Non-Sequitur Champion

"Grape...soda...banked?"

Senor Cardgage loses the non-sequitur championship to Homsar and must form a coherent thought as punishment.

Cast (in order of appearance): Homestar Runner, Senor Cardgage, Strong Sad

Places: The Show

Date: Friday, February 29, 2008

Running Time: 1:10

Page Title: Non-Sequitur Champion

Transcript

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Welcome back ladies and gentlemen. Up next, we got a real whip cream special treat for ya. {medium shot of Homestar} Here to complete a coherent thought is the loser of the Non Sequitur Championship, Senor Cardgage!

{Zoom out. Senor Cardgage walks on stage from the left.}

SENOR CARDGAGE: Thank yo, Presbyterian.

{Cuts to a close-up of Senor Cardgage, facing the camera}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: {off-screen} All right, let 'er rip!

SENOR CARDGAGE: {subtitled} Panctice... Squad... Cutterback.

{A buzzing noise is heard and an X with "Nope Way!" under it appears}

SENOR CARDGAGE: {subtitled} Oh... Lifty Fernandez.

{A buzzing noise is heard and an X with "Nope Way!" under it appears. Zoom out to Homestar Runner and Senor Cardgage}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: One more tryyyy.

{Cut back to a close-up of Senor Cardgage}

SENOR CARDGAGE: Uhh... {subtitled} Grape... Soda... Banked?

{Cut to Homestar Runner}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Judges?

{Cut to Strong Sad sitting at a desk drawing on a piece of paper. A plaque reads "Celebrity Judge(s)"}

STRONG SAD: I think we have a winner!

{Strong Sad shows a drawing of a grape soda bottle with eyes and a mouth with an ATM. Below the drawing is the text "GRAPE SODA BANKED!"}

STRONG SAD: Grape soda banked!

{Cut to Homestar Runner}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Hooray!

SENOR CARDGAGE: {ashamed} Oh.

HOMESTAR RUNNER: There you have it, folks! A coherent thought from Senor Cardgage! Until next time, as always...

{as Homestar says the following, the audience joins in and the words appear onscreen}

HOMESTAR RUNNER: Chant words together!

{Credits scroll up as Senor Cardgage and Homestar mumble at each other in the background:

A Sportsinterviews/Chimendez Production

Produced by Cherry Greg

Lighting
Lifty Fernandez

Quizmaster
Juan Aikman

Mr. Runner's Wardrobe provided by
Styles Upon Styles

Finally, a card with "again?" appears.}

Fun Facts

Explanations

• This toon ended a month-long sale of Senor Cardgage and Homsar merchandise, which followed the mention of "Non-Sequitur Champion: Cardgage or Homsar?" in fan club; shoppers were invited to "vote" for their favorite incoherent character by purchasing a T-shirt of either character. Homsar won the title with 63% of the vote.
• Presbyterianism is a family of Christian denominations and a form of Calvinism.

Trivia

• The toon was removed from the Store on May 22, 2008, making it a secret page.

Remarks

• Even when this toon was found in the Store, it was not included in the TV Time Toons menu.
• The Flash file for this toon was originally hosted on videlectrix.com.
• Strong Sad didn't write "Grape Soda Banked" in his usual, elegant handwriting.
• When Strong Sad first draws the picture, it lacks color, but when he shows the camera, the grapes on the label and the bills emerging from the ATM are colored.
• Senor Cardgage has actually had coherent thoughts before. Some of his dialogue in both Senor Mortgage and Senorial Day would qualify as coherent.

Inside References

• This is another mention of grapes.
• Cherry Greg is listed as the producer of this toon.
• Sportsinterviews/Chimendez is listed as the production company.
• Styles Upon Styles is listed as the provider of Homestar's wardrobe.
• The ATM that Strong Sad draws strongly resembles the ATM in Experimental Film.

Fast Forward

• "Chant Words Together" would later be used at the end of the Punkin Show.

External Links

• watch "Non-Sequitur Champion"
• view the Flash file for "Non-Sequitur Champion"
• forum thread re: "Non-Sequitur Champion"