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| '''[[Strong Bad Email]] #94'''
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| [https://homestarrunner.com/sbemails/94-video-games watch]
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| [[the bet|the bet →]]
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"One day technology will catch up with my advanced thinking."

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''This article is about the [[Strong Bad Email]].'' ''For the list of all Homestar Runner games, see [[Games]].'' ''For the DVD exclusive email, see [[Videro Games]].'' ''For the list of references made to real world video games, see [[Video Game References]].''

Taylor R. wants to know what Strong Bad would be like in a video game. Strong Bad explains that it would depend on what system he was on.

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' [[Strong Bad]], [[Atari Strong Bad]], [[Vector Strong Bad]], [[Minor Game Characters|3D Shield Guy]], [[Minor Game Characters|Rhino]]

'''Places:''' [[Computer Room]]

'''Computer:''' [[Compy 386]]

'''Date:''' Monday, January 12, 2004

'''Running Time:''' 3:04

'''Page Title:''' Compy 386!!

'''DVD:''' [[strongbad email.exe Disc Three]], [[Sbemails' 50 Greatest Hits DVD]], [[SBCG4AP Collector's DVD]] (select releases)

{| id="toc" class="wikitable toc" summary="Contents"
|-
| <div id="toctitle">

<span id="contents"></span>
== Contents ==

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* [#Transcript 1 Transcript]
* [#Easter_Eggs 2 Easter Eggs]
* [#Fun_Facts 3 Fun Facts]
** [#Explanations 3.1 Explanations]
** [#Trivia 3.2 Trivia]
** [#Remarks 3.3 Remarks]
** [#Goofs 3.4 Goofs]
** [#Real-World_References 3.5 Real-World References]
** [#Fast_Forward 3.6 Fast Forward]
* [#DVD_Version 4 DVD Version]
** [#Commentary_Transcript 4.1 Commentary Transcript]
** [#Fun_Facts_2 4.2 Fun Facts]
* [#External_Links 5 External Links]

|}

<span id="transcript"></span>
== <span class="mw-headline"> Transcript </span> ==

'''STRONG BAD:''' Email is like a prison. A prison with no walls... and no toilet.

''{reading}''

<blockquote>Hey Strong Bad,<br />
<br />
I was just wondering what you would<br />
be like in a video game and what it<br />
would be like.<br />
<br />
From,<br />
Taylor R.<br />
Queen Creek, AZ</blockquote>
''{Strong Bad reads "AZ" as "Alcatraz."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Whoa. Somebody on the inside. ''{lowers and shakes head}'' Get out soon, Taylor. ''{typing}'' What would I be like in a video game? Well, that all depends on what system we're talking about. Like, if it was on one of those really old machines...

''{Cut to Atari 2600-style game, with an empty green rectangle imposed on a black screen.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' ...the graphics would probably only look ''kinda'' like me.

''{A red square appears representing Strong Bad.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' And I'd run all around a futuristic maze—

''{The square starts moving around the screen and some green blocks and blue glowing barriers appear.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' —collecting things that look ''nothing like'' me.

''{A yellow square the same size as Strong Bad's square appears in the center of the maze.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' Man, that'd be pretty awesome!

''{The red square approaches the yellow square and touches it, thereby "collecting" it. The words "secret collect!" appear on the screen. Cut back to the Compy 386.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' Ooh! Ooh! I could also be in one of those 3-D vector games.

''{Cut to screen of said game. A corridor ending with a wall is outlined in red. Some moving arrows appear on the walls on either side.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' And there'd be this awesome, huge, 3D version of my head floatin' around.

''{A vectorized version of Strong Bad's head appears on the screen}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' Like, it looks so awesome, girls would probably try to make out with the screen—

''{Lipstick lips appear on the screen.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' —and we'd have to program it to be like:

'''VECTOR STRONG BAD''': BACK OFF BABY

''{As it speaks, the words appear on the screen, then fall down and disappear.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' And in this one, the player wouldn't control me...

''{Cut to Strong Bad at the Compy, shaking the camera}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' 'Cuz you can't control me!

''{Cut back to the vector game.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' Instead, you'd be some kinda 3D shield guy with a shield...

''{A generic-looking guy with a shield appears on the bottom of the screen.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' Some kind of ''spikey''-headed 3D cyber-shield guy... with a cyber-shield.

''{The appropriate changes are made so the shield guy is now spikey-headed and holding a striped "cyber-shield."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' And you'd have to block my perplexing 3D geometric attacks, or face ''certain 3D doom''!

''{Vector Strong Bad spits out a rhombus, which the cyber-shield guy blocks. Vector Strong Bad spits another rhombus, and this one hits the cyber-shield carrier in the face, causing it to explode.}''

'''VECTOR STRONG BAD''': YOUR HEAD A SPLODE

''{Again, the words appear on the screen.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' Naturally, there'd be some problems with bad translation.

''{Cut back to Compy 386.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' On the other hand, it might be cool to be in one of those text-based adventures. You know, for those intellectual people with better imaginations.

''{Cut to a black screen with a green arrow at the top (and moving green lines), similar to the [[Tandy 400]].}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' It'd be like...

''{The following text appears on the screen as Strong Bad reads it:}''

<blockquote>Ye find yeself in yon dungeon. Ye see a FLASK<br />
Obvious exits are NORTH, SOUTH, and DENNIS.<br />
<br />
What wouldst thou deau?</blockquote>
''{Strong Bad pauses before saying "Dennis". He doesn't say the last sentence.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' And you'd be all like...

''{Text is typed in on the bottom of the screen:}''

<blockquote>Get ye flask</blockquote>
'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' And it'd say,

''{The text below immediately appears on-screen:}''

<blockquote>You can't get ye flask!</blockquote>
'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' And you'd just have to sit there and imagine ''why on Earth'' you can't get ye flask! Because the game's certainly not going to tell you.

''{At this, the screen adds "I'm certainly not going to tell thou."}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' And there's no precious graphics to help you out, either!

''{At this the screen adds "Graphics, shmaphics." and a few seconds later, " . . for sooth!" Cut back to the computer.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' But oh, man. The best thing ever would be if I was in one of those brand new super-photorealistic games that take like tons of migs and megs of memories just to play it.

''{Cut to a blue screen. A 16-bit version of Strong Bad appears.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' I'd look super-cool, runnin' around on some grass, maybe.

''{The background changes to a 16-bit field against a blue sky.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' Where there'd be like, um... a rhino there, too.

''{A rhino falls down from the sky and some music starts playing.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' A ''hungry'' rhino!

''{A food bowl appears in front of the rhino and it starts whining, jumping and turning red. Strong Bad runs around.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' And I'd have to, I guess... feed him.

''{A box labeled "FOOD" appears. Strong Bad brings it to the rhino's bowl and it calms down, eating the food.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{voiceover}'' And, umm... snakes?

''{Snakes pop up, wriggling up and down the screen. The rhino charges. Cut back to Compy 386.}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{typing}'' So hopefully one day technology will catch up with my advanced thinking, so all the ladies can start making out with their TV screens.

''{Strong Bad stops typing; he turns around as he continues talking. He is holding a [[Cold One]].}''

'''STRONG BAD:''' Until next time, Taylor, this one's for you, and all my peoples got sent up the river.

''{He pours his Cold One on the floor.}''

''{[[The Paper]] comes down. After about five seconds, the four games appear in their boxes.}''

<span id="easter-eggs"></span>
== <span class="mw-headline"> Easter Eggs </span> ==

* Clicking on the ''[[StrongBadZone]]'', ''[[RhinoFeeder]]'', ''[[Thy Dungeonman]]'', and ''[[Secret Collect.]]'' boxes will give a closer image of each box and (if JavaScript is enabled) a pop-up of the game itself.

<span id="fun-facts"></span>
== <span class="mw-headline"> Fun Facts </span> ==

<span id="explanations"></span>
=== <span class="mw-headline">Explanations</span> ===

* Strong Bad's statement about bad translation of ''StrongBadZone'' is a reference to the ubiquitous bad translation of Japanese-made [[Nintendo|NES]]-era games, the most infamous of which gave rise to the phrase, "[[All your base are belong to us]]," which was from the Sega Genesis port of the arcade game ''[[Zero Wing]]''.
* "Migs and megs of memories" refer to computer [[megabyte|megabytes]] and [[Computer memory|memory]].
* When Strong Bad mistakes Arizona for Alcatraz and says "Whoa... Somebody on the inside," he is referring to [[Alcatraz Federal Penitentiary]], a famous maximum-security [[Prison|prison]] in operation from 1934 to 1963.
** The phrase "sent up the river" describing someone being sent to prison is an American idiom, derived from [[Sing Sing|Sing Sing Correctional Facility]]'s location [[Hudson River|upriver]] from New York City.
* Secret Collect is playable on the [[FunMachine]], while Rhino Feeder is playable on the Super FunMachine. The names of these systems are references to the [[Nintendo Entertainment System|NES]] and [[Super Nintendo Entertainment System|Super NES]], respectively.
** However, the jump in graphics quality between the two games is more a reference to the graphics advances between the [[Atari 2600]] and its successors, the [[Atari 5200]] and [[Atari 7800|7800]].
* Forsooth (misspelled here as "for sooth") is an archaic word originally meaning "in truth" but now usually used to express disbelief.
* Strong Bad pouring his Cold One for Taylor is a form of [[libation]], a tradition where liquid is spilled to honor the memory of those who have fallen.

<span id="trivia"></span>
=== <span class="mw-headline"> Trivia </span> ===

* The label on the disk in the floppy disk container reads "[[Floppy Disk Container|bio menace]]".
* Even though Strong Bad threw out his Tandy long before this email, the text game he created seems to be on it instead of his Compy.
* The [[YouTube]] description for this email is "Strong Bad describes what his video game would be like on various systems."

<span id="remarks"></span>
=== <span class="mw-headline">Remarks</span> ===

* When Strong Bad says "YOU CAN'T CONTROL ME!" and he shakes the camera, the contrast on the computer can still be changed.
* The ''StrongBadZone'' game contains the "BACK OFF BABY!" sequence, though it's only accessible when played with a [http://www.squarefree.com/bookmarklets/flash.html seek bar] or [[Viidelectrix|playing the Nintendo Wii version]].
* Although this email was supposed to be about if Strong Bad was in a video game, in ''Thy Dungeonman'' his involvement with the game is only through what he types at the command line. Both the cover and playable version of the game feature a [[Thy Dungeonman (character)|separate character]] from Strong Bad as its protagonist.
* Strong Bad mispronounces the word "ye" in "You can't get [[Ye Flask|ye flask]]!" English used to contain two different symbols for the "th" sound ([[Thorn (letter)|Þ]] and [[Eth|Ð]]), but the first printing presses, built in Germany, did not contain those symbols, so English printers used the "y" character to approximate the "th" sound in the word "the". "Ye" (the article) is commonly confused with a different word, "ye", which means "you" (plural).
* Strong Bad mentions that no one can control him, yet he is the playable character in both ''RhinoFeeder'' and ''Secret Collect.'' Other releases contradict this claim as well, as Strong Bad is the playable character in the [[Egg Throwing Game]], [[Fishing Challenge '91]], [[Strong Bad's Treat Snatcha]], and perhaps most notably, ''[[Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People]]''.

<span id="goofs"></span>
=== <span class="mw-headline">Goofs</span> ===

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* When Strong Bad pours the drink out for Taylor, some of the dust at the top of the Compy's screen from the [[army|previous email]] is still there, though it was not visible in the rest of the email.
* When Strong Bad clears the screen after reading the email, the a> covers the text above for one frame.
* When Strong Bad shakes the camera after saying "BECAUSE YOU CAN'T CONTROL ME!", the top of the Compy has a thin white line above it.

<span id="real-world-references"></span>
=== <span class="mw-headline">Real-World References</span> ===

* Strong Bad's intro is possibly a reference to [[Pete Rose]]'s book, "My Prison Without Bars", which was released the week before this email.
* The graphics in ''StrongBadZone'' closely resemble [[Virtual Boy]] games that used vector graphics, such as ''[[Red Alarm]]''. The Virtual Boy used only black, and three shades of red. See the [#Commentary_Transcript DVD commentary] below for several other titles that [[The Brothers Chaps]] liken it to.
* The name "StrongBadZone" is likely a reference to ''[[Battlezone (1980 video game)|Battlezone]]'', an arcade famous for its use of vector graphics.
* The "3D doom" feature could be a reference to the 3D arcade game [[Discs of Tron]], where the player must deflect discs thrown by their opponent to avoid being destroyed.

<span id="fast-forward"></span>
=== <span class="mw-headline">Fast Forward</span> ===

* ''StrongBadZone'' is featured in [[Main Page 21]], the vector graphics page.
** The phrase "[[A Splode]]" is also used several times later on.
* [[Ye Flask]] appears again in [[Thy Dungeonman]], [[Thy Dungeonman II]], and [[Thy Dungeonman 3]].
* Even though game text in the email says "graphics shmaphics", [[Thy Dungeonman 3]] did use graphics.
** Additionally, the player can get ye flask in that game.
* The [[Disk 4 of 12]] episode on ''[[Disk 4 of 12 - Vampire's Castle|Vampire's Castle]]'' directly references that game as the inspiration for Thy Dungeonman, and the "You Can't Get Ye Flask" gag.

<span id="dvd-version"></span>
== <span class="mw-headline"> DVD Version </span> ==

* None of the four games are playable. As well, the game boxes don't automatically come up. Instead, they are accessible via the hidden Strong Bad icon on the Compy 386 screen.
** For the DVD, the Easter egg consists of samples of music from each game in turn.
* Strong Bad's Cold One continues pouring after The Paper comes down.
* The DVD version features hidden creators' commentary. To access it, switch the DVD player's audio language selection while watching. This commentary is only available on the [[strongbad email.exe Disc Three]] and [[Sbemails' 50 Greatest Hits DVD|Sbemails' 50 Greatest Hits DVDs]].

<span id="commentary-transcript"></span>
=== <span class="mw-headline"> Commentary Transcript </span> ===

('''Commentary by:''' [[Matt Chapman]], [[Mike Chapman]])

'''MATT:''' So this is an email we've been getting since probably the first week that we did Strong Bad Emails.

'''MIKE:''' Yeah, and—

'''MATT:''' ''{simultaneously}'' Remember when we—

'''MIKE:''' For whatever reason, we always shied away from it.

'''MATT:''' Yeah.

'''MIKE:''' And then, for whatever reason, we just came up with the idea.

'''MATT:''' This was like the Japanese cartoon one, we got that a lot.

'''MIKE:''' Yeah. Sometimes it just clicks when you read it and some, you just think of a good idea and sometimes you think of bad ideas, like maybe we'll get a really good idea for how to answer the "How do you type with boxing gloves?" email. Dark... dark night.

'''MATT:''' Umm—

'''MIKE:''' So our friend, uhhh, and, uhh—

'''MATT:''' Collaborator.

'''MIKE:''' Compat-compatriot. ''{laughs}''

'''MATT:''' Contemporary.

'''MIKE:''' ''{laughs}'' Jonathan Howe, we, uhh, I don't know—he threw all these together in, like, three or four days, maybe.

'''MATT:''' Less than that, probably, yeah, we told him—

'''MIKE:''' Hey, we had done it early in the—

'''MATT:''' ''{simultaneously}'' —when we were doing this email.

'''MIKE:''' I mean like midweek, probably. Tuesday or Wednesday, we, uhh—

'''MATT:''' Yeah. Those are really good-looking kissy lips.

'''MIKE:''' Thanks, man.

'''MATT:''' I like that.

'''MIKE:''' ''{laughs}'' Jiggles the camera.

'''MATT:''' Yeah, he gets really close up to it.

'''MIKE:''' Umm, so this is, y'know, like a vector game, like ''Tempest''—

'''MATT:''' ''Battlezone''.

'''MIKE:''' ''Battlezone''... yeah.

'''MATT:''' The original ''Star Wars'' game.

'''MIKE:''' Yeah.

'''MATT:''' Ohh... there you go.

'''MIKE:''' He said, "Your head a splode".

'''MATT:''' I think we were gonna make it ori—if you, when you killed him, he said, "My head splow up". ''{Mike laughs}'' That was the other thing he was going to say. Umm, so yeah, we figured if we were going to do the, uh, this is all sort of—comes from Mike and I, if we ever wanted to make a video game—

'''MIKE:''' Don't tell 'em.

'''MATT:''' Never mind.

'''MIKE:''' ''{laughs}'' Nu-huh—

'''MATT:''' ''{slightly more insistently}'' Never mind.

'''MIKE:''' ''{laughs}'' We're not going to tell you.

'''MATT:''' ''{simultaneously}'' I'm gonna need you all to sign a non-disclosure agreement before I reveal this. Umm, so this is sort of, uhh... I remember... what was it called? ''Vampire'', I think, was one of the text games I played earlier on, and that's what had parapets in it. Was the first thing that—

'''MIKE:''' Oh yeah, I remember parapets, yeah.

'''MATT:''' ''{simultaneously}'' And I had no idea what para—I remember, like, getting the dictionary out and, because, I thought that would, like, when I'd fin—found out what parapets meant—

'''MIKE:''' That was how you won the game.

'''MATT:''' Yeah, then—

'''MIKE:''' ''{simultaneously}'' That was like— ''{laughs}''

'''MATT:''' I would like, it was like the key to it, and I'm just like, "What? It's just like a wall, tower in a castle?" Umm... ''{long pause}'' That rhino looks great, too, Mike.

'''MIKE:''' Thanks, Matt.

'''MATT:''' I think that noise, the noise the rhino makes ''{Mike laughs}'' is just that string on a key—on the synthesizer. There's like, it's supposed to sound like strings of a guitar, like when you're sliding your fingers down, yeah, so are the snakes, and they're just really slow ones and really fast ones. Fret—fret noises, that's what I'm—

'''MIKE:''' Fret magic.

'''MATT:''' Fret magic, really... magazine. ''Bio Menace'', that was a Psygnosis game.

'''MIKE:''' Yeah, with, uh, what was the other one?

'''MATT:''' ''{menacingly}'' ''Blood Money''.

'''MIKE:''' ''Blood Money''.

<span id="fun-facts-1"></span>
=== <span class="mw-headline">Fun Facts</span> ===

* ''[[Tempest]]'' and ''[[Battlezone (1980 video game)|Battlezone]]'' are early 1980s arcade games by [[Atari]]. They were famous for their colored vector graphics, which were very innovative for their time. "The original Star Wars game" likely refers to [[Star Wars (1983 video game)|the arcade game from 1983]], which also features color vector graphics.
* The "Vampire" game Matt mentions is ''[https://www.mobygames.com/game/vampires-castle-adventure Vampire's Castle]''.
* [[Fretmagic]] magazine is mentioned.
* ''[[Blood Money (video game)|Blood Money]]'' was developed by [[Psygnosis]]; however, ''[[Bio Menace]]'' was developed by [[3D Realms|Apogee Software]].

<span id="external-links"></span>
== <span class="mw-headline"> External Links </span> ==

* [https://homestarrunner.com/sbemails/94-video-games watch "video games"]
* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R22zSrpeSA4 watch "video games"] on [[YouTube]]
* [https://old.homestarrunner.com/sbemail94.html watch "video games"] on the old [[Flash]] site
* [https://old.homestarrunner.com/sbemail94.swf view the Flash file for "video games"]

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[/wiki/Special:Categories Categories]: <span dir="ltr">[[Category:Strong Bad Filmography|Strong Bad Filmography]]</span> | <span dir="ltr">[[Category:Vector Strong Bad Filmography|Vector Strong Bad Filmography]]</span> | <span dir="ltr">[[Category:Compy 386 Emails|Compy 386 Emails]]</span> | <span dir="ltr">[[Category:strongbad email.exe Disc Three|strongbad email.exe Disc Three]]</span> | <span dir="ltr">[[Category:Sbemails' 50 Greatest Hits DVD|Sbemails' 50 Greatest Hits DVD]]</span> | <span dir="ltr">[[Category:SBCG4AP Collector's DVD|SBCG4AP Collector's DVD]]</span> | <span dir="ltr">[[Category:Emails With DVD Commentary|Emails With DVD Commentary]]</span> | <span dir="ltr">[[Category:Podstar Runner|Podstar Runner]]</span> | <span dir="ltr">[[Category:Game Emails|Game Emails]]</span>

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Video games - Revision history

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