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	<!-- Mirrored from Homestar Runner Wiki (hrwiki.org) via Wayback Machine; HTML converted to wikitext. Formatting may be imperfect. -->		<!-- Mirrored from Homestar Runner Wiki (hrwiki.org) via Wayback Machine; HTML converted to wikitext. Formatting may be imperfect. -->
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	\| '''Toon Category: Shorts'''		\| '''Toon Category: Shorts'''
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	\| '''Old Toon Category: ~~Powered~~ by The Cheat'''		\| '''Old Toon Category: [[Powered by The Cheat]]'''
	\| {\| class="wikitable" align="right" border="1" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" style="background:#f2f2f2; border:1px solid #ccc; padding:5px; font-size:x-small; line-height:100%; border-collapse:collapse;"		\| {\| class="wikitable" align="right" border="1" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" style="background:#f2f2f2; border:1px solid #ccc; padding:5px; font-size:x-small; line-height:100%; border-collapse:collapse;"
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	'''DAVEY:''' I'm gonna sing it.<br />		'''DAVEY:''' I'm gonna sing it.<br />

	~~'''STAVE:''' Uh-huh.<br />~~		'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{spoken}'' Uh-huh. I already don't like the sound of this one. ''{sarcastically}'' Ohh, vomit-inducing! My favorite!<br />
	'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{spoken}'' I already don't like the sound of this one. ''{sarcastically}'' Ohh, vomit-inducing! My favorite!<br />
	'''STAVE:''' ''{singing throughout}'' Come down from your crystal fortress, oh Strong Bad,<br />		'''STAVE:''' ''{singing throughout}'' Come down from your crystal fortress, oh Strong Bad,<br />
	'''STRONG BAD:''' What?<br />		'''STRONG BAD:''' What?<br />
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	'''STAVE:''' Please come down from your crystal fortress<br />		'''STAVE:''' Please come down from your crystal fortress<br />
	'''OTHER ~~GUY~~:''' Strong Bad<br />		'''OTHER SINGER:''' Strong Bad<br />
	'''STRONG BAD:''' No.<br />		'''STRONG BAD:''' No.<br />
	'''STAVE:''' Please come down from your crystal fortress<br />		'''STAVE:''' Please come down from your crystal fortress<br />
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	'''OTHER SINGER:''' Strong Bad.<br />		'''OTHER SINGER:''' Strong Bad.<br />
	'''THIRD SINGER:''' Strong Bad.<br />		'''THIRD SINGER:''' Strong Bad.<br />
	'''STRONG BAD:''' Shut up... you stupid hippie.<br />		'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' Shut up... you stupid hippie.<br />

	'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{spoken}'' I'm-a gonna throw a brick at your cellist.<br />		'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{spoken}'' I'm-a gonna throw a brick at your cellist.<br />
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	* Strong Bad stylized as a "Haddi-Man" kid has [[Lack of Visible Body Parts\|ears]].		* Strong Bad stylized as a "Haddi-Man" kid has [[Lack of Visible Body Parts\|ears]].
	* This was the first toon updated to use the [[Ruffle]] Flash emulator, before the [[homestarrunner.com\|website]] was completely overhauled to use it on December 31, 2020.		* This was the first toon updated to use the [[Ruffle]] Flash emulator, before the [[homestarrunner.com\|website]] was completely overhauled to use it on December 31, 2020.
			* The backup singer during Strong Bad's rock section is [[Sharon Jones]] as revealed in a [[@StrongBadActual Tweets 2020\|tweet]].

	<span id="remarks"></span>		<span id="remarks"></span>

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{| class="wikitable" width="100%" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2"
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| '''Toon Category: Shorts'''
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|-
| [https://homestarrunner.com/toons/crystal-fortress watch]
| [[The Animated Adventures of Puppet Homestar|← The Animated Adventures of Puppet Homestar]]
| [[Fish Eye Lens|Fish Eye Lens →]]
|}

|}

{| class="wikitable" width="100%" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2"
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| '''Old Toon Category: Powered by The Cheat'''
| {| class="wikitable" align="right" border="1" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" style="background:#f2f2f2; border:1px solid #ccc; padding:5px; font-size:x-small; line-height:100%; border-collapse:collapse;"
|-
| [[Trudgemank|← Trudgemank]]
| [[Fish Eye Lens|Fish Eye Lens →]]
|}

|}

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[[File:crystal fortress.png|[[File:crystal_fortress.png|220px|thumb]]]]
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[[File:crystal fortress.png|[[File:magnify-clip.png|15px|thumb]]]]

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"Unicorns?! Who-who are you?"

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In this partially-[[Powered by The Cheat]] music video, Davey attempts to call Strong Bad from his crystal fortress — but the wrestleman has got some countermeasures!

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' Davey, [[Stave]], [[Strong Bad]], Unicorn, Haddi-Man kids

'''Date:''' Monday, September 28, 2009

'''Running Time:''' 2:09

'''Page Title:''' Davey Gets His Due!

{| id="toc" class="wikitable toc" summary="Contents"
|-
| <div id="toctitle">


== Contents ==

</div>
* [#Transcript 1 Transcript]
* [#Fun_Facts 2 Fun Facts]
** [#Explanations 2.1 Explanations]
** [#Trivia 2.2 Trivia]
** [#Remarks 2.3 Remarks]
** [#Goofs 2.4 Goofs]
** [#Inside_References 2.5 Inside References]
** [#Real-World_References 2.6 Real-World References]
* [#See_Also 3 See Also]
* [#External_Links 4 External Links]

|}


== Transcript ==

'''DAVEY:''' Mmm. French fries. 
'''OTHER GUY:''' Mmm. Yeah, they're good. Gee, Davey, Strong Bad always seems so hostile. I bet he doesn't even know how much everybody loves him. 
'''DAVEY:''' Nope, nope. I don't think so either. 
'''OTHER GUY:''' Nope. 
'''DAVEY:''' I've written a song I think'll make Strong Bad understand. 
'''OTHER GUY:''' Oh? 
'''DAVEY:''' I'm gonna sing it. 

'''STAVE:''' Uh-huh. 
'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{spoken}'' I already don't like the sound of this one. ''{sarcastically}'' Ohh, vomit-inducing! My favorite! 
'''STAVE:''' ''{singing throughout}'' Come down from your crystal fortress, oh Strong Bad, 
'''STRONG BAD:''' What? 
'''STAVE:''' A unicorn awaits at a rainbow bridge, 
'''STRONG BAD:''' ''Unicorns?!'' Who a–who are you? 
'''STAVE:''' Her head is bowed and a tiny tear traces these words in the dew. 
'''STRONG BAD:''' All right, you whiny weasels. 

'''STAVE:''' Please come down from your crystal fortress 
'''OTHER SINGER:''' ''{singing back up vocals throughout}'' Strong Bad 
'''STAVE:''' Please come down from your crystal fortress, 
'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{singing}'' Shut up. 
'''OTHER SINGER:''' ''{simultaneously}'' Strong Bad 
'''STAVE:''' Please come down from your crystal fortress. 

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{screamed}'' Throw me a squeedley guitar! 
'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{electric guitar music}'' Let me tell ya, 
'''STRONG BAD:''' You get French fries, and you get French fries, but ''you'' don't get French fries, 
'''STRONG BAD:''' That's right! You get French fries, and you get French fries, but ''you'' don't get no French fries, 
'''OTHER SINGER:''' ''{simultaneously, heavy metal style screaming}'' You don't get french friiies. You get french friiiiies! They Might be Giiiants, gets no french friiies! Yeeah-ah yeah-ah yeah ah! 
'''STRONG BAD:''' You get the French fries, and you get the French fries, but '''''you''''' don't get French fries! 
'''STRONG BAD:''' Ohh! 
'''STRONG BAD:''' Ahh! 

'''STAVE:''' Unchain your trembling hopes and dreams, oh Strong Bad, 
'''STRONG BAD:''' ''Awwwwwwww!'' I thought you were done. 
'''STAVE:''' The love you deny is the key that will melt the lock, 
'''STRONG BAD:''' I'll melt your face! 
'''STAVE:''' Our golden shining spirits, 
'''STRONG BAD:''' Eww! 
'''STAVE:''' will all join hands and sing. 

'''STAVE:''' Please come down from your crystal fortress 
'''OTHER GUY:''' Strong Bad 
'''STRONG BAD:''' No. 
'''STAVE:''' Please come down from your crystal fortress 
'''OTHER SINGER:''' Strong Bad 
'''STRONG BAD:''' I'm not coming down from no place. 
'''STAVE:''' Please come down from your crystal fortress. 
'''OTHER SINGER:''' Strong Bad. 
'''THIRD SINGER:''' Strong Bad. 
'''STRONG BAD:''' Shut up... you stupid hippie. 

'''STRONG BAD:''' ''{spoken}'' I'm-a gonna throw a brick at your cellist. 

''{A crash is heard, with the sound of a piano being broken}''


== Fun Facts ==


=== Explanations ===

* This song comes from [[They Might Be Giants]] [[index.php/Podcast 37A|Podcast 37A]], which was released eleven months before this toon. During the podcast, John Flansburgh mentions that the song is "hopefully going to be made into something with Homestar."


=== Trivia ===

* The [[FeedBurner Page|RSS description]] of this toon is:

<blockquote>'''Matt says''' - Here's a little something we made years ago with the They Might Be Giants boys that we never really did anything with (they released it on a podcast one time, though). So we figured we'd give the keys to The Cheat (in his first video since hip-hop/death metal smash hit [https://homestarrunner.com/trudgemank.html Trudgemank])and mix it with a healthy dose of 'Stave it Off Guy' from the '[[for kids]]' sbemail. I've just been calling him Stave for short. My dream was always to get Linnell dressed up like Stave and have puppet Strong Bad harrass and harangue him but that puppet weighs too freaking much to take anywhere.</blockquote>
* This is the only Powered by The Cheat cartoon on [[homestarrunner.com]] not to show The Cheat or anyone else at the end.
* Strong Bad stylized as a "Haddi-Man" kid has [[Lack of Visible Body Parts|ears]].
* This was the first toon updated to use the [[Ruffle]] Flash emulator, before the [[homestarrunner.com|website]] was completely overhauled to use it on December 31, 2020.


=== Remarks ===

* Although Strong Bad says he's "gonna throw a brick at [their] cellist", the instrument that is heard afterward is a piano.
* [[Matt Chapman]] refers to the singer in the RSS entry as "Stave".
* Although Strong Bad reacts as if he hates unicorns, he did say he wanted a poster of a unicorn riding a snowmobile in [[portrait]].


=== Goofs ===

* The girl is the only one of the Haddi-Man kids that does not have a shadow.
* During the scene where the unicorn is heading towards the key, the background runs out and shows white at the very last frame. This is most noticeable in the Flash file.


=== Inside References ===

* [[French Fries|French fries]] are commonly seen and mentioned throughout the music video.
* Inside Davey's mouth, there are French fries [[Food Still In Peel or Package|still in the box]].
* The guitarist first appeared in [[Whaddaya Know, Haddi-Man?|Whaddaya Know, Haddi-man?]] in [[for kids]], as did the three children.
** Also, "Haddi-Man", who was listed as one of the directors, was [[Homsar]]'s public television name in the same email.
* Strong Bad declares the music to be [[Puking|vomit]]-inducing.
* Strong Bad's comments throughout the song are similar to those in [[Sensitive to Bees]]. In both songs, he responds to the first sung line with "What?".
* Strong Bad says he'll melt the guitarist's face; in [[coloring]], he attempted to "melt" Limozeen's faces with his [[Crayons|crayons]]. Also, in the DVD commentary for [[the bet]], Strong Bad connects "guitar-shredding" with face-melting.
* When Strong Bad is seen on the mountaintop, he is depicted as being [[Exaggerated Strong Bad|really muscular]].
* The pixelated lightning bolts at the beginning of Strong Bad's metal segment are directly imported from the [[Peasant's Quest]] title screen.
* Strong Bad threatens to [[Throwing Bricks|throw a brick]], something he also did in the [[Sketchbook (video)|DVD Sketchbook]] and [[the process]].
* At the beginning of Strong Bad's metal segment, the picture shown in the background is the [http://www.allposters.com/-sp/Unicorn-in-Paradise-Posters_i1314254_.htm "Unicorn In Paradise"] poster (sans unicorn), which was also seen in [[Strong Bad Main Page|his bedroom]].
* This toon prominently features [[Unicorns|unicorns]].


=== Real-World References ===

* Davey's costume before Strong Bad appears on the mountaintop is based on that of [[Brynhildr|Brunnhilde]] from [[Richard Wagner|Wagner]]'s [[Der Ring des Nibelungen|"Ring" cycle]]. It is considered an iconic and stereotypical operatic costume.
* The scene with Strong Bad on the mountaintop is reminiscent of [[Night on Bald Mountain|"Night On Bald Mountain"]] sequence of the [[Disney]] movie, ''[[Fantasia (film)|Fantasia]]'', with Strong Bad as Chernabog.
** It may also be a reference to the introduction of [[Quest for Glory II: Trial By Fire]], since the "[[Sierra]] Presents" logo also has a purple genie appearing from behind a mountain.
* The line "You get French fries, and you get French fries, but you don't get French fries" may be a reference to the They Might Be Giants song, "Even Numbers", which contains the line, "you like French fries, but you don't like French fries".


== See Also ==

* The [[Crystal Fortress Visuals|visuals]] for this video
* The [[Crystal Fortress Tablature|guitar tablature]] for the song


== External Links ==

* [https://homestarrunner.com/toons/crystal-fortress watch "Crystal Fortress"]
* [https://old.homestarrunner.com/crystal.html watch "Crystal Fortress"] on the old [[Flash]] site
* [https://old.homestarrunner.com/crystal.swf view the Flash file for "Crystal Fortress"]
* [http://forum.hrwiki.org/viewtopic.php?t=15804 forum thread re: "Crystal Fortress"]
* [http://www.tmbg.com/_media/_pod/TMBGPodcast37A.mp3 download podcast MP3]
* [[index.php/Crystal Fortress|see the This Might Be a Wiki article for "Crystal Fortress"]]

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[/wiki/Special:Categories Categories]: [[Category:Strong Bad Filmography|Strong Bad Filmography]] | [[Category:Powered by The Cheat|Powered by The Cheat]] | [[Category:Music Videos|Music Videos]] | [[Category:Shorts|Shorts]]

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Crystal Fortress - Revision history

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