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← Older revision		Revision as of 14:24, 14 July 2026
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	<!-- Mirrored from Homestar Runner Wiki (hrwiki.org) via Wayback Machine~~; HTML converted to wikitext. Formatting may be imperfect.~~ -->		<!-- Mirrored from Homestar Runner Wiki (hrwiki.org) via Wayback Machine -->
	~~<div class="~~thumb ~~tright">~~		https://web.archive.org/web/20211001000000im_/http://www.hrwiki.org/w/images/thumb/2/29/If_I_Ran_the_Camera.PNG/180px-If_I_Ran_the_Camera.PNG

	~~<div class="thumbinner" style="width:182px;">~~		''Astrid Renee and Grandpa Chapman''

	~~[[File:~~If I Ran the Camera~~.PNG~~\|[[~~File:If_I_Ran_the_Camera~~.~~PNG~~\|~~180px~~\|~~thumb~~]]]]		'''If I Ran the Camera''' was a [[Secret Pages\|secret page]] originally posted on [[homestarrunner.com]]. It was a Flash slideshow that had all the hallmarks of [[The Brothers Chaps\|Mike and Matt Chapman]]'s work, but it was a non-Homestar piece. It featured pictures of their father, [[Don and Harriet Chapman\|Don Chapman]], and their niece, Astrid Renee. Astrid, daughter of [[Karen Wagner]], is the [[Little Girl]] featured in many [[Puppet Stuff]] toons. This slideshow was never linked from any part of the official site, and it was removed sometime in 2003 after The Brothers Chaps realized that fans had discovered it.
	~~<div class="thumbcaption">~~

	~~<div class=~~"~~magnify~~">		Karen Wagner wrote the poem for her father for Father's Day. The poem itself seems to be a parody of "If I Ran the Zoo" and "If I Ran the Circus" by [[Dr. Seuss]]. In the poem, "Grandpa Chapman" is evidently Don Chapman.

	~~[[File:If I Ran the Camera.PNG\|[[File:magnify-clip.png\|15px\|thumb]]]]~~		== Transcript ==

	~~</div>~~		"If I ran the camera for the movies today,<br />
	~~Astrid Renee and Grandpa Chapman~~		Things would be different," said young Astrid Renee.<br />

	~~</div>~~

	~~</div>~~

	~~</div>~~
	'''If I Ran the Camera''' was a [[Secret Pages\|secret page]] originally posted on [[homestarrunner.com]]. It was a Flash slideshow that had all the hallmarks of [[The Brothers Chaps\|Mike and Matt Chapman]]'s work, but it was a non-Homestar piece. It featured pictures of their father, [[Don and Harriet Chapman\|Don Chapman]], and their niece, Astrid Renee. Astrid, daughter of [[Karen Wagner]], is the [[Little Girl]] featured in many [[Puppet Stuff]] toons. This slideshow was never linked from any part of the official site, and it was removed sometime in 2003 after The Brothers Chaps realized that fans had discovered it.

	Karen Wagner wrote the poem for her father for Father's Day. The poem itself seems to be a parody of "If I Ran the Zoo" and "If I Ran the Circus" by [[Dr. Seuss]]. In the poem, "Grandpa Chapman" is evidently Don Chapman.

	~~<span id=~~"~~transcript"></span>~~
	~~== <span class="mw-headline">Transcript</span> ==~~

	~~"~~If I ran the camera for the movies today,<br />
	Things would be different,~~"~~ said young Astrid Renee.<br />
	The special effects and all that kind of stuff<br />		The special effects and all that kind of stuff<br />
	That they show on the screen is not quite good enough.<br />		That they show on the screen is not quite good enough.<br />
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	So I know he won't mind doing some small odds and ends.		So I know he won't mind doing some small odds and ends.

	~~"~~What my movie needs first,~~"~~ pondered Astrid Renee<br />		"What my movie needs first," pondered Astrid Renee<br />
	~~"~~Is a solid foundation, one heck of a screenplay.~~"~~<br />		"Is a solid foundation, one heck of a screenplay."<br />
	And my Grandpa Chapman is just the guy who can write it<br />		And my Grandpa Chapman is just the guy who can write it<br />
	Why I'll bet he can even cast it, produce it and light it!		Why I'll bet he can even cast it, produce it and light it!
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	When I thank the Academy.		When I thank the Academy.

	~~<span id~~=~~"external-links"></span>~~		== External Links ==
	=~~= <span class="mw-headline">~~ External Links ~~</span>~~ ==

	* [http://www.hrwiki.org/mirror/ifiranthecamera.html watch "If I Ran the Camera"] (mirror)		* [http://www.hrwiki.org/mirror/ifiranthecamera.html watch "If I Ran the Camera"] (mirror)
	* [http://www.hrwiki.org/mirror/ifiranthecamera.swf view the Flash file for "If I Ran the Camera"] (mirror)		* [http://www.hrwiki.org/mirror/ifiranthecamera.swf view the Flash file for "If I Ran the Camera"] (mirror)
			[[Category:Side Projects]]
	~~<div id="catlinks" class="catlinks">~~		[[Category:Secret Pages]]

	~~<div id="mw-normal-catlinks">~~

	~~[/wiki/Special:Categories Categories]: <span dir="ltr">~~[[Category:~~Side Projects\|~~Side Projects]]~~</span> \| <span dir="ltr">~~[[Category:~~Secret Pages\|~~Secret Pages]]~~</span>~~

	~~</div>~~

	~~</div>~~

imported>HRWikiMirrorBot: Imported from hrwiki.org via Wayback Machine (HTML→wikitext)

2026-07-14T01:53:31Z

Imported from hrwiki.org via Wayback Machine (HTML→wikitext)

New page

<div class="thumb tright">

<div class="thumbinner" style="width:182px;">

[[File:If I Ran the Camera.PNG|[[File:If_I_Ran_the_Camera.PNG|180px|thumb]]]]
<div class="thumbcaption">

<div class="magnify">

[[File:If I Ran the Camera.PNG|[[File:magnify-clip.png|15px|thumb]]]]

</div>
Astrid Renee and Grandpa Chapman

</div>

</div>

</div>
'''If I Ran the Camera''' was a [[Secret Pages|secret page]] originally posted on [[homestarrunner.com]]. It was a Flash slideshow that had all the hallmarks of [[The Brothers Chaps|Mike and Matt Chapman]]'s work, but it was a non-Homestar piece. It featured pictures of their father, [[Don and Harriet Chapman|Don Chapman]], and their niece, Astrid Renee. Astrid, daughter of [[Karen Wagner]], is the [[Little Girl]] featured in many [[Puppet Stuff]] toons. This slideshow was never linked from any part of the official site, and it was removed sometime in 2003 after The Brothers Chaps realized that fans had discovered it.

Karen Wagner wrote the poem for her father for Father's Day. The poem itself seems to be a parody of "If I Ran the Zoo" and "If I Ran the Circus" by [[Dr. Seuss]]. In the poem, "Grandpa Chapman" is evidently Don Chapman.

<span id="transcript"></span>
== <span class="mw-headline">Transcript</span> ==

"If I ran the camera for the movies today,<br />
Things would be different," said young Astrid Renee.<br />
The special effects and all that kind of stuff<br />
That they show on the screen is not quite good enough.<br />
You can see stuff like that in just any old flick,<br />
But you'd see something different if I made a pic.

Of course, I'd need helpers and the first to be hired<br />
Would be my Grandpa Chapman (after all, he's retired).<br />
My Grandpa Chapman is one of my very best friends,<br />
So I know he won't mind doing some small odds and ends.

"What my movie needs first," pondered Astrid Renee<br />
"Is a solid foundation, one heck of a screenplay."<br />
And my Grandpa Chapman is just the guy who can write it<br />
Why I'll bet he can even cast it, produce it and light it!

With the story all settled the next thing to do<br />
Is to find a location to set up my film crew.<br />
Some place exotic, some place never seen<br />
Some place that looks stupendous up on the big screen.

The jungles of [[Prance]] or the mountains of Prut<br />
Or maybe the River of Brigger-ba-Root<br />
Yes, that's it! My film will be set on a boat<br />
As down the Brigger-ba-Root my cast and crew float.

When the crew is all set and the river is Brigger-ba Rooting<br />
Then will be just the perfect time to finally start shooting<br />
And who better to capture every last detail?<br />
Why my Grandpa Chapman, he just can't fail.

When the shooting is done, then it will be time to edit<br />
And my Grandpa Chapman is the guy who'll get that credit.<br />
When my film's in the can, folks will come from far and near<br />
To rub elbows with me at my movie's big premiere.

Then I'll have to embark on a long publicity tour<br />
And after that, I'll need a spa vacation for sure.<br />
After all, making movies takes a lot outta me...<br />
But I'll be sure to thank my Grandpa Chapman<br />
When I thank the Academy.

<span id="external-links"></span>
== <span class="mw-headline"> External Links </span> ==

* [http://www.hrwiki.org/mirror/ifiranthecamera.html watch "If I Ran the Camera"] (mirror)
* [http://www.hrwiki.org/mirror/ifiranthecamera.swf view the Flash file for "If I Ran the Camera"] (mirror)

<div id="catlinks" class="catlinks">

<div id="mw-normal-catlinks">

[/wiki/Special:Categories Categories]: <span dir="ltr">[[Category:Side Projects|Side Projects]]</span> | <span dir="ltr">[[Category:Secret Pages|Secret Pages]]</span>

</div>

</div>

If I Ran the Camera - Revision history

imported>HRWikiMirrorBot: Reimported from hrwiki.org Wayback HTML→wikitext (full reconvert)

imported>HRWikiMirrorBot: Imported from hrwiki.org via Wayback Machine (HTML→wikitext)