1693" end="1730" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">Or I could go with the recent trend of street magic,</line>
  <line start="1731" end="1793" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">which usually just descends into dudes doing stupid crap to themselves in public.</line>
  <line start="1794" end="1815" speaker="strongbad">For six straight days,<span style="visibility:hidden"> I will not drink, I will not blink, I will not think!</span></line>
  <line start="1816" end="1832" speaker="strongbad">For six straight days, I will not drink,<span style="visibility:hidden"> I will not blink, I will not think!</span></line>
  <line start="1833" end="1848" speaker="strongbad">For six straight days, I will not drink, I will not blink,<span style="visibility:hidden"> I will not think!</span></line>
  <line start="1849" end="1865" speaker="strongbad">For six straight days, I will not drink, I will not blink, I will not think!</line>
  <line start="1866" end="1954" speaker="strongbad">And I definitely will not do any magic while standing on top of Bubs' Concession Stand!</line>
  <line start="1955" end="1964" speaker="homestar">What magic!</line>
  <line start="1974" end="2012" speaker="strongbad">But forget about the different kinds of magic tricks.</line>
  <line start="2013" end="2049" speaker="strongbad">I think it's time to take Homestar Runner in a box.</line>
  <line start="2050" end="2068" speaker="strongbad">And take a saw.</line>
  <line start="2069" end="2085" speaker="strongbad">And saw him.</line>
  <line start="2086" end="2117" speaker="strongbad">Now, we've never met before, have we, sir?</line>
  <line start="2118" end="2157" speaker="homestar">No, good buddy Strong Bad. We have never met.</line>
  <line start="2158" end="2191" speaker="strongbad">You look like a man of many arms.</line>
  <line start="2192" end="2216" speaker="homestar">Yeah, I'm like an octopus.</line>
  <line start="2217" end="2229" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">All right then,</line>
  <line start="2230" end="2266" speaker="strongbad">hold still... this might hurt a lot-tle!</line>
  <line start="2267" end="2278" speaker="sfx">popping and falling sounds</line>
  <line start="2287" end="2289" speaker="homestar">Oops.</line>
  <line start="2290" end="2292"><homestar>Oops.</homestar><coachz>That saw didn't even touch him!</coachz></line>
  <line start="2293" end="2312"><span style="visibility:hidden"><homestar>Oops.</homestar></span><coachz>That saw didn't even touch him!</coachz></line>
  <line start="2313" end="2331" speaker="coachz">He's pure evil!</line>
  <line start="2332" end="2354" speaker="strongbad">Well, sweet wife Agnes,</line>
  <line start="2355" end="2381" speaker="strongbad">that didn't turn out <em>exactly</em> as I hoped.</line>
  <line start="2382" end="2421" speaker="strongbad">But now, not only does Coach Z think I'm a good magician,</line>
  <line start="2422" end="2460" speaker="strongbad">he also thinks I'm a class 3 dark wizard!</line>
  <line start="2461" end="2485" speaker="strongbad">Oh, and one more thing, Agnes...</line>
  <line start="2492" end="2518" speaker="strongbad">Was <em>this</em> your card?</line>
  <line start="2519" end="2534" speaker="other" voiceover="yes" sfx="sfx">crowd gasps</line>
  <line start="2535" end="2561" speaker="newpaper">shuffling noises</line>
  <line start="2572" end="2620" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="yes">Wait, Strong Bad, you left out an important kind of magic!</line>
  <line start="2621" end="2628" speaker="strongbad">What?</line>
  <line start="2629" end="2677" speaker="strongsad">The magic of il-l-l-l-l-lusion.</line>
  <line start="2678" end="2721" speaker="strongbad">Ugh, I hope to high Heaven that outfit is an illusion!</line>
  <line start="2730" end="2742" speaker="sfx">shattering noise</line>
  <line start="2743" end="2769" speaker="strongsad">Il-l-l-l-l-lusion!</line>
  <line start="2770" end="2773" speaker="strongbad">Wah!</line>
  <line start="2787" end="2830" speaker="coachz">How can I defeat him, o' my master?</line>
  <line start="2834" end="2881" speaker="dndgreg">First you'll have to procure some root of mandrake powder.</line>
  <line start="2882" end="2916" speaker="coachz">Ooh!  I should have plenty o' that layin' around!</line>
  <line start="2917" end="2965" speaker="coachz">That's what I use to defeat the dark fungus from downungus!</line>
  <line start="2982" end="3041" speaker="dndgreg">I'm gonna have to ask you to leave my parent's basement now.</line>
</transcript></pre>
[[Category:English Subtitles]]


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<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<transcript xml:lang="en-us" file="sbemail198.swf" width="550" height="400">
  <line start="16" end="70" speaker="strongbad"><em>(singing)</em> I'm gonna check my uhngh, and then I'll check my uhngh, and then we'll turn it out.</line>
  <line start="83" end="88" speaker="strongbad">"Hey,</line>
  <line start="101" end="132" speaker="strongbad">"I am a girl from Sweden and like magic.</line>
  <line start="133" end="157" speaker="strongbad">"Could you do a magic trick?</line>
  <line start="158" end="194" speaker="strongbad">"I would be so happy, and maybe visit some day.</line>
  <line start="195" end="223" speaker="strongbad">"Her are a tips to you:</line>
  <line start="224" end="247" speaker="strongbad">"Take homestar runner in a box"</line>
  <line start="248" end="260" speaker="strongbad">Okay</line>
  <line start="261" end="274" speaker="strongbad">"and take a saw"</line>
  <line start="275" end="287" speaker="strongbad">Yes, yes!</line>
  <line start="288" end="327" speaker="strongbad">"and saw him! From Agnes in Sweden!?"</line>
  <line start="328" end="341" speaker="strongbad">You're a girl.<span style="visibility:hidden"> From Sweden. And you want me to take a saw to Homestar Runner.</span></line>
  <line start="342" end="355" speaker="strongbad">You're a girl. From Sweden.<span style="visibility:hidden"> And you want me to take a saw to Homestar Runner.</span></line>
  <line start="356" end="392" speaker="strongbad">You're a girl. From Sweden. And you want me to take a saw to Homestar Runner.</line>
  <line start="393" end="433" speaker="strongbad">Um, I think we might need to get married, Agnes.</line>
  <line start="440" end="475" speaker="strongbad">Of course I can do a magic trick, babehoney.</line>
  <line start="476" end="503" speaker="strongbad">But what kind should it be, honbaby?</line>
  <line start="504" end="554" speaker="strongbad">Are we talking about, like, community center talent show type magic?</line>
  <line start="555" end="568" speaker="strongbad">You know, the kind with</line>
  <line start="569" end="590" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">cups and balls,</line>
  <line start="591" end="623" speaker="strongbad">or those jangly metal rings where the guy's like</line>
  <line start="624" end="635" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">"Jingle jangle!</line>
  <line start="636" end="670" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">"And now they're <em>separate</em> rings!"</line>
  <line start="671" end="714" speaker="strongbad">Ooh, and don't forget the ubiquitous live woodland creature</line>
  <line start="715" end="763" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">cleverly smooshed into the lining of one's jacket or pants!</line>
  <line start="764" end="803" speaker="strongbad">But nothing says low-grade magic substitute like</line>
  <line start="804" end="837" speaker="strongbad">The mystical Cone of Newspaper!</line>
  <line start="838" end="846" speaker="other" voiceover="yes" sfx="sfx">crowd gasps</line>
  <line start="847" end="921" speaker="strongbad">Now watch carefully as I pour this full glass of white milk into this cone of newspaper!</line>
  <line start="949" end="984"><strongbad>Huh? Huh? Err...</strongbad><sfx>crickets chirp</sfx></line>
  <line start="985" end="1022"><strongbad>Uh... Does anyone remember what this trick is supposed to do?</strongbad><sfx>crickets chirp</sfx></line>
  <line start="1023" end="1046"><span style="visibility:hidden"><strongbad>Uh... Does anyone remember what this trick is supposed to do?</strongbad></span><sfx>crickets chirp</sfx></line>
  <line start="1047" end="1051"><thecheat>The Cheat noises</thecheat><sfx>crickets chirp</sfx></line>
  <line start="1058" end="1093" speaker="strongbad">Or I could go a few steps up from that amateur stuff,</line>
  <line start="1094" end="1141" speaker="strongbad">to the guys that are willing to blow their life savings in the name of magic!</line>
  <line start="1142" end="1163" speaker="strongbad">Or as I like to call them... <span style="visibility:hidden">moneygicians!</span></line>
  <line start="1164" end="1185" speaker="strongbad">Or as I like to call them... moneygicians!</line>
  <line start="1186" end="1201" speaker="strongbad">That's right, folks!</line>
  <line start="1202" end="1226" speaker="strongbad">Gazemaze in gazemazement,</line>
  <line start="1227" end="1300" speaker="strongbad">as I totally ordered Magic Novelties and Amusement Catalogue Item Number 1407B,</line>
  <line start="1301" end="1344" speaker="strongbad">assembled it, read the instructions on how to use it!</line>
  <line start="1345" end="1369" speaker="strongbad">And <em>you</em> didn't!</line>
  <line start="1378" end="1392" speaker="homestar">Hate to burst your bubble, man.</line>
  <line start="1403" end="1457" speaker="strongbad">There's also the subcategory of flowy-sleeved moneygicians.</line>
  <line start="1458" end="1489" speaker="strongbad">These are the guys with really hot assistants,</line>
  <line start="1490" end="1544" speaker="strongbad">really high production values, and really not a lot of magic.</line>
  <line start="1545" end="1598" speaker="strongbad">They might as well just spend their money paying the audience to believe they did magic,</line>
  <line start="1599" end="1627" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">instead of putting on a big, pointless show.</line>
  <line start="1632" end="1645" speaker="strongbad">Here's a thousand bucks.</line>
  <line start="1646" end="1662" speaker="strongbad">I made this building disappear.</line>
  <line start="1669" end="1684" speaker="bubs">That's gazemazing!</line>
  <line start="1693" end="1730" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">Or I could go with the recent trend of street magic,</line>
  <line start="1731" end="1793" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">which usually just descends into dudes doing stupid crap to themselves in public.</line>
  <line start="1794" end="1815" speaker="strongbad">For six straight days,<span style="visibility:hidden"> I will not drink, I will not blink, I will not think!</span></line>
  <line start="1816" end="1832" speaker="strongbad">For six straight days, I will not drink,<span style="visibility:hidden"> I will not blink, I will not think!</span></line>
  <line start="1833" end="1848" speaker="strongbad">For six straight days, I will not drink, I will not blink,<span style="visibility:hidden"> I will not think!</span></line>
  <line start="1849" end="1865" speaker="strongbad">For six straight days, I will not drink, I will not blink, I will not think!</line>
  <line start="1866" end="1954" speaker="strongbad">And I definitely will not do any magic while standing on top of Bubs' Concession Stand!</line>
  <line start="1955" end="1964" speaker="homestar">What magic!</line>
  <line start="1974" end="2012" speaker="strongbad">But forget about the different kinds of magic tricks.</line>
  <line start="2013" end="2049" speaker="strongbad">I think it's time to take Homestar Runner in a box.</line>
  <line start="2050" end="2068" speaker="strongbad">And take a saw.</line>
  <line start="2069" end="2085" speaker="strongbad">And saw him.</line>
  <line start="2086" end="2117" speaker="strongbad">Now, we've never met before, have we, sir?</line>
  <line start="2118" end="2157" speaker="homestar">No, good buddy Strong Bad. We have never met.</line>
  <line start="2158" end="2191" speaker="strongbad">You look like a man of many arms.</line>
  <line start="2192" end="2216" speaker="homestar">Yeah, I'm like an octopus.</line>
  <line start="2217" end="2229" speaker="strongbad" voiceover="yes">All right then,</line>
  <line start="2230" end="2266" speaker="strongbad">hold still... this might hurt a lot-tle!</line>
  <line start="2267" end="2278" speaker="sfx">popping and falling sounds</line>
  <line start="2287" end="2289" speaker="homestar">Oops.</line>
  <line start="2290" end="2292"><homestar>Oops.</homestar><coachz>That saw didn't even touch him!</coachz></line>
  <line start="2293" end="2312"><span style="visibility:hidden"><homestar>Oops.</homestar></span><coachz>That saw didn't even touch him!</coachz></line>
  <line start="2313" end="2331" speaker="coachz">He's pure evil!</line>
  <line start="2332" end="2354" speaker="strongbad">Well, sweet wife Agnes,</line>
  <line start="2355" end="2381" speaker="strongbad">that didn't turn out <em>exactly</em> as I hoped.</line>
  <line start="2382" end="2421" speaker="strongbad">But now, not only does Coach Z think I'm a good magician,</line>
  <line start="2422" end="2460" speaker="strongbad">he also thinks I'm a class 3 dark wizard!</line>
  <line start="2461" end="2485" speaker="strongbad">Oh, and one more thing, Agnes...</line>
  <line start="2492" end="2518" speaker="strongbad">Was <em>this</em> your card?</line>
  <line start="2519" end="2534" speaker="other" voiceover="yes" sfx="sfx">crowd gasps</line>
  <line start="2535" end="2561" speaker="newpaper">shuffling noises</line>
  <line start="2572" end="2620" speaker="strongsad" voiceover="yes">Wait, Strong Bad, you left out an important kind of magic!</line>
  <line start="2621" end="2628" speaker="strongbad">What?</line>
  <line start="2629" end="2677" speaker="strongsad">The magic of il-l-l-l-l-lusion.</line>
  <line start="2678" end="2721" speaker="strongbad">Ugh, I hope to high Heaven that outfit is an illusion!</line>
  <line start="2730" end="2742" speaker="sfx">shattering noise</line>
  <line start="2743" end="2769" speaker="strongsad">Il-l-l-l-l-lusion!</line>
  <line start="2770" end="2773" speaker="strongbad">Wah!</line>
  <line start="2787" end="2830" speaker="coachz">How can I defeat him, o' my master?</line>
  <line start="2834" end="2881" speaker="dndgreg">First you'll have to procure some root of mandrake powder.</line>
  <line start="2882" end="2916" speaker="coachz">Ooh!  I should have plenty o' that layin' around!</line>
  <line start="2917" end="2965" speaker="coachz">That's what I use to defeat the dark fungus from downungus!</line>
  <line start="2982" end="3041" speaker="dndgreg">I'm gonna have to ask you to leave my parent's basement now.</line>
</transcript>
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